Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
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Great People and Great Errors Kiddushin 63 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 18:47:36
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the injunction from Devarim (23:16): לֹא־תַסְגִּ֥יר עֶ֖בֶד אֶל־אֲדֹנָ֑יו אֲשֶׁר־יִנָּצֵ֥ל אֵלֶ֖יךָ מֵעִ֥ם אֲדֹנָֽיו "You shall not turn over to the master a slave who seeks refuge with you from that master." Although our Gemara darshens this verse differently, halakhically speaking, this verse is interpreted as a prohibition against returning a …
Proto-Torah Observance by the Ancients Kiddushin 62 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:46:28
Our Gemara on Amud Beis rules that conversion to Judaism requires a Bais Din of three Jewish judges. Conversion without this criterion is not valid. The Gemara (Sotah 12b) tells us that when the daughter of Pharaoh went to the Nile to bathe, she also wanted to cleanse herself of her family's idolatrous practices. We can either understand this to be how she merited to be the adoptive mother of Moshe, or she intuited that a holy destiny awaited her …
Beyond Forgiveness: The Power of Repentance Kiddushin 61 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:41:11
Our Gemara on amud beis raises various proofs to Rabbi Meir's position that legal conditions for them to be binding must have both the positive and negative clause enumerated. Thus, one must state, "If you do X, then I will grant Y." The Gemara raises a question from the verse where God instructs Cain (Bereishis 4:7): הֲל֤וֹא אִם־תֵּיטִיב֙ שְׂאֵ֔ת וְאִם֙ לֹ֣א תֵיטִ֔יב לַפֶּ֖תַח חַטָּ֣א …
Complementarity and Stability in Relationships Kiddushin 60 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:39:57
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph uses a metaphor to explain a structured legal process, likening it to a row of interleaved bricks. Rashi explains that in a wall of bricks, the second row is staggered so that the end points of each brick in the first row come out in the middle of bricks in the second row. This arrangement enhances stability. Otherwise, if a first brick on the wall's edge becomes loose, it could lead to the entire vertical row of first br …
Effort versus Trust in God Kiddushin 59 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:38:40
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the halakhic and moral injunctions against jumping the line and grabbing an item that another person resolved to acquire. A person who does so is labeled as wicked. Tosafos raises a contradiction based on a teaching in Bava Metzi’a (10a), where we learn that if someone sees a presumably ownerless object and falls upon it to acquire it, while another actually grabs it with his hands and acquires it. The hal …
The Tiniest Unquantified Amount of Spirituality Kiddushin 58 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:36:58
Our Gemara on amud beis discusses the dictum of Shmuel, which states that in order to release the obligation of Terumah from produce (which is forbidden to eat prior to taking off the Terumah, known as Tevel), even setting aside one grain of wheat for Terumah is sufficient. (Although the Rabbis required 1/60-1/40 as an appropriate gift to the Cohen.) The idea that a small grain of sanctification can accomplish so much becomes a launching point fo …
With Privilege Comes Responsibility Kiddushin 57 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 17:35:43
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, Rabbi Akiva's renowned derasha asserts that when the Torah adds ״את״ (es) to the commandment ״אֶת ה׳ אֱלֹהֶיךָ תִּירָא״, it obligates us to fear Torah sages as we fear God. The statement of Rabbi Akiva is that “Es”, comes to add an obligation to fear Torah sages as one fears God. Translating "es" into English is challenging, but it signifies an association, even when it seems obv …
Mixed Motives Kiddushin 56 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 11:21:50
Our Gemara in Amud Beis uses a derash to derive that mixed species in the vineyard are forbidden to benefit from. בְּכִלְאֵי הַכֶּרֶם מְנָלַן? אָמַר חִזְקִיָּה: אָמַר קְרָא: ״פֶּן תִּקְדַּשׁ״ – פֶּן תּוּקַד אֵשׁ. From where do we derive that one is prohibited from deriving benefit from diverse kinds in a vineyard? Ḥizkiyya said: The verse states: “You s …
Extralegal and Legal Actions and Intentions Kiddushin 55 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 11:21:40
Our Gemara on Amud Beis considers the moral and halakhic dilemma of what to do if by violating a minor prohibition, one can accomplish a great merit. Our Gemara discusses the case of an animal found in Yerushalayim, which is assumed to have been dedicated for a sacrifice. Since it is of unknown designation, it cannot be brought as is on the altar, as each sacrifice has different procedures. Redeeming a non-blemished animal is forbidden, but the t …
Avoiding Obsessing Over Mitzvos Kiddushin 54 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 11:21:32
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we encounter a compelling argument regarding the use of Temple vestments by a Cohen for personal purposes. The Gemara boldly states: "שֶׁלֹּא נִיתְּנָה תּוֹרָה לְמַלְאֲכֵי הַשָּׁרֵת." "The Torah was not given to the ministering angels." That is to say, since it would be impossible to calculate the precise moment when the service was finished, expecting the Cohen to immediatel …
Don't Hog a Mitzvah Kiddushin 53 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that the modest Cohanim would not enter the fray to grab a portion of the Lechem Hapanim, despite it being a mitzvah to eat. On a practical halakhic level, this teaching is used as a source and reminder that it does not bring honor to a mitzvah if you fight over it, as we can see in Baer Heytev OC 53:27. However, is this teaching so clear-cut? The Gemara (Yoma 39a) provides more detail to the story: In the times …
Memory vs. Analytical Skills Kiddushin 52 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us an interesting story about Rabbi Yehuda’s reaction to Rabbi Meir’s students: The Sages taught: After the death of Rabbi Meir, Rabbi Yehuda said to his students: Do not let the students of Rabbi Meir enter here into our house of study, because they are vexatious [kanteranim]. And they do not come to study Torah, but rather they come to overwhelm me with halakhos. Sumakhos, a student of Rabbi Meir, pushe …
Knowledge Versus Wisdom Kiddushin 51 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses an interlude where a sage, named Bar Ahina, explained to Rava how a certain law is derived from a verse. Apparently, this Bar Ahina had a knack for noticing scriptural derivations as we see in a different Gemara (Sotah 39b) that once again, Bar Ahina helps Rava understand a scriptural derivation. Akeidas Yitschok (65:1) uses this relationship as an object lesson from the dictum, “Who is a wise man? O …
Religion Without Resentment Kiddushin 50 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses that when someone prefers to bring an offering, if he wants to reneg, the Jewish court compels him to fulfill his pledge. However, since the verse (Vayikra 1:3) implies that it is brought with his will and intention, we force him until he verbalizes that he is “agreeing” and “wants” to bring the sacrifice. This is an interesting psychological domain of religious worship. On the one hand, …
Is “Marrying Up” Good For You? Kiddushin 49 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Daf 48 begins a discussion about a scenario where a woman was betrothed with a specific sum of money or another positive condition, and it turns out that she was given more money, an object of greater value, or a superior condition was met: מַתְנִיָּא: "הִתְקַדְּשִׁי לִי בְּכוֹס זֶה שֶׁל יַיִן" וְנִמְצָא שֶׁל דְּבַשׁ, "שֶׁל דְּבַשׁ" וְנִמְצָא שֶׁ …
How to Get Paid Faster Kiddushin 48 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud Aleph and Beis discusses how we view the obligation to pay a worker’s wages, and how it would affect a betrothal that was done via an agreement for the groom to perform a task as the exchange of an object of value: תַנְיָא: ״עֲשֵׂה לִי שִׁירִים נְזָמִים וְטַבָּעוֹת, וְאֶקַּדֵּשׁ אֲנִי לָךְ״, כֵּיוָן שֶׁעֲשָׂאָן – מְקוּדֶּשׁ …
Spiritual Food Kiddushin 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-29 00:00:00
This daf continues the halakhic discussion of betrothal using money forgiven from a loan. As we explained on Daf 46, a woman cannot be betrothed by allowing her to keep money she had previously borrowed. This is because the marriage bond needs to be effectuated via a transfer of a tangible object. The loan is not tangible, and even if the money was not spent and thus still tangible, the transfer of money to her domain occurred as a loan, and not …
A Historical Footnote on the Disputes of Shammai and Hillel Kiddushin 46 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the rule that a woman cannot be betrothed by allowing her to keep money she had previously borrowed. This is because the marriage bond needs to be effectuated via a transfer of a tangible object. The loan is not tangible, and even if the money was not spent and thus still tangible, the transfer of money to her domain occurred as a loan, and not an exchange for marriage. A second rule discussed is that if a woman …
Compliance is not the Same as Agreement Kiddushin 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a scenario where a daughter who is a minor accepts marriage in front of her father but without his explicit consent. The Gemara discusses what to make of his silence: is it assent or seething anger? This highlights an important aspect of human nature – a person can feel so trapped in a situation that he will externally comply while internally boiling with anger. As parents and educators, when we find oursel …
Not So Respectful Discourse Kiddushin 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph relates a scene that occurred in the Beis Midrash where Reish Lakish was screaming like a "cruchia" bird, and no one paid attention to his halakhic argument. What was this "cruchia" bird? Some translate it as a crane, which apparently makes a very loud cawing sound. However, Rashi here identifies it as an Agur. Elsewhere, an Agur bird is identified with a parrot (see Radak Yirmiyahu 8:7. Radak himself learns that "cruchia …
Repentance: The Ball is in your Court Kiddushin 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-25 00:00:00
In previous dappim, we learned that except in unusual circumstances, "אין שליח לדבר עבירה" (there is no agency when it comes to sin). That is to say, the one who carries out the act is fully liable since, as the Gemara says, "Whom does one obey, the master or the student?" In other words, God's law takes precedence, and there can never be an assignment of agency that contradicts God's command. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a …
Whose Orders Are We Following? Kiddushin 42 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-24 00:00:00
In our Gemara, we've been discussing the concept of agency, "shelichut." Several important principles have emerged: It is more honorable to perform a mitzvah oneself rather than appointing an agent, even if the mitzvah could technically be carried out by someone else. The concept of "Letikune Shidarticha" suggests that if an agent performs an action that clearly contradicts the appointer's intent, the agency is not valid for that particular ac …
Spiritual Dusting Off Before Shabbos Kiddushin 41 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses how great rabbis would personally tend to Shabbos preparations, even tasks that might be considered menial, to honor the sanctity of Shabbos: Rav Yosef said: It is more fitting that the mitzvah be performed by the person himself than by means of his agent. For example, there is a story of Rav Safra, who would singe the head of an animal on Shabbos eve himself to prepare it for consumption on Shabbos. Similarly, …
Unnatural Responses to Natural Temptations Kiddushin 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 11:21:21
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that if one successfully overcomes a particular temptation to sin, they will merit miraculous salvation. Ben Yehoyada explains that this is "Middah K'neged Middah," a measure for measure response from God. In other words, if we, as individuals, choose to forgo immediate gratification of our natural desires and drives for a higher spiritual purpose, God reciprocates by suspending natural laws and granting u …
Your Special Mitzvah Kiddushin 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-21 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis presents a cryptic concept, highlighting the potential power of just one mitzvah: Anyone who performs one mitzvah has goodness bestowed upon him, his life is lengthened, and he inherits the land, i.e., life in the World-to-Come. And anyone who does not perform one mitzvah does not have goodness bestowed upon him, his life is not lengthened, and he does not inherit the land of the World-to-Come. The Gemara goes on to explai …
Adjustment Period Kiddushin 38 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-20 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses how, on the day of Moses' passing, the Manna ceased, but the Jewish people continued to be sustained by the leftover Manna until the 16th of Nissan. Similarly, the Gemara mentions that the dough-cakes the Jews took from Egypt tasted like the Manna. Is the Gemara merely recounting historical events, or does it hold a deeper significance? Shem Mishmuel, in Shelach 10, offers an explanation that goes beyond histori …
Pour on the Effort Kiddushin 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-19 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, the discussion centers around whether the Jewish people in the wilderness were obligated to provide accompanying wine libations for their sacrifices, was required in the Temple. This inquiry seems to touch upon practicality, specifically the extent of effort the Torah expected from the Jews to procure wine for these libations in the harsh wilderness conditions. Indeed, though the Torah explicitly mentions that the Jews …
One-Sided Unconditional Love Kiddushin 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the intricate relationship between God and the Jewish people, particularly when the latter stray from their divine path: תַנְיָא: ״בָּנִים אַתֶּם לַה׳ אֱלֹהֵיכֶם״, בִּזְמַן שֶׁאַתֶּם נוֹהֲגִים מִנְהַג בָּנִים – אַתֶּם קְרוּיִם בָּנִים, אֵין אַתֶּם נוֹהֲגִים מִנְהַג בָּנִים &nd …
If You Believe That You Can Damage, Then Believe That You Can Fix Kiddushin 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the halakhic significance of female facial hair if it is considered like a beard. The matter is relevant regarding whether the laws of leprosy of the beard will apply to this area or the laws of skin leprosy, which have different criteria. The Gemara seems to consider the possibility that even though the verse explicitly includes female facial hair as part of the beard leprosy (Vayikra 13:29, "A man or woman who …
Giving Pregnant Women Their Due Kiddushin 34 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph questions the Mishna’s declaration of a general rule regarding women not being obligated in time-bound mitzvos: וּכְלָלָא הוּא? הֲרֵי מַצָּה, שִׂמְחָה, הַקְהֵל, דְּמִצְוַת עֲשֵׂה שֶׁהַזְּמַן גְּרָמָא, וְנָשִׁים חַיָּיבוֹת! וְתוּ: וַהֲרֵי תַּלְמוּד תּוֹרָה, פְּרִיָּה וּרְבִיָּה, …
The Beginning of Wisdom Kiddushin 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us why Rabbi Yochanan would stand up and honor a gentile, elderly person: רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן הֲוָה קָאֵי מִקַּמֵּי סָבֵי דְאַרְמָאֵי. אָמַר: כַּמָּה הַרְפַּתְקֵי עֲדוֹ עֲלַיְיהוּ דְּהָנֵי. רָבָא מֵיקָם לָא קָאֵי, הִידּוּר עָבֵד לְהוּ. Rabbi Yoḥanan himself would stand before Aramean, i. …
Things Are Not What They “Seam” Kiddushin 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us an interesting story about Rav Huna, who wanted to test his son and see how patient and respectful he could be, even when provoked. Rav Huna tore silk garments in front of his son to see if he would get angry. The Gemara asks a number of questions regarding the propriety of this challenge, but we will focus on one particular question and answer. The Gemara asks how it is permitted to tear a garment. Is this not a …
Unburdened Kiddushin 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-10-05 11:21:08
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph recounts the famous story of Dama Ben Nesina, serving as an object lesson for the extent to which one should go to honor one's parents. The rabbis visited Dama to purchase precious gems for the Cohen Gadol's breastplate. Unfortunately, the key to the chest containing the gems was safely tucked under his sleeping father's head. Despite being offered an exorbitant sum, Dama refused to wake his father, apparently believing t …
