Our Mishna on Amud Beis textually analyzes a Mishna which discusses the financial rights shared by a person who rents or uses a vineyard as a tenant farmer. The Mishna states:

 

כְּשֵׁם שֶׁחוֹלְקִין בַּיַּיִן, כָּךְ חוֹלְקִין בַּזְּמוֹרוֹת וּבַקָּנִים. וּשְׁנֵיהֶם מְסַפְּקִין אֶת הַקָּנִים:

 

Just as the halakha is that the owner of the field and the one cultivating it divide the wine, so too the halakha is that they divide the branches pruned from the vines and the poles (used to support the vines). And the two of them, i.e., the landowner and the one cultivating the field, both supply the poles.

 

וּשְׁנֵיהֶם מְסַפְּקִין אֶת הַקָּנִים: לְמָה לִי ? מָה טַעַם קָאָמַר מָה טַעַם שְׁנֵיהֶם חוֹלְקִין בַּקָּנִים מִשּׁוּם דִּשְׁנֵיהֶם מְסַפְּקִין אֶת הַקָּנִים:

 

And the two of them, i.e., the landowner and the one cultivating the field, both supply the poles. The Gemara asks: Why do I need the mishna to state this? The Gemara answers that the mishna is saying what the reason is for its ruling: What is the reason that the two of them divide the poles? It is because the two of them supply the poles.

 

The Mishna utilizes a syntactic system whereby the final clause connected by the word “and” signals that it is an explanation for the prior clause. Thus, the Mishna is not stating two separate facts, “They divide the poles - And - the landowner and the one cultivating the field, both supply the poles.” Instead it is understood as a statement and accompanying explanation. It reads as follows: “They divide the poles - due to the fact that both the landowner and the one cultivating the field, supply the poles.”

 

This way of understanding Hebrew prose is used by the Tosefes Beracha to explain a difficult verse in Bereishis (37:10-11). The verse narrates Yosef’s brothers and his father’s reactions to his seemingly grandiose dreams, suggesting that his family will one day bow down to him subserviently:

 

וַיְסַפֵּ֣ר אֶל־אָבִיו֮ וְאֶל־אֶחָיו֒ וַיִּגְעַר־בּ֣וֹ אָבִ֔יו וַיֹּ֣אמֶר ל֔וֹ מָ֛ה הַחֲל֥וֹם הַזֶּ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֣ר חָלָ֑מְתָּ הֲב֣וֹא נָב֗וֹא אֲנִי֙ וְאִמְּךָ֣ וְאַחֶ֔יךָ לְהִשְׁתַּחֲוֺ֥ת לְךָ֖ אָֽרְצָה׃

 

And when he told it to his father and brothers, his father berated him. “What,” he said to him, “is this dream you have dreamed? Are we to come, I and your mother and your brothers, and bow low to you to the ground?”

 

וַיְקַנְאוּ־ב֖וֹ אֶחָ֑יו וְאָבִ֖יו שָׁמַ֥ר אֶת־הַדָּבָֽר׃

 

So his brothers were jealous of him, and his father kept watch over the matter.

 

One might ask, why were the brothers so jealous when clearly their father, the patriarch, strongly berated and ridiculed Yosef’s dreams? And, what is the sequitur, “So his brothers were jealous of him, and his father kept watch over the matter.”?

 

If we understand the second clause as an explanation for the first clause, like our Mishna’s text, we may then read the verse as follows: “So his brothers were jealous of him, due to the fact that his father secretly kept watch over the matter.” Meaning to say, Yaakov put on an apparently unconvincing show that he was outraged at Yosef’s dream. The brothers sensed this, and became even more jealous. They realized that their father thought that there was substance to the young upstart’s ambitions

 

The Hebrew word in this usage for “watch” is “shamor” which also has a connotation of watching in anticipation. That’s why the connotation that “Yaakov watched over the matter” is that he somehow was waiting to see what would happen, hoping to see what would happen. Similarly, in the Ten Commandments it states to “watch” or “guard” the Shabbos. The commentaries understand it to me to look forward to and anticipate the coming of Shabbos or anticipating, and looking forward to performing other mitzvos. (See for example, Ohr Hachaim Shemos 31:16 and Kedushas Levi, Vayetze 31.)

 

An important lesson here is that truly, there are no secrets in families. Even when secrets are successfully kept in a technical sense, family members pick up on emotions and attitudes. Despite Yaakov’s efforts to protect his other sons from feeling jealous over his future leadership, his sons sensed that he believed the dreams. 

 

When there are past or present traumas such as illnesses, losses, shameful events such as a relative who was convicted of a crime, or a suicide, they can have invisible but powerful effects on children. While certain facts and details are private and can remain secret, parents should be alert that somehow the child knows something. Increased anxiety, depression and acting out might be caused by picking up on a family legacy such as a shame or trauma. Unwittingly, a parent may pass along unconscious attitudes, attachment fears and other disturbances from their own unresolved feelings about the past. When a child encounters a mental health difficulty, parents should reflect on their own past experiences and how it may be affecting and bleeding over into the family emotional legacy and process.