Our Gemara tells us about the extensive care and modesty of a woman named Kimchis. She said, “In all my days, the beams of my house never saw the braids of my hair.” The Gemara considers this as a possible reason for how she merited to have seven sons, each of whom had an opportunity to serve as Cohen Godol.
Aside from the obvious lesson and inspiration regarding this woman’s modesty, there are a number of points I will highlight.
At first glance, Kimchis’s actions seem extreme, and might we even say, support the custom of certain communities to have their women shave their heads. However, actually the opposite is implied here. My goal is not to disparage that particular custom. Whomever follows a holy Jewish custom with the proper intentions should be blessed. Rather, Litvak that I am, I would like to accurately depict what this Gemara is actually saying about the extent of hair covering that is encouraged, and show that the Gemara at least is not referring in any way to this custom.
The first and most important feature of this statement is that Kimchis HAD HAIR to be careful about covering. She mentions braids, so we know that she did not shave her head. Also, the actual choice of words, braids and not hair, is interesting. We might understand the Gemara to be saying a chiddush, that Kimchis was careful to even cover her braids, which are already tied up. Notably though Rav Henkin in שו״ת בני בנים ג:כ״א is medayyek a leniency. Namely, random loose hair outside of the braid was not part of Kimchis’s chumrah. However, Rav Henkin also acknowledged that other communities, long after Kimchis’ era, may have taken on customs of greater restrictions.
Tosafos Yeshanim here is careful to point out a qualifier:
לא ראו קורות ביתי קלעי שערי. בשעה שהיתה יכולה לכסותם:
Not that Kimchis literally NEVER let the beams of her house see her hair, as that would be impossible. Rather, it means she was as careful as possible.
If Tosafos Yeshanim thought Kimchis had a custom of shaving her head, then he would not have needed to state a qualifier and could have learned Kimchis’s statement literally.
One final note. If there should be a husband out there who sees fit to insist his wife follow the practice of Kimchis, he should equally take upon himself another practice described in the Gemara regarding men, modesty, and the walls of their home.
The Gemara Shabbos (118b) states
וְאָמַר רַבִּי יוֹסֵי: מִיָּמַי לֹא רָאוּ קוֹרוֹת בֵּיתִי אִימְרֵי חֲלוּקִי
Rabbi Yosei said: In all my days, the walls of my house never saw the seams of my robe due to modesty, as he would only undress under his bed sheets.
This is in fact codified as halakha (Shulkhan Arukh OH end of 239, see Be’er HaGolah.)
So if you want to be makpid on one idea of modesty, make sure to be makpid on the others as well. This is reminiscent of a responsum of Rav Moshe (EH II:12). In this responsum he discussed the debate of whether a sheitel is maris ayin, in that it may appear as if one is not covering her hair. Rav Moshe rules it is not, as he believes in the end, people have “Fradar”, and frum women can tell if it is sheitel or not. He then compares it to shaving with an electric shaver (which he permits), and states that it is not maris ayin for a razor, as frum men can tell, and even if he uses a depilatory cream, frum people will assume that he used that instead of a razor. At the very least, no clean-shaven man should insist that his wife cannot wear a sheitel, given that both of them rely on the same heter.
In terms of other Gemaras that refer to women's hair, and evidence that they did not shave their hair, Mishna Nazir (28a) discusses the circumstances where the husband as justification for breaking his wife’s vow, that is when it is considered an interference in their personal life. One such circumstance is when she is a Nazir, as the Mishna says, he can say, “I do not want an ugly wife”. One might think the interpretation has to do with the various abstentions from a Nazir not being able to cut hair, perhaps it cannot be styled properly? And do not tell me that in those days they had the custom of shaving women’s hair, because later in the very same Mishna Rabbi Meir has the opinion that the husband can object to her Nazir status for the very reason that at the end of her Nazirite period, she must fully shave her hair which would be ugly to him. Additionally, the Gemara (Nedarim 50a) records in the story of Rachel and Rabbi Akiva, that straw was in her hair, causing him to promise her that one day when they have money he will buy her a golden crown to adorn her head.