Reading Between the Lines Kiddushin 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the number of letters in the Torah and reports that the letter vav in the word גחון (Vayikra 11:42) is the midpoint of the Torah in terms of letters, and דרש דרש is the midpoint in terms of words (Vayikra 10:16). Since the word גחון has an even number of letters, the Gemara naturally inquires whether the letter vav belongs to the first half or the second half. Unable to resolve the question, the Ge …
Going Against the Tide Kiddushin 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph enumerates various obligations upon a father toward his son, including teaching him to swim. Rav Elyashiv (Divrei Aggadah, Devarim 14:9) asks, "Why did the rabbis specifically choose swimming when there must be many other hazards and skills to learn? Why not Mathematics to avoid being cheated or Self-defense in case of bandits?" Rav Elyashiv suggests that the Gemara chose swimming because of a double entendre. He explains …
Nipping Quarrels in the Bud Kiddushin 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-10 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, there's a crucial warning regarding the consequences of labeling a fellow Jew a "Rasha" (evil person): הָהוּא שַׁמּוֹתֵי מְשַׁמְּתִינַן לֵיהּ! דְּתַנְיָא: הַקּוֹרֵא לַחֲבֵירוֹ…. ״רָשָׁע״ – יוֹרֵד עִמּוֹ לְחַיָּיו! One who calls another a "wicked person" allows the insulted person to harass them in all aspects of l …
When Will You Trust Me Again? Kiddushin 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-08 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, we delve into the intricate process of "Gilgul Shevua," a unique legal procedure. When a defendant is obligated to make an oath to defend their claim, the plaintiff has the opportunity to levy additional accusations, compelling the defendant to take oaths on those matters as well. Remarkably, this applies even when the subsequent accusations lack substantial legal basis, drawing inspiration from the repetition of "Amen …
Pinpoint Analysis Kiddushin 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-08 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, a discussion arises regarding the concept of "kinyan agav karka," which pertains to the acquisition of movable property through the acquisition of land. The question at hand is whether the movable property must physically be present on the parcel of land being acquired: אִיבַּעְיָא לְהוּ: בָּעֵינַן צְבוּרִים, אוֹ לָא? אָמַר רַב יוֹסֵף: תָּא שְׁמַע: רַב …
Attuned Relationships Kiddushin 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we encounter an incident involving a group of elders from the city of Nezonya who declined to attend a Shiur (lecture) by Rav Chisda: סָבֵי דְנָזוֹנְיָא לָא אֲתוֹ לְפִירְקֵיהּ דְּרַב חִסְדָּא, אֲמַר לֵיהּ לְרַב הַמְנוּנָא: זִיל צַנְּעִינְהוּ. אֲזַל אֲמַר לְהוּ: מַאי טַעְמָא לָא אֲתוֹ רַבָּנ …
Trauma Response Kiddushin 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-06 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we explore a question regarding the status of a Canaanite slave who sustains injuries inflicted by his master. If these injuries affect an organ such as an eye, tooth, or other limb, the slave is automatically freed. However, the Gemara delves into a nuanced discussion regarding whether an injury to the slave's ear or eye caused by the master making a loud and frightening noise is considered a direct injury, which wou …
The Messenger is the Message Kiddushin 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into a recurring question throughout Shas concerning the status of the Cohanim's service in the Temple: When they offer sacrifices, are they acting as our representatives or as agents of God? The Gemara concludes that the Cohanim are indeed acting as agents of God, carrying out His directives (while, of course, one of those directives is to offer sacrifices on our behalf). Bas Ayin (Emor 23) expands on the role of a …
Misery Loves Company Kiddushin 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph teaches us that, although a Jewish slave often has the option to choose to continue his servitude after undergoing the ritual of having his ear pierced, there are certain situations where he will not be allowed to remain a slave under any circumstances. This is because the verse states, "I love my master" (Shemos 21:5), implying a state of relative equivalence and harmony between master and servant. Thus, the Gemara rules …
Lav at First Sight Kiddushin 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis initiates the discussion on the laws of Eishes Yefas Toar, a woman taken captive during war, and the permissibility of marrying her. Given the intense and primal urges that often emerge during the heat of battle, the Torah, rather than tolerating rampant sexual violence in wartime, outlines specific conditions under which a captive woman may be taken as a wife. The Sages taught: Concerning a captive, the verse states: "And …
Self Sacrifice vs Self Preservation Kiddushin 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the profound measures one must undertake to demonstrate respect and dignity towards their own slave: The passage continues: This means that there shall not be a situation in which you eat fine bread and he eats inferior bread [kibbar], bread from coarse flour mixed with bran, which is low quality. There shall not be a situation in which you drink aged wine and he drinks inferior new wine. There shall not be a …
Why Can’t You Just Move On? Kiddushin 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-09-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph addresses the exemption of a minor from capital punishment, even when they are the offender in an adultery case. Tosafos pose the question of why there should even be a debate, since minors are generally exempt from punishments. Tosafos in Arakhin (3a, "Limutei") suggest another line of thought, contemplating whether even a minor should be executed due to "Kalon," which can be translated as "disgrace." What precedent do T …
Male and Female Archetypes Kiddushin 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis engages in a fundamental debate regarding legal biblical exegesis. In the Tanach, Hebrew words are frequently spelled incompletely, accompanied by an oral tradition dictating their pronunciation. At times, the written and spoken forms yield distinct meanings, particularly with homonyms. The crux of the dispute lies in determining the primary source for deriving halakhic meaning. The Talmud employs an idiom to express this: …
Easy Does It Kiddushin 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph employs a proverb, stating, "If you try to grab too much, you will not grasp anything. If you grasp a measured amount, you will succeed in retaining it." This principle holds significant weight in human development and behavior. The inclination to undertake vast projects in a sweeping manner, especially during times of impatience and frustration with moral sentiments, is a common occurrence. However, drastic changes often …
Don’t Be Nile-istic Kiddushin 16 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the scenario of a Jew, due to poverty, selling himself as a slave to a gentile. Responsibility falls upon fellow Jewish brethren to redeem him from this spiritually detrimental environment. Tosafos and the Tosafos Harosh debate whether it would be permissible to employ subterfuge and trickery to redeem the Jewish slave if the asking price is unaffordable. In the leaflet "Misaviv Lashulkhan," Rav Elchanan Peret …
Relatively Free Kiddushin 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into the status of a Jewish slave redeemed by relatives. Rabbi Yose asserts that upon redemption, the slave gains freedom. In contrast, Rabbi Akiva contends that redemption by relatives results in the slave being bound to serve the relative until his contract ends. Even Rabbi Akiva acknowledges that redemption by a non-relative leads to complete freedom. (One could surmise that the act of charity from an outsider mi …
Serving With Honor Kiddushin 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-27 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis addresses the topic of the Jewish slave, discussing the requirement for a Jewish slave who chooses to extend his servitude beyond the prescribed six years to undergo a ritual that involves piercing his ear. The Gemara later on (22b) elaborates on the significance of this ritual: Rabban Yoḥanan ben Zakkai would expound this verse as a type of decorative wreath [ḥomer], i.e., as an allegory: Why is the ear different from …
Divorced From Reality Kiddushin 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the qualifications necessary for performing marriages and divorces. Due to their intricate nature and profound impact on the future lineage of multiple families, extra training and caution are required beyond standard Rabbinic expertise. Rav Yehuda, quoting Shmuel, asserts: "Anyone who does not know the nature of bills of divorce and betrothals should have no dealings in them," highlighting the potential for g …
Difficult Rabbinic Marriages Kiddushin 12 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis sheds light on an attempt by Yehudis, the wife of Rav Chiyya, to retroactively annul her marriage through a scheme. Although her plan ultimately failed, her actions raise questions about her circumstances and motivations. Fortunately, other Gemaras provide insight into her life: In Yevamos 65b, we learn that Yehudis had two sets of twins with extremely challenging pregnancies and labors. In fact, she successfully carried o …
All Parts Make the Whole Kiddushin 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the case of a slave with severe character flaws, such as being a thief or a "kubyostos". One might argue that the buyer is entitled to a refund, but the Gemara maintains that such character defects are common among slaves, making the purchase still valid. The term "kubyostos" is defined by Rashi as a kidnapper, and by Tosafos as a gambler. This derogatory term appears in two other Midrashim: one involving Yaak …
Rules About Exceptions Kiddushin 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-23 00:00:00
While no longer practiced and even already forbidden during the time of the Gemara (see 12b), one original method to establish a marriage bond was through sexual intercourse with the intention of consummation. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into this process and examines when exactly the marriage bond is formed: A question was posed to the Sages: Does the initiation of intercourse effect acquisition, or is it the completion of intercourse that e …
Dates Before Marriage Kiddushin 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-22 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, various scenarios are discussed where a man proposes marriage in a playful manner, leading to uncertainty about the woman's consent: "There was a certain man who was picking dates from a date tree. A certain woman came and said to him: 'Throw me two.' He said to her: 'If I throw two dates to you, will you be betrothed to me with them?' She said to him: 'Throw, throw.' Rav Zevid said: Any use of the expression: 'Throw, …
Disorders and Fate Kiddushin 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-21 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, Rav Kahana is mentioned and regarded as a "great man," emphasizing his practice of wearing a head covering. This practice reflects a broader discussion about the significance of head covering in Jewish tradition. A well-known Gemara in Shabbos (156b) touches on this topic: "From Rav Naḥman bar Yitzḥak it can also be derived that there is no Mazal (astrological influence) for the Jewish people. Chaldean astrologers …
Giving is Receiving Kiddushin 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph presents a novel perspective on the bond of marriage through the exchange of an object of value. Conventionally, marriage involves the groom giving an object of value to the bride with her consent. However, our Gemara introduces an unconventional scenario where, surprisingly, if the woman gives something, it is as if she is the one receiving. Specifically, if she bestows a gift upon a dignitary, someone whose acceptance o …
High Fidelity Kiddushin 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph raises a question about a grouping of similar items in a beraisa. There are six cases in total, and they are mostly similar. Yet, interestingly, they are divided into two sets of three cases: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: ״הֲרֵי אַתְּ אִשְׁתִּי״, ״הֲרֵי אַתְּ אֲרוּסָתִי״, ״הֲרֵי אַתְּ קְנוּיָה לִי״ – מְקוּדֶּשֶׁת. ״הֲרֵי אַ …
Objects are Closer than They Appear Kiddushin 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph uses a derasha from the verses that describe Jewish divorce to learn a methodology for accomplishing matrimony: אָמַר קְרָא: ״וְיָצְאָה״ ״וְהָיְתָה״ – מַקִּישׁ הֲוָיָה לִיצִיאָה: מָה יְצִיאָה בִּשְׁטָר – אַף הֲוָיָה נָמֵי בִּשְׁטָר. The verse states: “And she leaves his house and goes and becomes ano …
All the Resources of a Superpower Kiddushin 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us that the Hebrew word קִיחָה “Kicha” connotes acquisition to purchase, and not merely the acquisition of an ownerless object. Be’er Mayyim Chaim (Shemos 2:3) notes that the same Hebrew word is used when Yocheved “took” a reed basket to hide the baby Moshe. His understanding is that she acquired it via payment, much as we have a custom to make sure to acquire a Lulav or Hadass via …
Maid in Heaven Kiddushin 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis uses a verse regarding the Jewish maidservant to derive other forms of enactments that are accomplished via an exchange of an object of value, such as the marriage of a minor through the father’s acceptance: אָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב: דְּאָמַר קְרָא ״וְיָצְאָה חִנָּם אֵין כָּסֶף״ – אֵין כֶּסֶף לְאָדוֹן זֶה, אֲבָל יֵש …
Love vs Responsibility Kiddushin 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-16 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Aleph delineates three methods to accomplish betrothal (Kiddushin): Via an exchange of an object of value, via a written contract, or sexual intercourse. As we have remarked numerous times, the paradigm of marriage is used to explain a person’s relationship with God. Rav Yaakov Yosef Mipolnoe understands these three methods of accomplishing marriage as also representing three stages of man’s relationship with God. K …
Rabbi Akiva’s Perspective on Beauty Gittin 90 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-14 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Aleph discusses a fundamental three-way dispute regarding the permissibility of divorce: בֵּית שַׁמַּאי אוֹמְרִים, לֹא יְגָרֵשׁ אָדָם אֶת אִשְׁתּוֹ אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן מָצָא בָהּ דְּבַר עֶרְוָה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים כד), כִּי מָצָא בָהּ עֶרְוַת דָּבָר. וּבֵית הִלֵּל אוֹמְרִים, א …
Seeing is Feeling Gittin 89 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis introduces an intriguing idiom used to describe a precocious young child: "Flagos Reuven" (פלגות ראובן). This idiom finds its origin in a verse from the song of Devorah (Judges 5:15-16): "And the princes of Issachar were with Devorah, As Barak, so was Issachar— They rushed at his heels into the valley; Among the flagos of Reuven Were great decisions of heart. "Why did you stay among the sheepfolds, To hear …
Divine Empathy Gittin 88 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-11 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, we encounter a verse from Shemos (21:1): "וְאֵ֙לֶּה֙ הַמִּשְׁפָּטִ֔ים אֲשֶׁ֥ר תָּשִׂ֖ים לִפְנֵיהֶֽם׃" "These are the rules that you shall set before them." Be'er Mayim Chaim, in his commentary on this verse, draws attention to the phrase "before them." He notes that it would be more linguistically consistent to say "placing the rules upon them" instead. So, what is …
Taking Your Measurements Gittin 87 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into the practices of a group of scrupulous sages known as the "נקיי הדעת שבירושלים" or "those of pure intellectual and characterological disposition." In this context, the Gemara discusses their preference for using precise words and avoiding unnecessary elaboration, especially when dealing with legal matters like a divorce bill. Rather than adding the descriptor "witness," they simply sign their n …
Courier Pigeon Gittin 86 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a unique feature of the dove, which has halakhic implications: Rav Daniel bar Rav Katina raises a challenge: "All birds disqualify water of purification by drinking from it, because some of the water spills from the bird’s beak back into the basin after being disqualified by having been in the bird’s mouth. This is the halakha with regard to all birds except for the pigeon, because it sucks the water, …
Psychological Freedom Gittin 85 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-09 00:00:00
The Mishna on Amud Aleph defines the essential characteristic of a Get (Jewish bill of divorce): "You are hereby permitted to marry any man." Lomdishe discussions consider whether this single declaration is sufficient to effect the divorce or if there are two distinct elements involved: the legal transaction of giving over the document and the declaration within the document that finalizes the unencumbrance. While this may appear as a minute anal …
Thinking the Unthinkable Gittin 84 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-08 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph presents an intriguing dispute between Abaye and Rava concerning the validity of a condition in a get (bill of divorce). If the husband stipulates a condition that is impossible, the Get is valid even when the condition cannot be met. What about a condition that is technically possible but unthinkable,.such as "on the condition that you eat pig meat"? Abaye argues that the get is still valid because the condition is void, …
Halakhic Independence vs. Conservatism Gittin 83 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis engages in a discussion regarding posthumous challenges to the halakhic position of Rabbi Eliezer. Rabbi Yehoshua addresses the group of questioners, including himself, stating: "אֵין מְשִׁיבִין אֶת הָאֲרִי לְאַחַר מִיתָה" (One does not refute the opinion of a lion after his death). This expression emphasizes that even if compelling questions arise, we cannot be certain that Rabbi Eliez …
Conditional Conditions Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 82
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph and Beis discusses the dynamic of a Get given on a condition. Rav Shlomo Yosef Zevin in Resise Hegyonos (Parashas Re’eh) uses this Gemara to explain a Midrashic comment on the following verses (Devarim 11:26-27): רְאֵ֗ה אָנֹכִ֛י נֹתֵ֥ן לִפְנֵיכֶ֖ם הַיּ֑וֹם בְּרָכָ֖ה וּקְלָלָֽה׃ See, this day I set before you blessing and curse: אֶֽת־הַבּ …
Halakhic Reasoning and Myopic Dangers Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 81
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph engages in a discussion to determine what occurred to a wife of a Cohen who was taken captive. Rabbi Dosa does not assume she was raped even though she may have been molested in other ways: אָמַר רַבִּי דּוֹסָא: וְכִי מָה עָשָׂה לָהּ עַרְבִי זֶה? מִפְּנֵי שֶׁמִּיעֵךְ לָהּ בֵּין דַּדֶּיהָ, פְּסָלָהּ מִן הַכְּהוּנָּה?! …
The Get of Luban Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 80
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the importance of properly naming the city in the Get. This brings to mind an interesting slice of reality from about 100 years ago. In the Introduction to the eighth volume of the Iggeros Moshe, there is a biography of Rav Moshe that goes on for dozens of pages, and has the veracity of being written by his grandchildren. One of Rav Moshe’s first rabbinic positions was to serve as Rabbi of the town Luban. …
Marital Therapy and God Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 79
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-03 00:00:00
Our Mishna Amud Beis discusses a dispute between Beis Shammai and Beis Hillel regarding an “old Get”. An old Get is a Get that was written, but before it was given, the husband and wife were alone together. Beis Hillel is concerned that should they have momentarily reconciled, and then the Get was given sometime later, perhaps she got pregnant in between. If so, it would have the appearance of a child out of wedlock. Therefore, one sh …
Boundaries and Privacy Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 78
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-02 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, the discussion revolves around domains that are defacto considered personal, allowing the woman to acquire the Get even if she is technically still on her husband's property. One such location is analogous to the Babylonian equivalent of a pocketbook. Even if this item is on the ground (see Tosafos), and the ground belongs to the husband, it is understood to be designated for her personal use, enabling her to acquire …
Unconditional Love Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 77
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-08-01 00:00:00
Continuing our theme from yesterday, let us further explore the material related to the three weeks. In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we delve into the significance of the Get (divorce document) entering the wife's domain. If a husband places a Get in his courtyard with the intention of the wife acquiring it, it will not be valid, as he still owns the courtyard. Instead, he must physically place it into her hand. The verse in Yeshaiyahu (50:1) states …
Going Through the Motions Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 76
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into various scriptural formulae for conditional statements. One of the verses mentioned by Rashi ("Iycha") is from Yeshaiyahu (Isaiah 1:19). As we have recently concluded the three weeks of mourning for the destruction of the Beis HaMikdash and exile, let us carefully examine this verse: אִם־תֹּאב֖וּ וּשְׁמַעְתֶּ֑ם ט֥וּב הָאָ֖רֶץ תֹּאכֵֽלוּ׃ If, then, you agr …
Soft Start-Up Gittin 75 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis wrestles with a linguistic conundrum: how a man should phrase a condition in his Get, to be considered valid and executed a moment prior to his death, but not be activated should he survive. This was a common practice to protect people from falling to Yibum to a much younger brother who is not appropriate to marry: אֶלָּא אָמַר רָבָא: "אִם לֹא מַתִּי לֹא יְהֵא גֵּט, אִם מַתִּ …
Yes Does Not Mean Yes Gittin 74 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph describes various situations where a wife may be bashful to ask for payments or property promised to her, even though it rightfully belongs to her. While in some ways, female and male patterns of behavior have changed in modern times, it is important to respect that there are also patterns of behavior that remain feminine or masculine for many people. These patterns need to be respected and not ignored. Men and women have …
Do Not Be Too Smart Gittin 73 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph records Rava criticizing two sages for making an incorrect monetary halakhic ruling that erroneously benefited them, while presenting an unreasonable burden for the ferrymen with whom they made a deal. Rav calls Rav Pappa and Rav Huna, son of Rav Yehoshua, "White Geese." This is an odd epithet. Rashi says the white geese refer to their long white beards, as they were elders. There is some support for this peshat also from …
Doctor’s Orders Gittin 72 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses certain legal limitations to an agent. What is considered halakhically as a verbal directive cannot be delegated to an agent. For example, if a man sent another person to direct the scribe as his agent to write the get, such a directive is mere words, and that agent cannot appoint another agent. However, if a man appoints an agent to deliver an already written get to his wife, that agent can appoint another agen …
Healthy Assertiveness Gittin 71 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph employs a proof text from Psalms (38:14) to define the Hebrew words "Cheresh" as someone who is deaf and "Ilem" as a mute who does not speak: וַאֲנִ֣י כְ֭חֵרֵשׁ לֹ֣א אֶשְׁמָ֑ע וּ֝כְאִלֵּ֗ם לֹ֣א יִפְתַּח־פִּֽיו׃ "But I am like a deaf man, unhearing, like a dumb man who cannot speak up." In the face of mistreatment, the question arises: When is it proper to speak …
Health Benefits of Saffron and Talmudic Medicine Gittin 70 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-25 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, there is a discussion about an herb that appears to restore sexual vigor: אָמַר אַבָּיֵי: מִי שֶׁאֵינוֹ בָּקִי בְּדֶרֶךְ אֶרֶץ, לֵיתֵי שְׁלֹשָׁה קְפִיזֵי קוּרְטְמֵי דְחוֹחֵי, וְנֵידוּקִינְהוּ, וְנִישְׁלְקִינְהוּ בְּחַמְרָא וְנִישְׁתֵּי. אֲמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן: …
Change that is More than Skin Deep Gittin 69 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-24 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, a discussion revolves around a particular eye disease and its potential cure. Tosafos raises a contradiction between our Gemara and Bechoros (38b), where the latter categorizes this disease as a permanent blemish rather than a temporary one. The distinction lies in the fact that a temporary blemish does not render a sacrifice invalid nor allow for its redemption, while a permanent blemish does. (Instead, one must wait …
What We Have When We Have Nothing Gittin 68 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis recounts a period in Solomon's life when he was usurped by the Asmadai demon, who took his place, forcing Solomon into exile. The verse, "And this was my portion from all of my toil" (Ecclesiastes 2:10), raises a question: What is the meaning of the expression "And this"? The Gemara explains that this expression typically refers to an item that is actually in the person's hand or can be shown. Rav and Shmuel offer differen …
Performing Under Pressure: Cultivating Focus and Wisdom Gittin 67 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the virtues of various sages, including Rabbi Yehuda, who is peculiarly described as "wise when he wishes to be" (חָכָם לִכְשֶׁיִּרְצֶה). Rashi's interpretation of this phrase does not seem particularly praiseworthy, but to answer this, Tosafos adds that it implies Rabbi Yehuda can surpass Rabbi Meir (who was mentioned earlier) in wisdom when he puts in extra effort. So it is about Rav Yehu …
Only the Shadow Knows Gittin 66 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the distinction between a person and a demon by examining their shadows. While a person can cast a shadow and even have an additional shadow, a demon can only have one shadow, not two. What does this distinction truly mean? Casting shadows symbolizes having influence or indirect effects. In this light, a shadow of a shadow represents an even more indirect effect. Perhaps, the teaching suggests that demons are …
The Adolescent Brain and Torah Thought Gittin 65 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the stages of maturity and de-facto challenges the popular misconception that reaching the age of bar or bas mitzvah automatically grants full adulthood according to Jewish law. The rabbis recognized that maturity and judgment are not black-and-white distinctions, as evidenced by their ruling that individuals under the age of 20 do not possess the full capacity to sell inherited real estate. In addition, Gemar …
Marriage Roulette Gittin 64 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario where somebody sends a messenger to choose for him a woman to marry. This is not merely sending him to marry a specific woman, but actually trusting him to discern who would be a fitting wife and being empowered to enact the marriage on his behalf. This is the precise scenario that Avraham proposed to his trusted servant, Eliezer (see Bereishis 24). The Gemara rules that if the messenger dies, or we l …
Affirmative Inaction Gittin 63 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records a halakhic question that a number of Rabbis were unable to resolve. They then sent the message to Rabbi Chiya bar Abba, who also was not able to come to a clear answer. His response to them was: נִתְיַישֵּׁב בַּדָּבָר. We will consider the matter and then respond. The root of this Hebrew word is to sit or settle. Rav Chiya bar Abba said, “First, let us enter into a calm contemplative stat …
The True King Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 62
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a prohibition against excessively friendly greetings toward pagans, such as repeating a blessing of peace, as opposed to merely responding, which would be proper courtesy. However, Rav Kahana seemed to have a different practice: וְאֵין כּוֹפְלִין ״שָׁלוֹם״ לְגוֹי: רַב חִסְדָּא מַקְדֵּים וְיָהֵיב לְהוּ שְׁלָמָא. רַב כָּהֲנָא אֲמ …
Equanimity as a Moral and Psychological Attainment Gittin 61 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse from Mishlei (10:25): כַּעֲב֣וֹר ס֭וּפָה וְאֵ֣ין רָשָׁ֑ע וְ֝צַדִּ֗יק יְס֣וֹד עוֹלָֽם׃ "When the storm passes the wicked man is gone, But the righteous is an everlasting foundation." While there are various interpretations, the simple meaning of the verse suggests that the righteous possess a certain stability and are not disoriented or disrupted by th …
The Pedagogical Benefits of Leadership Gittin 60 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph presents the hierarchy of individuals called to the Torah: אַחֲרֵיהֶן קוֹרְאִין תַּלְמִידֵי חֲכָמִים הַמְמוּנִּין פַּרְנָסִים עַל הַצִּבּוּר, וְאַחֲרֵיהֶן תַּלְמִידֵי חֲכָמִים הָרְאוּיִין לְמַנּוֹתָם פַּרְנָסִים עַל הַצִּיבּוּר, וְאַחֲרֵיהֶן בְּנֵי תַּ …
Torah and Greatness in One Place Gittin 59 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph describes Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi as a unique combination of Torah knowledge and greatness. While the exact definition of greatness is not fully outlined, it appears to encompass attributes such as wealth, status, prestige, and wisdom. One manifestation of this combination is evident in the special relationship between Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi and a Roman official named Antoninus. The Gemara in Avodah Zara (10b) documents their lo …
Stubborn Conviction Gittin 58 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-13 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we encounter a story that portrays an unusually callous and cruel fate suffered by some of the youth after the fall of Jerusalem to the Romans. It is based on the ancient belief that conceiving a child while beholding aesthetically pleasing images would result in beautiful offspring. The noble Romans would have attractive images placed by their bedsides for this purpose. Interestingly, this belief is also present in J …
Bizarre Punishments and Their Meaning Gittin 57 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-12 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we encounter the description of the afterlife punishments for three infamous evildoers: Bilaam, Titus, and Yoshka. Bilaam was destined to be boiled in semen, Yoshka was fated to suffer in boiling excrement, and Titus received the punishment of being ground and burned to dust. These punishments are difficult to understand literally, so let us delve into their symbolic meaning. The Maharal provides an explanation (Netza …
Just Following Orders Gittin 56 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-11 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we encounter the poignant story of Kamtza, who was humiliated and expelled from a party while the sages remained silent. Seeking revenge, Kamtza hatched a plan to make the government believe that the rabbis were rebelling. To provide evidence, he intentionally caused a minor injury to the eye or lip of an animal designated for sacrifice. Although this was not an obvious blemish, it rendered the sacrifice invalid accor …
Facilitating Repentance Without Enabling Moral Laxity Gittin 55 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-10 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, a discussion arises regarding a Rabbinic dispensation made to facilitate the repentance of a thief. According to biblical law, if a person steals something and the stolen object remains intact, it must be returned to its original owner. However, if the object has significantly changed or has been lost or destroyed, the thief is obligated to provide monetary compensation. This creates a dilemma for a thief who has stol …
Holy Matrimony Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 54
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the unique ritual on Yom Kippur when the Cohen Gadol enters the Holy of Holies. The verse states (Vayikra 16:17): וְכׇל־אָדָ֞ם לֹא־יִהְיֶ֣ה ׀ בְּאֹ֣הֶל מוֹעֵ֗ד בְּבֹא֛וֹ לְכַפֵּ֥ר בַּקֹּ֖דֶשׁ עַד־צֵאת֑וֹ וְכִפֶּ֤ר בַּעֲדוֹ֙ וּבְעַ֣ד בֵּית֔וֹ וּבְעַ֖ד כׇּל־קְהַ֥ל יִשְׂר …
Distinctions Between Rabbinic and Torah Law Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 53
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a judicial concept of damage inflicted that is not visible, such as rendering Teruma food impure (טמאה). The damage is invisible and may not technically incur a legal financial penalty, but the rabbis imposed a financial fine nonetheless. This is because allowing such damage to go unpunished could lead to people vandalizing others' Teruma with impunity. Within this discussion, there is a subset concerning the …
Prophetic Dreams and Their Limitations Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 52
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a situation where Rabbi Meir made a halakhic ruling, but then was confronted in a dream that he was an error. He stuck to his original logical analysis, and disregarded his dream: הָהוּא אַפּוֹטְרוֹפּוֹס דַּהֲוָה בְּשִׁבָבוּתֵיהּ דְּרַבִּי מֵאִיר, דַּהֲוָה קָא מְזַבֵּין אַרְעָתָא וְזָבֵין עַבְדֵי, וְלָא …
The Process of Realizing the Truth Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 51
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the psychology of why there is an obligation to make an oath when there is partial admission, even though if there is total denial, there is no obligation. At first glance, this does not make sense. Why did somebody who is decent enough to make a partial admission be less credible than a person who totally denies? But of course, human behavior does not follow logic; it also follows emotions. Therefore, the reason …
Intuition Versus Logic Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 50
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph delves into the complex topic of guarantees in Jewish monetary law. It presents a scenario where a person who volunteers as a guarantor on a kesuba (marriage contract) is exempted from financial responsibility. Typically, a guarantor assumes a commitment due to their respected and wealthy status (See Bava Basra 173b where the prestige of becoming a guarantor and the exchange of money creates an obligation based on receipt …
Unconventional Justice: The Case of the Temple Ox Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 49
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-04 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph examines the unique and counterintuitive status of an ox that belongs to the Temple. The verse in question is Shemos 21:35: "When one person's ox injures another's, so that it dies, they shall sell the live ox and divide its price; they shall also divide the dead animal." The term "רעהו" or "neighbor" emphasizes a peer-to-peer relationship, indicating that there is no financial liability when causing damage to possess …
We Shape Our Own Heaven or Hell Psychology of the Daf Yomi Gittin 48
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into the matter of payment and the varying forms it can take depending on the nature and circumstances of the obligation. It teaches us that someone who causes damage and is required to pay from their land assets must pay from the best of their land. However, a debtor who utilizes land may use land of medium quality. In a metaphorical and spiritual sense, mystics discuss how one should perceive sin and its consequen …
Reish Lakish and the Cannibals Gittin 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-07-02 00:00:00
The amazing narrative of Reish Lakish's encounter with cannibals, as recounted in our Gemara on Amud Aleph, presents an intriguing tale that warrants deeper exploration: רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ זַבֵּין נַפְשֵׁיהּ לְלוּדָאֵי שְׁקַל בַּהֲדֵיהּ חַיְיתָא וְגֻלְגֻּלְתָּא אֲמַר גְּמִירִי דְּיוֹמָא בָּתְרָא כֹּל דְּבָעֵי מִינַּיְ …
Pathological Debt Gittin 46 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-30 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, we encounter a compelling narrative involving a family trapped in a cycle of accumulating debts due to their habitual and negligent financial management. The dire consequences of their actions resulted in their captivity at the hands of gentile creditors. Although redeeming captives is generally considered a supreme mitzvah, the sages, in this case, declined to intervene due to their perception of the family as neglige …
Mutually Reinforcing Misery Gittin 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses who should be penalized in a situation where an ethically improper transaction is performed, such as when a Canaanite slave is sold outside of the land of Israel (as we saw in Psychology of the Daf, Gittin 44). Specifically, should the buyer be penalized or the seller? The Gemara uses a clever metaphor: Who steals the food? The mouse or the hole? This metaphor speaks to the psychological and behavioral pattern o …
Portable Homeland of the Jewish People Gittin 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-29 00:00:00
The Mishna on 43b teaches us that a Jewish master who sells his slave to live outside of Israel is fined by the Rabbis and compelled to set him free. This indicates the Rabbis' recognition of the significant disruption to the spiritual life of the slave when forced to live outside of Israel. It is noteworthy that even the spiritual well-being of a slave is held in high regard. Additionally, the Mishna states that if a Jewish master sells his slav …
In Order to Succeed, Fail Gittin 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph offers a profound insight into human nature and the necessary role of failure: "אֵין אָדָם עוֹמֵד עַל דִּבְרֵי תוֹרָה אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן נִכְשָׁל בָּהֶן" "A person does not understand statements of Torah unless he stumbles in them." Failure is often feared due to the innate instinct of self-recrimination triggered by falling short. While this instinct serves a purpos …
What Kind of Suffering Merits Forgiveness? Gittin 42 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into the sources and specific laws concerning the automatic release of a Canaanite slave whose master causes him to lose a limb. While the scripture mentions a tooth or eye, the halakhic interpretation extends it to any limb (See Shemos 21:27). Sefer Daf Al Daf presents an insightful derush and analysis of Aggadah by Rav Tzvi Pesach Frank (Vaera 6:5). When Moshe expresses concern over the continued suffering of the …
Sexuality Beyond Procreation Gittin 41 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-26 00:00:00
Our Mishna, spanning from Amud Aleph to Amud Beis, delves into the quandary faced by an individual who is half-slave and half-freeman due to being emancipated by only one of their two owners. Bais Shammai argues before Beis Hillel that the other owner must be compelled to free the individual, as his current status prevents him from marrying a regular free Jewish woman or a Canaanite servant. This predicament, impeding the individual from leading …
Intention and Action: Understanding the Legal and Divine Perspectives Gittin 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-25 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, we explore the intentions and legal implications of phrases such as "I will give" in contracts. We examine whether the use of future tense expresses intention or signifies full acquisition and relinquishment. This discussion provides important insights into a perplexing verse and the dialogue between God and Moses in Shemos (6:1-2). Yismach Moshe (Vaera 1) offers this legal distinction to understand the dialogue betwee …
Perspectives and Humility: Unraveling Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi's Expression Gittin 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-23 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis, there is a phrase quoted that is used almost exclusively by Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi, the Compiler of the Mishna. Rabbi Rosner's recorded Daf Yomi Shiur on this daf from the previous cycle brought attention to this unique usage (אומר אני). Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi introduces his halakhic argument with the phrase "I say." Unlike other Tannaim and Amoraim, he uniquely employs this expression (see Meleches Shlomo, Mishna Ara …
The Practical and Human Aspects of War Gittin 38 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-23 00:00:00
The Gemara discusses the concept of the acquisition of slaves via the spoils of war. Some of the commentaries understand it as an advanced form of yiyush, that is, the owners, seeing the overwhelming enemy give up and relinquish their hopes of reacquiring the item. Therefore, de facto, the conquerors take possession (see Rashi Bechazaka). From other Rishonim (see Tosafos 38a, “Aval,” and Rashba Kiddushin 14a) it seems that warfare its …
Giving as a Form of Receiving Gittin 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph notes a textual anomaly in the verse that describes the Mitzvah for the creditor to return the collateral to the borrower when he needs to use it for basic living. The verse states (Devarim 24:14): הָשֵׁב֩ תָּשִׁ֨יב ל֤וֹ אֶֽת־הַעֲבוֹט֙ כְּב֣וֹא הַשֶּׁ֔מֶשׁ וְשָׁכַ֥ב בְּשַׂלְמָת֖וֹ וּבֵֽרְכֶ֑ךָּ וּלְךָ֙ תִּהְיֶ֣ה צְד …
Corporal Punishment and Jewish Pedagogy Gittin 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph recounts an incident where a rebbe was removed from his position because he was "negligent." Rashi explains, "he beat them more than necessary." Rashi's choice of words indicates that the problem was not that he hit the children, per se, but that he beat them too much. Let us discuss some modern and ancient Jewish and halakhic perspectives regarding corporal punishment of children. While parents have been using corporal p …
The Mechanisms of Rationalization Gittin 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the issue of trust in a widow who cares for her husband's children and whether she can be relied upon to take an oath about receiving payment from her husband's kesuba. There is a concern that she may rationalize her entitlement to funds beyond what she deserves and even resort to false swearing. Rashi explains that she genuinely believes she is not stealing but rather taking additional compensation that she fee …
Better than Before Gittin 34 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses an instance where a man seems to express a change of heart regarding divorce, but his language is unclear: גִּידּוּל בַּר רְעִילַאי שַׁדַּר לַהּ גִּיטָּא לִדְבֵיתְהוּ אֲזַל שְׁלִיחָא אַשְׁכְּחַהּ דַּהֲוָה יָתְבָה וְנָוְולָה אֲמַר לַהּ הֵא גִּיטִּיךְ אֲמַרָה לֵיהּ זִיל הַשְׁתָּא …
Poetic Justice Gittin 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses one of the most unusual executive powers accorded to the Rabbis of the Sanhedrin to enforce certain critical social norms and functioning. There are times where they are able to annul a marriage that would technically still be binding according to strict Torah law (though poskim debate the lomdus of the exact halakhic mechanism). In order to allow for the smooth functioning of society, certain overrides were put …
Sadistic Divorce Gittin 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis considers a scenario where a husband appears to be canceling an agent who he sent to deliver a Get, but perhaps he is not really canceling, but only somehow sadistically teasing his soon-to-be ex-wife by pretending to renege on the agreement: גְּמָ׳ הִגִּיעוּ לָא קָתָנֵי אֶלָּא הִגִּיעַ וַאֲפִילּוּ מִמֵּילָא וְלָא אָמְרִינַן לְצַעוֹרַהּ ה …
Messianic Times and Climate Change Gittin 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the "four winds" and their role in the physical and spiritual climate. אֲמַר לְהוּ: הָכִי אָמַר רַב חָנָן בַּר רָבָא, אָמַר רַב: אַרְבַּע רוּחוֹת מְנַשְּׁבוֹת בְּכׇל יוֹם, וְרוּחַ צְפוֹנִית מְנַשֶּׁבֶת עִם כּוּלָּן; שֶׁאִלְמָלֵא כֵּן, אֵין הָעוֹלָם מִתְקַ …
Post-Nuptial Agreements and Conditional Divorce Gittin 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-15 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, a scenario is discussed where a man provides a Get (bill of divorce) with the condition that he appease his wife within thirty days. However, despite his efforts, she remains unappeased. Rav Yosef questions whether the man needed to give her an exorbitant gift in order to appease her, suggesting that fulfilling the condition does not require extreme measures. This viewpoint asserts that the divorce is valid because th …
Rewarding Discussion: The Paradox of Physical Existence and Spiritual Rewards Gittin 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-14 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we delve into a concept related to agency and delegation. Rava asserts that verbal instructions cannot be delegated to an agent, citing the Mishna as an example. The Mishna explains that in the case of a bill of divorce, the husband's verbal instructions cannot be passed on to another agent. Verbal directives, it seems, cannot be effectively transferred through agency. This principle is known as "מילי לא …
Dying to Live Gittin 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph engages in a discussion regarding statistical trends in aging and longevity, which hold Halakhic implications concerning the assumption of a husband's survival by the time a Get (divorce document) arrives through a messenger. The Gemara states: "And if you wish, say that this is not a conclusive refutation. In the case of the baraisa, since it is so that the man reached an exceptionally old age, one cannot apply the gener …
Merit Badge Gittin 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis delves into the discussion of whether certain signs, known as simanim, are powerful enough identifiers to be relied upon in matters pertaining to Torah law. Rav Ashi states the following: If there is a hole in a specific location next to a particular letter in a bill of divorce, which serves as a distinct and prominent distinguishing mark for the owner. The Gemara, in Bava Metzia 28a, derives the concept of simanim (distin …
Anger Management Gittin 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis, Rabbi Meir's opinion is discussed, stating that signatory witnesses on a bill of divorce are the ones who effectuate the divorce. According to Rabbi Meir, it would technically be permissible to write the essential identifying information of the bill of divorce in advance. However, this practice was not followed due to concerns about quarreling, referred to as "Kettata" in the Gemara. אָמְרִי לַהּ ר …
The Toxicity of Divorce Threats Gittin 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-09 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we discuss a specific type of incomplete divorce document known as "aroma of a Get" (ריח גט). Although these documents are not legally binding and do not result in a valid divorce, they still have implications. A Cohen, for example, would be prohibited from marrying the woman even though she is not officially divorced. Most Rishonim, except for the Rambam, understood this prohibition to be of biblical origin (see …
Rachel's Test Gittin 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-09 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis teaches: If a man has two wives with identical names and he writes a bill of divorce intending to divorce the older one but then changes his mind, he may not use that bill to divorce the younger one. The Hon Ashir in the Mishna notes that the description of a case where the bill is written to divorce the older wife, rather than the reverse scenario or wives of the same age, is essentially unnecessary. However, the Mishna p …
Blindsight is 20/20 Gittin 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-08 00:00:00
In our discussion on Amud Aleph, there is a dispute between Rav Sheshes and Rav Yosef regarding the qualification of a blind person to serve as a messenger for delivering a Get (bill of divorce). The Gemara explores various reasons for disqualifying a blind person, including the inability to testify accurately due to not knowing the parties involved. However, Rav Yosef challenges this argument by pointing out that a blind person can recognize oth …
Parental Guidance Suggested Gittin 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-07 00:00:00
On this Daf, there are two seemingly unrelated passages that can be metaphorically related to prayer and spirituality. Let's examine each teaching both in its literal halakhic sense and its allegorical meaning. In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, there is a discussion about a pot whose roots extend through a hole into the land of Israel, while all the branches are outside the land. The question arises: What is the status of the fruits, and are they obli …
Divorce Narrative Gittin 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis explains that unlike the bond of marriage, which can be established through various means as outlined in the first Mishna of Kiddushin, divorce can only be achieved through a written bill. This is derived from the verse that refers to it as a "scroll of severance" (ספר כריתות). Interestingly, the word "sefer" (scroll) is related to the word "story," suggesting that there is a narrative within the Get (divorce docu …
Hiddur Mitzvah as a Requirement Gittin 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-05 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Aleph, we learn about a specific mistake that can occur when writing the Tetragrammaton in a Sefer Torah and the circumstances under which it can be corrected: The baraisa teaches: If a scribe writing a Torah scroll reaches a point where he needs to write the name of God, spelled yod, heh, vav, heh, but instead intends to write "Yehuda," spelled yod, heh, vav, dalet, heh, and mistakenly omits the dalet, inadvertently writing …
Reading Between the Lines Gittin 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph refers to writing with gall nut ink, on top of parchment treated with gall nut ink. Since they are of the same substance and the writing does not leave a visible impression, the writing is not considered valid. The Shalah (Shenei Luchos HaBers Shaar HaOsiyos Emes Ve'Emunah.6) understands this in a metaphysical way as well. The Yigdal poetic version of the Rambam’s 13 Principles of Faith describes the third principle …
Umbrella Policy Gittin 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph references the metaphysical idea that one does not do actions (or even say things) that hasten painful or disturbing events. Thus the Gemara later on 75b says if one is giving a Get on a stipulation that he dies (so as to protect his wife from falling to Yibum), the stipulations should reference “if I live” first, and then mention the other conditional clause about what happens should he die. This is so as not …
The Ups and Downs of Exile Gittin 16 and 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-06-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on 16b and 17a tells us a story about how Rav Yehuda and Rabba visited Rabba bar bar Ḥana when he was unwell. רַבָּה בַּר בַּר חָנָה חֲלַשׁ, עוּל לְגַבֵּיהּ רַב יְהוּדָה וְרַבָּה, לְשַׁיּוֹלֵי בֵּיהּ. בְּעוֹ מִינֵּיהּ: שְׁנַיִם שֶׁהֵבִיאוּ גֵּט מִמְּדִינַת הַיָּם, צְרִיכִין שֶׁיּ …
Dying to Be Heard Gittin 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the ethical and legal concept of a מִצְוָה לְקַיֵּים דִּבְרֵי הַמֵּת It is a mitzvah to fulfill the directives of the dead. There are halakhic discussions over what extent it is legally binding, and under what circumstances, but there also seems to be some consensus that, regardless of the legality, there is a moral obligation to fulfill the wishes of the deceased. Why is this so? Th …
Intuitive Truth Versus Logical Truth Gittin 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-30 00:00:00
Our gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a certain law as “a halakha without a reason”. The Aramaic word used is, “Hilkhesa”, which is also used to mean a Halakha LeMoshe Misinai, an oral legal tradition that is part of an ancient chain of teachings, even stemming back to Moshe. It is notable that Rashi understands this use of the word “Hilkhesa” to literally mean Halakha LeMoshe Misinai. Rashi’s explanat …
Authentic Freedom Gittin 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-29 00:00:00
Authentic freedom is a complex concept that has been debated by philosophers and theologians for centuries. Authentic freedom includes the ability to make one's own choices, the absence of coercion or oppression, and the pursuit of one's own values and goals. Our gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the psychological and halakhic concept of עַבְדָּא בְּהֶפְקֵירָא נִיחָא לֵיהּ for a slave. Becoming free is not necessarily …
Do We Have the Right to Argue with God? Gittin 12 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses practical and legal dimensions of slave ownership, responsibilities of slave to master and master to slave. However, there are also ways to read them as derash, hinting at our experiences as slaves in Egypt. Let us look at each teaching, and then see if they are allusions to our own slavery: ! עַבְדָּא דִּנְהוֹם כְּרֵסֵיהּ לָא שָׁוֵיא, לְמָרֵיהּ וּלְמָר …
A Vered by Any Other Name Gittin 11 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-25 14:11:25
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses Jews who have names of Gentiles. It is a known halakhic and moral debate about the practice of choosing Gentile names. Different communities have different customs and that will not be the focus of our discussion. But there is a fascinating Midrash about the history and process of Jewish names. It states in Bereishis Rabbah 37:7: A dispute between Rabbi Yose and Rabbi Shimon Ben Gamliel. Rabbi Yose says: The anc …
Baal Teshuva Syndrome Gittin 10 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-25 14:11:08
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the status of Matzah baked by Cuthite. According to this Gemara, though this nationality converted to Judaism under duress, the conversion was still valid, and they had the status of Jews. However, the Cuthites didn’t quite absorb the full message of Judaism and often would follow the written Torah but not trust the Rabbinic oral tradition. According to one opinion, even though of course, we are stri …
Silent Rebuke Gittin 9 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph reports that Rabbi Yosei would use the following verse in Mishley (24:26) to praise cogent Torah arguments: שְׂפָתַ֥יִם יִשָּׁ֑ק מֵ֝שִׁ֗יב דְּבָרִ֥ים נְכֹחִֽים׃ Giving straightforward reply Is like giving a kiss. How is a lucid torah argument compared to a kiss? Rashi on our Gemara says it is worthy of a kiss. Tosafos explains that it is not the kiss itself, but rather the g …
Another Way to Make Aliyah Gittin 8 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a fascinating legal enactment in order to promote settlement of the land of Israel. Even though ordinarily, one may not instruct a gentile to perform labor on Shabbos, if there’s an opportunity to purchase a parcel of land in Israel, from a gentile, you can instruct a secular court to write up the contract. While some poskim have used this as a general principle, allowing one to instruct a gentile to perfor …
Being Amongst the People Gittin 7 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-23 00:00:00
OurGemara on 6b and 7a tells us about how to give instruction and guidance during the hectic time preceding the arrival of Shabbos: אָמַר רַבָּה בַּר בַּר חָנָה: הָא דְּאָמְרִי רַבָּנַן: שְׁלֹשָׁה דְּבָרִים צָרִיךְ אָדָם לוֹמַר בְּתוֹךְ בֵּיתוֹ עֶרֶב שַׁבָּת עִם חֲשֵׁיכָה: עִשַּׂרְתֶּם? עֵרַבְתֶּם? ה …
Too Much of a Good Thing? Gittin 6 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the opinion of Shmuel that Babylonia is considered outside of Israel and a Get needs the messenger to attest to the signatures. Shmuel holds that though due to the constant traffic to and from the yeshivos in Israel to Bavel, there ought to be sufficient witnesses who could attest to the signatures on the Get, the Benei Yeshiva are engrossed in their studies and nonetheless would not recognize signatures. …
Sometimes the Details Count Gittin 5 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the consequences of diverging from the formula that the sages instituted for process of divorce. Rabbi Meir has an opinion that once the Rabbis Instituted a particular process, even if details of the process are rabbinic in origin, a divorcement bill that does not in here to this process is rendered invalid. This is even to the extent that the divorce is ineffective, and a child from a subsequent union would be c …
Season’s Greetings Gittin 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis strongly implies that there is no mitzvah of Aliyyah Leregel (Yom Tov Pilgrimage) in our times where there is no Bais HaMikdash: תִּינַח בִּזְמַן שֶׁבֵּית הַמִּקְדָּשׁ קַיָּים בִּזְמַן שֶׁאֵין בֵּית הַמִּקְדָּשׁ קַיָּים מַאי אִיכָּא לְמֵימַר The Gemara raises a difficulty: This works out well when the Temple is standin …
Spiritual Credit Score Gittin 3 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-19 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses circumstances when a single witness is believed. Specifically this is in regard to testifying about the permissibility of a food or similar ritualry requirement. אֵימַר דְּאָמְרִינַן עֵד אֶחָד נֶאֱמָן בְּאִיסּוּרִין כְּגוֹן חֲתִיכָה סָפֵק שֶׁל חֵלֶב סָפֵק שֶׁל שׁוּמָּן דְּלָא אִיתַּ …
The Quest for Satisfaction Gittin 2 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis identifies the people of “Medinas Hayam” those who come from overseas (from outside the Land of Israel) as tending to be less versed in Torah law and norms (see Rashi “Lefi”.) The idiom, Medinas Hayam is often used in rabbinic literature to denote an area that is lacking in Torah or spiritual significance. Rav Kook, in his commentary on Siddur (Olas Reiyyah) goes into a lengthy metaphorical and myst …
Factors That Create Receptivity Toward Criticism Sotah 49 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis laments the state of the world prior to arrival of the Mashiach, including the inability to to accept rebuke: בְּעִקְבוֹת מְשִׁיחָא חוּצְפָּא יִסְגֵּא וְיוֹקֶר יַאֲמִיר הַגֶּפֶן תִּתֵּן פִּרְיָהּ וְהַיַּיִן בְּיוֹקֶר וּמַלְכוּת תּהָפֵךְ לְמִינוּת וְאֵין תּוֹכַחַת בֵּית וַועַד …
Demons that Dog Your Marriage Sotah 48 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis notes that the crumbling of a home begins at the gate, and Rav Ashi was even able to see this force personified in a vision of a particular demon: אָמַר רַב אָשֵׁי שְׁמַע מִינַּהּ כִּי מַתְחֵיל חוּרְבָּא בְּסִיפָּא מַתְחֵיל שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר חֹרֶב בַּסַּף וְאִיבָּעֵית אֵימָא מֵהָכָא וּשְׁאִיָּה יֻכַּ …
Love Bombing Sotah 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the way in which arrogant men at first charm women during courtship but eventually disappoint: מִשֶּׁרַבּוּ הַיְּהִירִים הִתְחִילוּ בְּנוֹת יִשְׂרָאֵל לְהִנָּשֵׂא לִיהִירִים שֶׁאֵין דּוֹרֵינוּ רוֹאֶה אֶלָּא לַפָּנִים From the time when haughty people proliferated, the daughters of Israel began marrying ha …
Human Potential Sotah 46 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph laments the loss of potential in the wake of a seemingly random, senseless murder. אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן בֶּן שָׁאוּל מִפְּנֵי מָה אָמְרָה תּוֹרָה הָבֵיא עֶגְלָה בְּנַחַל אָמַר הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא יָבֹא דָּבָר שֶׁלֹּא עָשָׂה פֵּירוֹת וְיֵעָרֵף בִּמְקוֹם שֶׁ …
Taking Your Measurements as a Leader Sotah 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud aleph discusses the ritual of the unsolved murder. The verses state in the beginning of Devarim 21: כִּי־יִמָּצֵ֣א חָלָ֗ל בָּאֲדָמָה֙ אֲשֶׁר֩ ה׳ אלקיך נֹתֵ֤ן לְךָ֙ לְרִשְׁתָּ֔הּ נֹפֵ֖ל בַּשָּׂדֶ֑ה לֹ֥א נוֹדַ֖ע מִ֥י הִכָּֽהוּ׃ If, in the land that your God gives you as an inheritance a fallen corpse sh …
Build Your Boundaries Before Marriage Sotah 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the appropriate order of development to prepare for marriage: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן אֲשֶׁר בָּנָה אֲשֶׁר נָטַע אֲשֶׁר אֵרַשׂ לִימְּדָה תּוֹרָה דֶּרֶךְ אֶרֶץ שֶׁיִּבְנֶה אָדָם בַּיִת וְיִטַּע כֶּרֶם וְאַחַר כָּךְ יִשָּׂא אִשָּׁה וְאַף שְׁלֹמֹה אָמַר בְּח …
The Three Stages of Providence Sotah 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the process of announcements made by the Cohen prior to battle, where those persons who may lack courage due to sin or distractions back at home are exempted from the battlefield. The verses state (Devarim 20:3-9): וְאָמַ֤ר אֲלֵהֶם֙ שְׁמַ֣ע יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל אַתֶּ֨ם קְרֵבִ֥ים הַיּ֛וֹם לַמִּלְחָמָ֖ה עַל־אֹיְבֵיכֶ֑ם אַל־יֵ …
No Room for Truth, No Room for God Sotah 42 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud aleph discusses fours classes of people whose behavior leads to an alienation from the Shekhina: אָמַר רַבִּי יִרְמְיָה בַּר אַבָּא: אַרְבַּע כִּיתּוֹת אֵין מְקַבְּלוֹת פְּנֵי שְׁכִינָה: כַּת לֵיצִים, וְכַת חֲנֵיפִים, וְכַת שַׁקָּרִים, וְכַת מְסַפְּרֵי לָשׁוֹן הָרָע. Rabbi Yirmeya bar A …
Even the Fetuses Have Contempt Sotah 41 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the ethical and characterological problem of flattering sinners: וְאָמַר רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר: כׇּל אָדָם שֶׁיֵּשׁ בּוֹ חֲנוּפָּה — אֲפִילּוּ עוּבָּרִין שֶׁבִּמְעֵי אִמָּן מְקַלְּלִין אוֹתוֹ, And Rabbi Elazar says: Any person who has flattery in him, even fetuses in their mothers’ wombs curse him …
How the Vest Was Won Sotah 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph explains a dress code for the Cohanim when they go up to bless the congregation: דְּאֵין הַכֹּהֲנִים רַשָּׁאִין לַעֲלוֹת בְּסַנְדְּלֵיהֶן לַדּוּכָן. וְזֶהוּ אַחַת מִתֵּשַׁע תַּקָּנוֹת שֶׁהִתְקִין רַבָּן יוֹחָנָן בֶּן זַכַּאי …שֶׁמָּא נִפְסְקָה לוֹ רְצוּעָה בְּ …
Being Quiet is Different than Listening Sotah 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses two proof texts for the requirement to be silent when the Torah is being read. אָמַר רָבָא בַּר רַב הוּנָא כֵּיוָן שֶׁנִּפְתַּח סֵפֶר תּוֹרָה אָסוּר לְסַפֵּר אֲפִילּוּ בִּדְבַר הֲלָכָה שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר וּבְפִתְחוֹ עָמְדוּ כׇּל הָעָם וְאֵין עֲמִידָה אֶלָּא שְׁתִיק …
Torah Mindfulness Sotah 38 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-05 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Beis tells us that the Cohanim actually are beneficiaries of the very same blessings they pronounce. אָמַר רַבִּי יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן לֵוִי מִנַּיִן שֶׁהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מִתְאַוֶּה לְבִרְכַּת כֹּהֲנִים שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר וְשָׂמוּ אֶת שְׁמִי עַל בְּנֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל וַאֲנִי אֲבָרְכֵם …
The Sinai Campaign Sotah 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-05 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the level of details and explanation that was given along with the written Torah: רַבִּי יִשְׁמָעֵאל אוֹמֵר כְּלָלוֹת נֶאֶמְרוּ בְּסִינַי וּפְרָטוֹת בְּאֹהֶל מוֹעֵד רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא אוֹמֵר כְּלָלוֹת וּפְרָטוֹת נֶאֶמְרוּ בְּסִינַי וְנִשְׁנוּ בְּאֹהֶל מו …
Promises, Promises Sotah 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses what seems to be a prophecy about the return to Jerusalem in the time of Ezra, which was not fulfilled: וְאוֹמֵר תִּפֹּל עֲלֵיהֶם אֵימָתָה וָפַחַד עַד יַעֲבֹר עַמְּךָ ה׳ זוֹ בִּיאָה רִאשׁוֹנָה עַד יַעֲבֹר עַם זוּ קָנִיתָ זוֹ בִּיאָה שְׁנִיָּה And similarly, the verse says: “Terror and drea …
Self Fulfilling Prophecy Sotah 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the intentions of the Spies: וַיֵּלְכוּ וַיָּבֹאוּ אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן מִשּׁוּם רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן יוֹחַי מַקֵּישׁ הֲלִיכָה לְבִיאָה מָה בִּיאָה בְּעֵצָה רָעָה אַף הֲלִיכָה בְּעֵצָה רָעָה And they went and they came” (Numbers 13:25–26). Rabbi Yoḥanan sa …
God May Let You Do What You Want, Even If It Is Wrong Sotah 34 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses God’s ambiguous directive to Moshe about sending out the Spies: שְׁלַח לָךְ אֲנָשִׁים אָמַר רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ שְׁלַח לְךָ מִדַּעְתֶּךָ וְכִי אָדָם זֶה בּוֹרֵר חֵלֶק רַע לְעַצְמוֹ וְהַיְינוּ דִּכְתִיב וַיִּיטַב בְּעֵינַי הַדָּבָר אָמַר רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ ב …
What Do Angels Know? Sotah 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-05-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud Aleph tells us that while prayers can technically be said in any language, there are metaphysical barriers when the prayer is not in the holy tongue, l’shon kodesh: תְּפִלָּה רַחֲמֵי הִיא כׇּל הֵיכִי דְּבָעֵי מְצַלֵּי It is stated in the mishna that the Amida prayer may be recited in any language. The reason for this is that since prayer is a request for divine mercy, one may …
Location Is Everything Sotah 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-30 00:00:00
Our gemara on Amud Beis notes that the sin offering (chattas) is sacrificed in the same location: וּגְנוּתוֹ בְּקוֹל רָם וְהָאָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן מִשּׁוּם רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן יוֹחַי מִפְּנֵי מָה תִּקְּנוּ תְּפִלָּה בְּלַחַשׁ כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא לְבַיֵּישׁ אֶת עוֹבְרֵי עֲבֵירָה שֶׁהֲר …
Good Job, Bad Job Sotah 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on aleph concludes that Iyov’s level of love and fear of God matched Avraham’s. תַּנְיָא רַבִּי מֵאִיר אוֹמֵר נֶאֱמַר יְרֵא אֱלֹהִים בְּאִיּוֹב וְנֶאֱמַר יְרֵא אֱלֹהִים בְּאַבְרָהָם מָה יְרֵא אֱלֹהִים הָאָמוּר בְּאַבְרָהָם מֵאַהֲבָה אַף יְרֵא אֱלֹהִים הָאָמוּר …
Sing Baby, Sing Sotah 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-22 00:00:00
Sing Baby, Sing Sotah 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the levels of prophecy that occurred at the splitting of the Red Sea and how the Jews and Moshe responded via the prophetic singing of Az Yashir: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן דָּרַשׁ רַבִּי יוֹסֵי הַגְּלִילִי בְּשָׁעָה שֶׁעָלוּ יִשְׂרָאֵל מִן הַיָּם נָתְנוּ עֵינֵיהֶם לוֹמַר שִׁירָה וְכֵיצַד אָמ …
More on the Psychology of Rabbinic and Torah Laws Sotah 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis, quoting our Mishna on Daf 27b, explains that Rabbi Yochanan predicted that a later generation of Sanhedrin will overturn Rabbi Akiva’s Kal V’chomer. Maharitz Chayes on Daf 27 notes that this Gemara is a strong proof to the Rambam’s position (Laws of Mamerin (2:1) that a different Sanhedrin from a later generation can overturn rulings of a prior Sanhedrin based on derashos and limmudim, even of they …
Technically Not a Sin, Oh But it Is! Sotah 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph tells us that a husband who commits sins cannot expect the waters of Sotah to work. He only has the right to make such moral demands on her if his own behavior is free of sin. דְּאִי אִית בֵּיהּ עָוֹן בָּדְקִי לֵיהּ מַיָּא כִּי אִית בֵּיהּ עָוֹן בְּדִידֵיהּ מִי בָּדְקִי לַהּ מַיָּא לְדִידַהּ וְהָא תַּנ …
Sharing the Burdens of Life Together Sotah 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-25 00:00:00
תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן אֲשֶׁר תִּשְׂטֶה אִשָּׁה תַּחַת אִישָׁהּ לְהַקִּישׁ אִישׁ לְאִשָּׁה וְאִשָּׁה לְאִישׁ לְמַאי הִלְכְתָא אָמַר רַב שֵׁשֶׁת כְּשֵׁם שֶׁאִם הוּא סוֹמֵא לֹא הָיָה מַשְׁקָהּ דִּכְתִיב וְנֶעְלַם מֵעֵינֵי אִישָׁהּ כָּךְ הִיא אִם …
Rewarding Bad Behavior Sotah 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a dispute between Rabbi Akiva and Rabbi Yishmael regarding what benefits accrue for the woman who goes through the Sotah ordeal and is proven innocent. The verse states, “And she shall be cleared, and shall conceive seed” (Numbers 5:28) but how far does this go?: דְתַנְיָא וְנִקְּתָה וְנִזְרְעָה [זָרַע] שֶׁאִם הָיְתָה עֲקָרָה נִפְקֶד …
God Can Tolerate Many Sins So Long As We All Get Along Sotah 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses three situations where prosecution of Beis Din can be suspended if the accusing parties choose to forgive their original charges: אָמַר רַבִּי יֹאשִׁיָּה שְׁלֹשָׁה דְּבָרִים סָח לִי זְעֵירָא מֵאַנְשֵׁי יְרוּשָׁלַיִם בַּעַל שֶׁמָּחַל עַל קִינּוּיוֹ קִינּוּיוֹ מָחוּל וְזָקֵן מַמְרֵא …
We Knead to Be Productive Sotah 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis uses specific terms to describe two different levels of mental incapacity that would allow Beis Din to act on behalf of the husband, should his wife be suspected of adultery. In the first case they describe a Shoteh, which is a degree of mental incapacity (see Chagigah 3b which defines a Shoteh, as well as an interesting Psychology of the Daf, Chagigah 3, click here: https://nefesh.org/SimchaFeuerman/chaggigah--talmudic-we …
The Real Pain of Social Ostracism Sotah 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud beis discusses a difference in how capital punishment is meted out to a man versus a woman. A man is completely naked while the woman is clothed. Although our Gemara offers a proof text for this, in reality it is based on a logical analysis, as per Gemara Sanhedrin (45a and Tosafos 45a.) The reasoning is as follows, though being stoned while naked will hasten death, because the impact will be more lethal, the woman still wears …
Who is a Torah Ignoramus? Sotah 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph lists various criteria that describe an ignoramus (in Torah), as called by the Gemara, an Am-Ha’aretz: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: אֵיזֶהוּ עַם הָאָרֶץ? כֹּל שֶׁאֵינוֹ קוֹרֵא קְרִיאַת שְׁמַע שַׁחֲרִית וְעַרְבִית בְּבִרְכוֹתֶיהָ, דִּבְרֵי רַבִּי מֵאִיר. וַחֲכָמִים אוֹמְרִים: כֹּל שֶׁא …
Torah Study Versus Action Sotah 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the protective quality of Torah study and mitzvos: ״כִּי נֵר מִצְוָה וְתוֹרָה אוֹר״, תָּלָה הַכָּתוּב אֶת הַמִּצְוָה בְּנֵר, וְאֶת הַתּוֹרָה בְּאוֹר. אֶת הַמִּצְוָה בְּנֵר, לוֹמַר לָךְ: מָה נֵר אֵינָהּ מְגִינָּה אֶלָּא לְפִי שָׁעָה — אַף מִ …
First Impressions Last Sotah 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph refers to a Rasha Arum, a cunning wicked person. The Zohar (Vayeshev) describes the Evil Inclination as the prototypical Rasha Arum, because he arrives first in a person’s life. That is when a young child only knows raw instinct, he tends toward physicality and lust. Only later, as a child develops intellectual discernment, he is capable of having a good inclination. Since the evil incarnation has already long been …
A Guilty Look Sotah 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud beis discusses circumstances of the Sotah’s retraction of her willingness to drink from the waters. Sometimes it is considered a de-facto confession and therefore she no longer drinks, or instead we believe she is panic stricken, and her refusal is not a confession, rather she may still be innocent and thus drinks: לָא קַשְׁיָא הָא דְּקָהָדְרָא בַּהּ מֵחֲמַת רְתִיתָא ו …
God’s Foreknowledge and Free Will Sotah 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 04:02:43
Our Mishna on Amud Beis tells us that according to Rabbi Meir, one of the oaths that the Sotah takes is about her future behavior: רַבִּי מֵאִיר אוֹמֵר: אָמֵן שֶׁלֹּא נִטְמֵאתִי, אָמֵן שֶׁלֹּא אֶטָּמֵא. Rabbi Meir says that “amen, amen” means: Amen that I did not become defiled in the past, amen that I will not become defiled in the future. The Gemara elaborates:
…
The Blues Don’t Always Have to Bring You Down Sotah 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:54:17
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a mystical meditation that is inspired by the blue-like techeiles thread in the tzitzis: מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהַתְּכֵלֶת דּוֹמֶה לַיָּם, וְיָם דּוֹמֶה לָרָקִיעַ, וְרָקִיעַ דּוֹמֶה לְכִסֵּא הַכָּבוֹד — שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״וַיִּרְאוּ אֵת אֱלֹהֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל וְתַחַת רַגְלָיו כְּ …
Is a Rabbinic Derasha the Same as Torah Law? Sotah 16 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:49:03
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph describes a certain rabbinic derasha about Metzora as “Miderabanan”. This is an odd text because usually the term Midreabanan refers to laws that are rabbinic additions, not laws derived from derashos. The obvious difference being that something derived from a derasha has the force of a Torah law, and not subject to certain leniencies, such as physical duress, or following the lenient opinion when in doubt.&nb …
Our Inner Exile Sotah 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:45:21
Our Gemara on Amud Beis notes that the Sotah’s sacrifice is made of barley, which is considered animal food. The Gemara exhorts: She conducted herself in a beastly manner, therefore her sacrifice is that of a beastly food. It is important for us to reflect when reading such statements that they are not only for the Sotah, but are for all of us. Let us recall what we have learned on the first page of this Masechta: “Whoever sees the So …
Do Not Follow Every Middah of Hashem Sotah 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:43:09
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph enumerates the ways in which Hashem shows kindness, and how we should emulate this in our conduct: הַלֵּךְ אַחַר מִדּוֹתָיו שֶׁל הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מָה הוּא מַלְבִּישׁ עֲרוּמִּים דִּכְתִיב וַיַּעַשׂ ה׳ אֱלֹהִים לְאָדָם וּלְאִשְׁתּוֹ כׇּתְנוֹת עוֹר וַיַּלְבִּשֵׁם אַף …
A Mitzvah: Make No Bones About It Sotah 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:40:13
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about Moshe’s retrieving the bones of Yosef while the Jews were caught up in grabbing the spoils from the drowned Egyptians: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: בֹּא וּרְאֵה כַּמָּה חֲבִיבוֹת מִצְוֹת עַל מֹשֶׁה רַבֵּינוּ, שֶׁכׇּל יִשְׂרָאֵל כּוּלָּן נִתְעַסְּקוּ בַּבִּיזָּה, וְהוּא נִתְעַסֵּק בּ …
Sometimes It Is Best Not To Fight the Yetzer Hara Sotah 12 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 03:38:14
Our Gemara on Amud Alpeh describes how beautiful Miriam had become, as indicated by various secondary names given to her by scripture. One name was Esnan, which means gift. However, it also is reminiscent of the scriptural use of this word in the context of payment given to a prostitute for sexual services (See Devarim 23:19). In Miriam’s case, the sexual charge is not seen as negative, and to the contrary, she is seen as somehow an inspira …
Is Good Stronger than Evil? Sotah 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that not only does God punish measure for measure, but God also rewards measure for measure. Additionally, the reward is much more than just an equal measure, because the Middah of goodness is greater than the Middah of punishment. אֲמַר לֵיהּ רָבָא הָא וְכֵן לְעִנְיַן הַטּוֹבָה קָתָנֵי אֶלָּא אָמַר רָבָא הָכִי קָתָנֵי וְכֵן ל …
How Bad is it to Embarrass Someone? Sotah 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis warns of the severity of causing another person public humiliation, to the extent that he or she would turn white: מַר רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן חֲסִידָא, וְאָמְרִי לָהּ אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן מִשּׁוּם רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן יוֹחַי: נוֹחַ לוֹ לָאָדָם שֶׁיַּפִּיל עַצְמוֹ לְתוֹךְ כִּבְשַׁן ה …
Is It Love, Or Is It Hate? Sotah 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the evil plans that the Serpent had for Adam and Chava, namely to eliminate Adam as his rival. His plan was to incite Chava to eat from the forbidden Tree of Knowledge, which would lead her to giving Adam to eat as well. Adam would die as result, so he can have Chava all to himself. The Maharsha raises the obvious question: If Chava ate from the forbidden tree, would this not also result in her death? …
Narcissism, Guilt and Self-Punishment Sotah 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-05 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis notes how providentially we find that the punishment fits the crime, as well as the Gemara later discussing that the reward also is commensurate, and even more, as we’ll discuss tomorrow on Daf 11. It is understood that the punishment and reward take on the same property or method as the original deed in order to show God’s providence, and it is not merely a coincidence. Is it true psychologically as well, is t …
Dr. Fauci and Talmud Bavli Sotah 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses various traditions of what is stated to the Sotah, in order to encourage her to confess (assuming she is guilty) and avoid the Ordeal of the bitter Waters: וְאוֹמֵר לָהּ בִּתִּי הַרְבֵּה יַיִן עוֹשֶׂה הַרְבֵּה שְׂחוֹק עוֹשֶׂה הַרְבֵּה יַלְדוּת עוֹשָׂה הַרְבֵּה שְׁכֵנִים הָרָעִים עוֹשִׂין And additi …
Just the Flax, Ma’am Sotah 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis rules that a woman about whom there are strong rumors of infidelity, to the extent that she is the object of a particular kind of gossip, does not drink the Sotah waters: הִיא וְלֹא שֶׁיִּשְׂאוּ וְיִתְּנוּ בָּהּ מוֹזְרוֹת בַּלְּבָנָה The baraisa continues: The next word in the verse, “she [hee],” excludes a third case: But not where she, i.e., her in …
The Waking Dead Sotah 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-03 00:00:00
In the Lecha Dodi liturgy that we recite Friday night, which welcomes Shabbos and the redemption, there seems to be an incorrect ordering of these two stanzas: הִתְנַעֲרִי מֵעָפָר קוּמִי, לִבְשִׁי בִּגְדֵי תִפְאַרְתֵּךְ עַמִּי, עַל יַד בֶּן יִשַּׁי בֵּית הַלַּחְמִי, קָרְבָה אֶל נַפְשִׁי גְּאָלָהּ: Shake the dust off yo …
Who is Wrong? The Rebbe or the Student? Sotah 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-04-02 00:00:00
People from my parents’ generation used to draw a comparison to the old style of chinuch versus the new post Dr. Spock generation. In the old days, if a child came home from school and was crying that the teacher hit him, the parent would hit him again and say, I“If your teacher hit you, it must be for a good reason!“ While in our times, if a child came home, complaining that the teacher hit him, the parents would rush to the sc …
What’s Worse? Being Constantly Cruel or Ending a Marriage? Sotah 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses an opinion that even though the Sotah ritual is activated by the husband according to a formula prescribed by the Torah, this act of jealously warning her to not to be alone with a certain suspected person is forbidden, because it causes strife (see Rashi). Shitta Mekubetzes raises an obvious logical objection. If it turns out that he legitimately suspects his wife of immoral behavior, and he is not just b …
Pay Attention Before It’s Too Late Sotah 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us: רַבִּי אוֹמֵר לָמָּה נִסְמְכָה פָּרָשַׁת נָזִיר לְפָרָשַׁת סוֹטָה לוֹמַר לָךְ שֶׁכׇּל הָרוֹאֶה סוֹטָה בְּקִלְקוּלָהּ יַזִּיר עַצְמוֹ מִן הַיַּיִן Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi says: Why is the portion of a nazirite (Numbers, chapter 6) placed adjacent to the portion of a sota (Numbers, chap …
Dimensions of the Amen Response Nazir 66 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the importance of saying Amen after a blessing: רַבִּי יוֹסֵי אוֹמֵר: גָּדוֹל הָעוֹנֶה ״אָמֵן״ יוֹתֵר מִן הַמְבָרֵךְ. וְאָמַר לוֹ רַבִּי נְהוֹרַאי: הַשָּׁמַיִם! כָּךְ הוּא: תֵּדַע שֶׁהֲרֵי גּוּלְיָירִים מִתְגָּרִין בַּמִּלְחָמָה, וְגִבּוֹרִים נוֹ …
Occupied Territories Nazir 65 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse about Yaakov’s burial wishes as a proof text that requires a portion of the nearby earth to be taken along with a disinterred corpse, when it is being transferred to another grave (Bereishis 47:30): וְשָֽׁכַבְתִּי֙ עִם־אֲבֹתַ֔י וּנְשָׂאתַ֙נִי֙ מִמִּצְרַ֔יִם וּקְבַרְתַּ֖נִי בִּקְבֻרָתָ֑ם וַיֹּאמַ֕ר אָנ …
Does God Trust Your Repentance? Nazir 64 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the idea that a person is considered eligible to be counted as part of the Paschal sacrifice once he completes the rituals of purification, even though he will not become fully purified until after the Sun sets. The Gemara employs a formulation known as, “Shimsha Memeyla Arev - The Sun sets by itself”, i.e. the person has completed all the activities he must do, and since the Sun will set of its …
Setbacks Are Serious But Routine Nazir 63 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the verse which describes what the Nazir must perform in order to recover and restart his Nazirhood, subsequent to becoming exposed to a corpse (Bamidbar 6:9): וְכִֽי־יָמ֨וּת מֵ֤ת עָלָיו֙ בְּפֶ֣תַע פִּתְאֹ֔ם וְטִמֵּ֖א רֹ֣אשׁ נִזְר֑וֹ וְגִלַּ֤ח רֹאשׁוֹ֙ בְּי֣וֹם טׇהֳרָת֔וֹ בַּיּ֥וֹם הַשְּׁבִי …
So Far, You Didn’t Sin Nazir 62 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph makes a statement about annulment of vows that is said many times throughout Shas: הֶיתֵּר נְדָרִים פּוֹרְחִין בָּאֲוִיר “The halakhos of dissolution of vows, namely that one may request from a halakhic authority to annul them, fly in the air and have nothing to lean upon, i.e., these halakhos are not mentioned explicitly in the Torah. Sefer Arvei Nachal (Noach 2, 5663) unders …
We Hold These Truths to be Self-Evident Nazir 61 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph implies that Gentiles are not specifically obligated in the commandment to honor thy father and mother. Likewise, Kiddushin (31a) indicates that even the notable Dama ben Nesina, whose stories of honoring his father were legendary examples and object lessons for the sages, was still technically not obligated in honoring his father. A number of commentaries (see Yad Avraham and Rabbi Akiva Eiger on Shulkhan Arukh YD …
Manna, Now Available at Costco in Jumbo Size Nazir 60 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records a discussion between Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai and his students: שָׁאֲלוּ תַּלְמִידָיו אֶת רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן יוֹחַי נָזִיר טָהוֹר וּמְצוֹרָע מַהוּ שֶׁיְּגַלֵּחַ תִּגְלַחַת אַחַת וְעוֹלָה לוֹ לְכָאן וּלְכָאן אָמַר לָהֶן אֵינוֹ מְגַלֵּחַ The students of Rabbi …
Everyone Needs Encouragement Nazir 59 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis refers to a teaching approach repeated several times in Shas, known as,“To sharpen the students”. A teacher may say over something that is obviously incorrect in order to stimulate the students to question the teaching. The idea is to keep the students on their toes and create an environment where all ideas are critically challenged and not taken for granted. In other words, the teacher “serves softballs& …
Spiritual Dashboard Nazir 58 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph refers to the classic Talmudic principle of עשה דוחה לא תעשה, that is, a positive command in the Torah is taken to override a negative prohibition. The Shalah (Aseres Hadibros, Yoma, Derech Chaim 62) wonders why the Torah describes various punishments for transgressing prohibitions (death, Kares, lashes) but is silent regarding the punishment for refusing to obey a positive mitzvah. This counter intuiti …
How Important is Positive Self-Talk? Nazir 57 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records a statement made in frustration by Rav Adda bar Ahava that ended up as a curse against the children of Rav Huna. The words of a sage are so powerful, that even when not fully intended, they have an effect. This idea that words affect reality is a highly regarded principle mentioned dozens of times in the Gemara. Sanhedrin (102a) characterizes it as a covenant between one’s lips and God. Sefer HaChinuch …
Cite Your Sources as a Matter of Corpse Nazir 56 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the obligation to cite sources when quoting a teaching. But there is a chain of at least three scholars, such as, “rabbi so and so, in the name of rabbi so and so, in the name of rabbi so and so”, it is permissible to quote the first and last source, without stating the middle sources. Presumably, the point of quoting the first and last source is to provide basic verification by preserving the o …
Yosef’s Rebuke Nazir 55 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the situation of a mobile shelter, and if it has the same status as a stationary one, in that it protects one who is inside it from impurity on the outside such as traveling over a corpse. Tosafos (“Ve-Hatanya”) makes a distinction between a mobile shelter that is held up by people such as a litter, versus a waving cloak in the air that incidentally covers a person and a corpse. The waving cloa …
Nature Abhors a Vacuum Nazir 54 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the halakhic idea that impurity from a corpse and a grave ascend directly without any barriers.
Shem Mishmuel (Mishpatim 7 and Chukas 3) expands on the theme we saw in the previous daf, that when there is potential for impurity, so too there is greater potential for purity, and vice versa. This is why there is a teaching that blessing is not conferred on a counted item, and further, that when J …
A Poor Conductor Nazir 53 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-17 00:00:00
There is an morbid vaudeville joke about the hapless shlemazel train engineer who was fired from his job. Feeling depressed, he puts his foot to the third rail, hoping to electrocute himself. Somehow, since this poor guy cannot seem to do anything right, he survives and is not zapped by the high voltage. Why, you might ask? Because, of course, he was a poor conductor! Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the concept of “sword …
The Arrogant Self Versus the Pure Self Nazir 52 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the quantity of blood from a corpse that is sufficient to impart impurity as if a full corpse was present. This amount is known as a “revi’is”, which is a quarter log, approximately 3.8 ounces. The Gemara Chullin (72a) bases this amount on the amount of blood needed to maintain a form of life, thus it embodies the soul. (While this is scientifically difficult to understand, Tosafos S …
Be Physical in Order to be Spiritual Nazir 51 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph continues the discussion of various states of decomposed flesh, and when it still is within the threshold of a corpse, to the extent that it can render a Nazir impure. Such corpse dust must not contain foreign ingredients mixed within it: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן אֵיזֶהוּ מֵת שֶׁיֵּשׁ לוֹ רָקָב מֵת שֶׁנִּקְבַּר עָרוֹם בְּאָרוֹן שֶׁל שַׁיִש …
Reality, What a Metaphor! Nazir 50 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a quantity of dust and decay from a corpse that renders a Nazir impure, and requires him to restart his Nazir observance. This Shiur is known as Maleh Tarvaad, the amount that fills a ladle. This small remainder of a human being is discussed elsewhere with theological significance. Pirke De-Rabbi Eliezer (34) says the dead will be resurrected from these remains. Mateh Moshe (513, also see Eliyahu Rabbah OH 300:2) …
Balance is Fluid Nazir 49 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records a discussion where Rabbi Yehuda (the Tanna) became angry that they allowed the students of Rabbi Meir into the Shiur. His objection was based on the fact that they were “kanteranim”, which we can translate as excessively argumentative. There is a similar Gemara in Kiddushin (52b) regarding a different halakhic discussion, but likewise Rabbi Yehuda became vexed because they allowed the students of Rabbi …
If You Insult a Person, You Insult God (God forbid!) Nazir 48 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse (Vayikra 24:18) וּמַכֵּ֥ה נֶֽפֶשׁ־בְּהֵמָ֖ה יְשַׁלְּמֶ֑נָּה נֶ֖פֶשׁ תַּ֥חַת נָֽפֶשׁ׃ One who smites the soul of a beast shall make restitution for it: life for life. Rav Yosef Bekhor Shor (ibid 24:17) says a remarkable peshat based on juxtaposition of two prior verses: וְנֹקֵ֤ב שֵׁם המ֣וֹת יוּמָ֔ת … and one who al …
Honoring the Dead and the Great Nazir 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud beis continues to discuss that for a Meis Mitzvah (an abandoned corpse), even a Cohen Godol must bury him, and this need overrides the Cohanic prohibition to not be defiled from a corpse. It is evident from how Tosafos (“Hachi Garsinan De-Iylu”) analyzes the particular situation, that the Cohen Godol is permitted to engage in taking care of the corpse even when burial is not possible such as Yom Kippur. For example, …
Inexplicable, Mysterious And Wonderous Nazir 46 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse (Devarim 6:20): אַחַר יִשְׁתֶּה הַנָּזִיר יַיִן “And after that the nazirite may drink wine” The rabbis use it to derive a law that the Nazir is still bound to his obligations, until after his sacrifices are brought. However, because the text is anomalous, there are a number of commentaries that see a particular lesson and message for the Nazir. The proble …
Do Not Forget You Are a Jew Nazir 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses Moshe bringing Yosef’s bones out of Egypt. There is a Midrash that gives us Moshe’s behind-the-scenes reaction to this. (The Midrash is obscure but quoted by the Baale Tosafos in Hadar Zekeinim Shemos 13:19): Moshe complains to God, “Why is it that Yoseph merited, at least, to be buried in the land of Israel, and not I?” God answered, “Yoseph called himself a Jew, and you did not.&r …
Abandoned Mitzvos Nazir 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the concept of Meis Mitzvah, an abandoned body with no identifiable relatives. In such a case, even a Cohen Godol and a Nazir are permitted to tend to the burial. Sefer Chassidim (261) says that metaphorically speaking, there are mitzvos which are neglected and abandoned and also are considered to be a Meis Mitzvah. Chofetz Chaim (Shemiras Halashon I:3) adds: This is true by force of a kal v’chomer. If a l …
Spiritual CPR Nazir 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the idea that a Cohen may be prohibited from entering a room where there is a Goses (a person who is about to die). This is not merely a rabbinic prohibition in case the person might die and then the Cohen would be in the same room as a corpse. Rather this is a Biblical prohibition, and applies even if the person does not die. Rishonim ask, since Eliyahu the Prophet was a Cohen according to tradition (Bava Metzi …
Animals Who Walk on Two Feet Nazir 42 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on the top of Amud Aleph discusses the mitzvah of Tzitzis. Using an idea from Sefer Haikkarim, Yismach Moshe offers a psychological and symbolic explanation for this mitzvah. Sefer Haikkarim (III:15) provides a philosophical backstory to the rivalry of Kayin and Hevel. Both left with the task of making their way in the world, Kayin works the land, while Hevel chooses to herd animals. Naturally, each brings sacrifices from their c …
The Rambam on the Cutting Edge Nazir 41 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-05 00:00:00
Continuing our discussion about Jewish prohibitions of cutting hair, our Gemara on this daf discusses the prohibition of cutting the hair on the side of one’s head, that is peyos harosh. Rabbi Rosner’s Daf Yomi Shiur from the last cycle quoted an intriguing Tur (Tur YD 181): “That which the Ramban says that the reason for the prohibition of cutting the Peyos is an order to not be similar to the customs of the idolaters, is not e …
Higher Standards Nazir 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes several verses in the Torah that serve as the source for the prohibition against shaving one’s beard with a razor, or possibly in a razor like fashion, depending on how it is interpreted by various poskim. There are two sets of verses that discuss prohibition, one having to do specifically with the Cohanim, and the other applied to all Jews. Halakhically, there is no distinction and our Gemara uses the t …
Double Binds in Relationships Nazir 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph mentions in passing elderly men who dye their beards black to appear younger. This raises a question because there is a prohibition for men to dye their hair, as it is considered a feminine activity, and therefore a violation of a man appearing as a woman. (See Makkos 20b and Shulkhan Arukh OH 340:1). However, one might simply say this Gemara is talking about gentile elders, and from the context of the general discussion, …
What Does it Take to Achieve Forgiveness for Sin? Nazir 38 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the principle that one does not receive the punishment of lashes for violating a general prohibition “lav shebichlalos”. The prohibition must be a specific item and not a broad or general category. Presumably, any time a negative commandment which also has some factor that lessens the intensity of the prohibition, it somewhat reduces the degree of punishment or reaction. There are other examples as we …
Hitting Rock Bottom Nazir 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-03-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Vayikra (6:20) that uses a strange language, “Anything that touches the flesh of the sacrifice shall become consecrated.” It’s a difficult verse to understand. Is holiness somehow contagious? Our Gemara interprets it as referring to the principle that absorption of an essence affects the object to an extent that it takes on the prohibition of that which it absorbed. Noam Elimelech …
Repenting is the Yeast You Could Do Nazir 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the prohibition of using leavened dough on the altar for sacrifices. Rabbenu Bechaye’s ethical treatise, Kad Hakemach (Pesach 1) offers a comprehensive explanation of the Torah’s symbolic aversion to chametz: Chametz represents the evil inclination. Like the slow leavening of dough, the evil within a personality creeps up and can overtake without proper vigilance. Pesach represents a potential …
Give the Devil His Due Nazir 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-27 00:00:00
Tosafos on Amud Aleph (“Rava”) discusses the possibility that an ox or donkey which was used in the sinful acts of either plowing together (which is a forbidden mixture, Devarim 22:10) or threshing while muzzled (ibid, 25:4) would be invalided to use as a sacrifice. The Keren Orah asks in regard to the scenario of threshing with a muzzle, but the action of the threshing itself was not a sin. That is, the ox did not participate in this …
Laws Masquerading as Morality Nazir 34 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-26 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Aleph and the rest of the daf begins a discussion about the various prohibitions and foods that the Nazir is restricted from. The verses spell out four different kinds of wine related products (Bamidbar 6:3-4): מִיַּ֤יִן וְשֵׁכָר֙ יַזִּ֔יר חֹ֥מֶץ יַ֛יִן וְחֹ֥מֶץ שֵׁכָ֖ר לֹ֣א יִשְׁתֶּ֑ה וְכׇל־מִשְׁרַ֤ת עֲנָבִים֙ …
The Importance of Clarity Nazir 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-24 00:00:00
As Daf 33 is tiny in terms of content, we will discuss a teaching at the top of 34a, “אין נזירות אלא להפלאה”, which means that in certain situations, a Nazir cannot make a vow that is contingent on something which will remain unclear. Naziriteship is imposed upon someone only if the vow is stated with explicitness [hafla’a] and enunciated. The Torah says that a vow must be “clearly” pronounced …
Everything is a Process Nazir 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Yirmiyahu (7:4): אַל־תִּבְטְח֣וּ לָכֶ֔ם אֶל־דִּבְרֵ֥י הַשֶּׁ֖קֶר לֵאמֹ֑ר הֵיכַ֤ל ה׳, היכל ה׳, היכל ה׳ המה Don’t put your trust in illusions and say, “The Temple of the LORD, the Temple of the LORD, the Temple of the LORD are these [buildings].” The Triple repetition seems to be understood by our Gemara as alluding …
Fake it Till You Make it Nazir 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph continues the discussion of Hekdesh Taus, the idea that a consecration that is made in error can still be valid. There is a lovely Chassidish Vort on this idea from Sefer Ramasayim Tzofim (Siman 1). Though we do not pasken Hekdesh Taus remains consecrated, even Bais Hillel admits that it is true under certain circumstances. Such as, erroneously declaring the ninth or eleventh animal as tithed, or in the law of …
Bais Shammai and Top Down Thinking Nazir 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis (continuing to 31a) discusses a dispute between Bais Shammai and Bais Hillel regarding if an item is declared consecrated for the Bais Hamikdash in error. Bais Shammai holds it remains sanctified, while Bais Hillel holds that since its inception was in error, the sanctification never takes hold. We have discussed elsewhere in Psychology of the Daf (Eiruvin 13) how thematically Bais Shammai relates to an ideal state, Edenic …
Affluenza Nazir 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a possible reason that the rabbis granted a father rights to declare his minor son a Nazir. The rabbis subsumed this under the general obligation of chinuch, the rabbinic directive to accustom a child in the practice of mitzvos. The Maharitz Chayes raises the following question: “We are aware that the idea of the mitzvah of Chinuch is to gradually accustom a child to his obligations so that he not be sudde …
Shabbos Mindset Nazir 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a scenario where the Shalmei Atzeres, the Sacrifices brought on Shavuous were not slaughtered with intention of the correct sacrifice. On Yom Tov, it is permitted to sprinkle the blood so at least the sacrifice can be salvaged and eaten as an ordinary shelamim sacrifice. However, the blood cannot be sprinkled on Shabbos due to the rabbinic prohibition of “mesaken”, which is considered fixing or repair …
No Atheists in the Grave Nazir 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud beis discusses how a son cannot bring his father’s sin offerings in his place. The basic idea is Ein Kapparah Lamesim, people who are dead cannot have atonement via the offerings of their descendants. (See Horiyos 6a, Commentary of Tosafos Harosh ibid “veha”, Rashi Meilah 10b “Velad”.) While this has been stated in terms of the ritualary aspect of sacrifices, we all know from live …
The Sin Offering for a Non-Sin Part Two Nazir 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara continues its discussion about the pairs of chattas and olah brought by certain people. An even more specific subset of this group are those who bring a bird sin offering and a bird olah offering, it is a pair of birds, usually consecrated at the same time, known as a “keyn” or a “nest”. This group includes a woman who gave birth, but is impoverished and cannot afford a lamb for the olah sacrifice, so she …
The Sin Offering for a Non-Sin Part One Nazir 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses an interesting scenario whereby a woman had separated money for her offerings as a nazirite, and her husband annuled her Nazirhood. If she had not stated which coins were designated for which offering, all the money will be earmarked for communal gift offerings. The Nazir brings a chattas, olah and shelamim, so the Gemara wonders how it is possible to convert what was set aside as a chattas for communal offering …
Who Gets Married First? Nazir 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph (and the previous Amud) takes a positive spin on the incestuous actions of Lot’s daughters. From their perspective, seeing the destruction of Sodom, they thought the world had come to an end. They saw it as their duty to repopulate the earth even if it meant having relations with their father. As such, since it was in their mind a mitzvah, so it was. (See yesterday’s Psychology of the Daf, Nazir 23.) א …
Can a Sin be the Will of God? Nazir 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the phenomenon of a sin that was not committed, but only due to technical interference. In other words, the person really wanted to commit the sin, just somehow circumstances prevented him from doing so: תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן אִישָׁהּ הֲפֵרָם וַה׳ יִסְלַח לָהּ בְּאִשָּׁה שֶׁהֵפֵר לָהּ בַּעְלָהּ וְהִיא לֹא יָדְעָה הַכּ …
Sin is Temporary Nazir 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the nature of the husband's annulment of a wife’s vow. We know he is given authority to annul a vow that pertains to a wife’s physical comfort as well as matters that interfere in the marriage within a day’s time (see Shulkhan Arukh YD 234:21 and 55, and Bamidbar 30:13.) The question under discussion is how does the annulment operate? Is it a retroactive removal of the vow, or is it merel …
Too Much Respect? Nazir 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph mentions the phrase, כְּדֵי שְׁאֵילַת שָׁלוֹם תַּלְמִיד לָרַב the time necessary for a student to inquire after the welfare of his rabbi. The Rishonim (see Shitta Mekubetzes here, Tosafos here 20b “amar ley”, and Gemara Bava Kama 73b) delineate the phrase as, “Peace onto you, my master”. The nature of this greeting is debated in halakha because of its tone …
Conversion Disorder Nazir 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a disappointing and challenging incident in the life of Queen Helene, and how this related to a dispute between Beis Shammai and Beis Hillel. The Mishna on 19b states: מַעֲשֶׂה בְּהֵילֵנִי הַמַּלְכָּה שֶׁהָלַךְ בְּנָהּ לְמִלְחָמָה וְאָמְרָה אִם יָבוֹא בְּנִי מִן הַמִּלְחָמָה בְּשָׁלוֹם אֱהֵ …
Sometimes Too Hard, Sometimes Too Easy Nazir 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-10 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph repeats the often quoted exhortation of Rabbi Elazar HaKappar: דְּתַנְיָא רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר הַקַּפָּר בְּרַבִּי אוֹמֵר מָה תַּלְמוּד לוֹמַר וְכִפֶּר עָלָיו מֵאֲשֶׁר חָטָא עַל הַנָּפֶשׁ וְכִי בְּאֵיזוֹ נֶפֶשׁ חָטָא זֶה אֶלָּא שֶׁצִּיעֵר עַצְמוֹ מִן הַי …
Shedding Your Old Self Nazir 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-10 00:00:00
On this daf we compare the shaving of the Nazir to the shaving of the Metzora. In actuality, there are three shaving rituals in Biblical Judaism: Metzora, Nazir and the initiation of the Levites (Mishna Negaim 14:4.) (There is a fourth, if you count the custom of Upsherin.) Sefer Hachinuch (174) explains that the common thread in all three of these rituals is to signal a rebirth, as a newborn infant who is relatively hairless. The Levites inaugur …
Good Faith Efforts Nazir 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a distinction between a Nazir who vowed his Nazirhood while he was Tameh Mes (ritually impure due to exposure to a corpse), versus someone who began his status of Nazir while pure, and then became impure via exposure to a corpse. Both must undergo the 7 days of purification with the ashes of the Red Heifer in order to start or restart counting the days of being a Nazir to fulfill their vow. However, in the …
Easier to Learn the Entire Shas than to Change One Middah Nazir 16 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses that the standard amount of days for an unspecified Nezirus is 30. The Gemara (5a) sees a hint to this from the Gematria numeric of the Hebrew word “Yihyeh”, “He shall be a holy” in Number 6:5, which equals 30. Why does the Torah not make this number explicit? The Meshech Chokhma explains that the Torah leaves it vague because each person must make their own evaluation of what is ne …
Everything is Copacetic Nazir 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis references an idea that the first three days of mourning have a separate significance. Moed Kattan (21b and 27b) speaks of this as a time for “crying” and extra grief. More so, Shulkhan Arukh (YD:394:1) codifies this a halakhic requirement to refrain from excessive mourning and to limit the “period of crying” to the first three days. Pele Yoetz (“Bechiyya”) also speaks of the importance …
Transition Time for Tests Nazir 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses Adar 7, the auspicious day that Moshe was born and passed away. On that day we are also taught that the Manna ceased. Yet the Gemara Kiddushin (38a) tells us that though it stopped on that day, the Jewish people continued to be sustained by the leftovers until the 16th of Nissan. The Gemara similarly tells us that the dough-cakes the Jews took out of Egypt also tasted like the Manna. What is the significance of …
The Pursuit of Happiness Nazir 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph Discusses a scenario, whereby one person overhears another, declaring, “I hereby accept upon myself being a nazir if a child is born to me.” The person who overhears it says, “Myself as well”. The question is, what did he mean by, “myself as well”? Did he mean, “I, too, will take this vow upon myself in gratitude for your having a child”, or does he mean, “I, too, will …
Emotional Holding Nazir 12 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a scenario where a man tries to forestall and annul vows that his wife might make while he is away. In one iteration, the Gemara has a textual problem in the teaching that involves appointing an agent to make the annulment. The Gemara wonders, why appoint an agent? Why not merely declare in advance that all vows are annulled? The Gemara answers that he is afraid that he will become distracted on the day of his de …
Pounds of Prevention for an Ounce of Cure Nazir 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario where a person was drinking, or even drunk and declared,”I am a Nazirite from this wine.” The rabbis ruled that the person only intended to swear off this wine, but not to actually be a Nazir. Tosafos explains that sometimes when a person is drunk, others tease and goad the person to drink more. Therefore, in reaction, the person swore off the wine. His intention was not …
Holy Cow! Nazir 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tries to understand a strange declaration made by the protagonist in the Mishna. The fellow is frustrated with his cow that is refusing to budge, and declares, “This cow says, I am hereby a Nazir if I get up.” Obviously, the cow cannot make declarations. The Gemara explains, when the person said “this cow says”, he meant to say, “this cow THINKS she is not going to get up&he …
Bad Hair Day Nazir 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-02-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph states that according to the opinion of אין שאלה בהקדש, one cannot annul vows made for sanctification purposes, one also cannot annul a nazirite vow. Tosafos offers a proof text that Nazirhood is a sacrament (Bamidbar 6:5): קָדֹ֣שׁ יִהְיֶ֔ה גַּדֵּ֥ל פֶּ֖רַע שְׂעַ֥ר רֹאשֽׁוֹ׃ He shall be holy, the one who grows the hair of his head. The simple understanding is that …
Mission Accomplished Nazir 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about a man who accepted upon himself 365 consecutive Naziriyos, (30 days x 365). Upon his completion of this cycle he passed away. This story brings to awareness the idea that sometimes a person may be living off the merit of a particular mitzvah or purpose, and if he stops, it could be the end of the line. Similar to an old brick wall that was held up with dirt and moss in the cracks in the place of cement. If …
All In a Day’s Work Nazir 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-30 00:00:00
Our General on Amud Aleph references the halakhic definition of a day, which is the day behind the prior night. This is learned from verses in Bereishis, “It was evening, it was morning.” Therefore, most Jewish practices that begin or end on a certain day, start the evening before. As of course, Shabbos and Yom Tov begin on the evening before. A notable exception to this rule is for counting days of validity for eating the meat of a s …
Back to the Future Nazir 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the challenge of the Nazir who unfortunately becomes exposed to a corpse. The verse seems to indicate that he must start his counting all over again. So whatever time he pledged to become a Nazir must now be repeated after he undergoes a purification process. The verse states (Bamidbar 6:12): וְהַיָּמִ֤ים הָרִאשֹׁנִים֙ יִפְּל֔וּ כִּ֥י טָמֵ֖א נִזְ …
Don't Be So Humble - You Are Not That Great Nazir 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-27 00:00:00
(Quote from Golda Meir) There is a humorous story about an up and coming student who attended one the great mussar yeshivos in Europe. In this yeshiva, there was an attic where the more pious would meditate on their state of smallness in the world. Of course, one did not have the temerity to THINK that he is so big, as to attempt to become so small. By some kind of unwritten pecking order, only certain people dared to enter that upper …
Paradise Lost Nazir 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph seems to indicate that Kiddush with wine is part of the Deoraysa (Biblical) mitzvah of declaring Shabbos, and not merely a rabbinic requirement. Therefore, it may be that one would not be able to fulfill the Biblical obligation of Kiddush Friday night without wine (although this is subject to debate, compare the mefaresh “Harey Mushba”, 4b with Tosafos. Also see Rabbenu Tam, Sefer Hayashar 62.) If we are …
In the End, It’s Just a Matter of Time Nazir 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Daniel (22:17): וָאֶשְׁמַ֞ע אֶת־הָאִ֣ישׁ ׀ לְב֣וּשׁ הַבַּדִּ֗ים אֲשֶׁ֣ר מִמַּ֘עַל֮ לְמֵימֵ֣י הַיְאֹר֒ וַיָּ֨רֶם יְמִינ֤וֹ וּשְׂמֹאלוֹ֙ אֶל־הַשָּׁמַ֔יִם וַיִּשָּׁבַ֖ע בְּחֵ֣י הָעוֹלָ֑ם כִּי֩ לְמוֹעֵ֨ד מֽוֹעֲדִ֜ים וָחֵ֗צ …
When You Point a Finger, Three Other Fingers Point Back at You Nazir 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-25 00:00:00
We have discussed many times in Psychology of the Daf (see Nedarim 78), Chazal were ambivalent about pious declarations of abstention, such as the vows of the Nazirite, and as the Gemara on daf 4b explains in regard to Shimon Hatzaddik’s suspicion regarding the sincerity of Nazirite vows. Yet, with proper intention and maturity to handle this period of abnegation, it can be a catalyst for humility and change. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells …
Reviving a Dead Sex Life Nedarim 91 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis relates a true story and interesting quandary for an accused adulterer. This fellow heard the husband approaching the house and hid behind the door. From his vantage point, he noticed a snake had deposited its venom on some vegetables. When the husband was about to eat, he called out to him to save his life, but also blew his cover. The Gemara wonders, is his honesty a sign that he did not commit ad …
Golems, Pedagogy and Sex Robots Nedarim 90 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse in Yeshaiyahu 24:23 describing the cosmic changes of the Messianic era: וְחָֽפְרָה֙ הַלְּבָנָ֔ה וּבוֹשָׁ֖ה הַחַמָּ֑ה כִּֽי־מָלַ֞ךְ ה׳ צבקות בְּהַ֤ר צִיּוֹן֙ וּבִיר֣וּשָׁלַ֔͏ִם וְנֶ֥גֶד זְקֵנָ֖יו כָּבֽוֹד Then the moon shall be ashamed, And the sun shall be abashed. For the LORD of Ho …
Knocking on the Wrong Door Nedarim 89 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis relates a story of a person who was impetuously determined to study Torah. In fact, he made a vow that if he married before he “learns the halachos”, he would be forbidden to benefit from anything in the world. It is a matter of debate what he meant by “learning halachos”. Some of the commentaries are vague, though it does seem that it means mastery of the known body of practical t …
Speaking With a Unified Voice Nedarim 88 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-20 00:00:00
The Ran on Amud Beis discusses the status of possessions of a married woman. Since there is a nuptial agreement that the husband support his wife financially, in exchange for that, she agrees that her earnings become his property. What if someone gifts to the woman something with a stipulation that it not be transferable to her husband? Is this condition valid? The Ran proves that this condition is accepted as the halakhic norm …
Silent Scream Nedarim 87 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses more about Toch Kedei Dibur, that is a parcel of time that it takes to state, “Peace onto you, my master and teacher.” As we learned in Psychology of the Daf Nedarim 69, there are many halakhic distinctions that arise from this measure of time, mostly having to do with being allowed to renege or retract statements, conditions and agreements within this small time frame. Many commentaries …
God Respects the Autonomy of Our Thoughts Nedarim 86 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara and Mishna on Amud Beis discusses a case of how annulment cannot work in a situation of mistaken identity: מַתְנִי׳ נָדְרָה אִשְׁתּוֹ וְסָבוּר שֶׁנָּדְרָה בִּתּוֹ נָדְרָה בִּתּוֹ וְסָבוּר שֶׁנָּדְרָה אִשְׁתּוֹ …הֲרֵי זֶה יַחְזוֹר וְיָפֵר: MISHNA: If a man’s wife took a vow and he thought that it was his daught …
Does the Mouse Steal, or Does the Hole Steal? Nedarim 85 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph explains that when untithed produce is stolen and eaten, the thief technically should not have to pay for the portion which would be tithed since the only value available to the owner was the portion that remains non-sacred. However, Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi and Rabbi Yose son of Rabbi Yehuda disagree about the legal response. Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi holds that we fine the thief an additional payment of the sacred portion too, in …
Talent on Loan From God Nedarim 84 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-17 00:00:00
The late conservative talk show host, Rush Limbaugh, used to open his show with the tagline, “Talent on Loan from God”. Whatever your opinion about his politics or character, the idea that talent is on loan from God was a brilliant and humble statement. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the concept of “Tovas Hana’ah”, which is the benefit of control and assignment that exists for certain forms of Kodesh and Tze …
The Denial of Death Nedarim 83 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse from Koheles (7:2) as a proof text that the loss of ability to attend a funeral is considered a form of suffering: ט֞וֹב לָלֶ֣כֶת אֶל־בֵּֽית־אֵ֗בֶל מִלֶּ֙כֶת֙ אֶל־בֵּ֣ית מִשְׁתֶּ֔ה בַּאֲשֶׁ֕ר ה֖וּא ס֣וֹף כׇּל־הָאָדָ֑ם וְהַחַ֖י יִתֵּ֥ן אֶל־לִבּֽוֹ׃ It is better to go to a house of mourning t …
Gender Disparities in Experience of Sexual Deprivation Nedarim 82 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on the bottom of 81b to 82a discusses if a vow to abstain from sexuality constitutes a vow of עינוי נפש personal affliction, or categorized as a vow of matters between husband and wife. The halakhic nafka mina (practical outcome) has to do if the vow will remain in effect subsequent to termination of the marriage. The halakha is that vows of personal affliction, when annulled by the husband, are permanently removed. On the othe …
The Clothes Make the Man Nedarim 81 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph mentions various illnesses that befall a person who does not keep parts of his body or his clothes clean. Some of it seems to be psychological in origin, that is that it induces a sense of disorder, and possibly even mental illness. It is common sense to assume that one’s mode of dress influences their attitude, for better or for worse. What does the research say about this? We have the general psychological and cog …
Pledging During a Crisis Nedarim 80 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a concept that we have seen many times throughout Nedarim, namely, that vows are generally considered actions of the non-righteous. They are more often, impulsive, angry acts that do not represent the person's spiritual standing or ability to consistently follow the demands of the extra extension. This is why there is a phrase נדרי רשעים the oaths of the wicked, because generally speaking, they are not c …
Teach Them a Lesson Nedarim 79 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario where a husband affirms his wife's vow with spiteful intention, while in his heart still intending to annul it. The phrase the Gemara uses is “להקניט” which I think we could fairly translate as “to engage in quarrel, or to provoke”. The best word might be “incite”, which does bear homophonic similarity, but I have not been able to find an etymological link. Th …
Is it not Enough What the Torah Has Forbidden You? Nedarim 78 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-11 00:00:00
Continuing yesterday’s theme, ״this is the word” “זה הדבר״ means utter clarity and being synonymous with God’s will, we find a Peri Tzaddik (Mattos 1:1) that applies this understanding to the use of this phrase, which introduces the Torah’s section on nedarim. (Bamidbar 30:2 וַיְדַבֵּ֤ר מֹשֶׁה֙ אֶל־רָאשֵׁ֣י הַמַּטּ֔וֹת לִבְנֵ֥י יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל לֵאמֹ …
Ding an Sich Nedarim 77 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis references a particular phrase used in the Torah, “זה הדבר” “ this is the word“, or possibly, “this is the thing“. When the Torah uses a phrase like that, it implies a kind of specificity that is used for various derashos. Rashi (Bamidbar 30:2) quotes a Sifrei that discusses this terminology and how it applies to the prophecy of Moshe: זה הדבר. מֹשֶׁה נִתְנַבֵּ …
Innocent Until Improved Guilty Nedarim 76 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-09 00:00:00
Continuing our discussion of the Kal V’chomer discussed on the previous daf, the Rosh (“אינו דין”) discusses the following scenario: A person, while fully immersed in the Mikvah, touches a dead sheretz (a number of crawling animals that the Torah considers impure when dead), and then while still holding the sheretz, touches a vessel. There is a debate amongst poskim as to what point of the immersion process sheds th …
No Offense, But…Nedarim 75 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a dispute between Rabbi Eliezer and the sages regarding if a husband can preemptively nullify a vow in advance. Rabbi Eliezer argues (I am skipping some lomdishe details) via kal v’chomer that if a person can annul an existing vow, certainly he has the ability to annul a vow before it even starts. However, the sages refute this kal v’chomer with the following observation: Although on …
Understudy and Understood Nedarim 74 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-06 00:00:00
In our Gemara on amud beis, after hearing a particularly insightful piece of Torah from Rabbi Akiva, Ben Azai laments, “Woe to Ben Azzai, who did not serve under Rabbi Akiva.” Meaning, he had opportunity to learn more from Rabbi Akiva if he would have become his assistant or shamess. Torah consists of practical wisdom, and certain matters cannot be learned in a shiur but must be seen and experienced live. This idea is critical, …
The Company You Keep Nedarim 73 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-06 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario of wo women who are accused of infidelity and are required based on the evidence to go through the Sotah trial and ordeal in order to either prove innocence or encourage confession. These women do not undergo the ordeal together, as one person’s resolve might give the other inappropriate courage. Rashi (Sotah 8a) explains that if one of the women honestly did not commit adultery and therefore su …
Don’t Bring Baggage into the Marriage Nedarim 72 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-05 00:00:00
Our Mishna on amud beis tells us: מַתְנִי׳ דֶּרֶךְ תַּלְמִידֵי חֲכָמִים, עַד שֶׁלֹּא הָיְתָה בִּתּוֹ יוֹצְאָה מֵאֶצְלוֹ, אוֹמֵר לָהּ: כׇּל נְדָרִים שֶׁנָּדַרְתְּ בְּתוֹךְ בֵּיתִי — הֲרֵי הֵן מוּפָרִין. וְכֵן הַבַּעַל, עַד שֶׁלֹּא תִּכָּנֵס לִרְשׁוּתוֹ, אוֹ …
Married to Your Parents Nedarim 71 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis (as well as 68a) references the dispute between the House of Shammai and the House of Hillel, what actually happens when a husband nullifies his part of the vow, when there is a requirement that he do it jointly with the father (such as a na’arah who is an arusa). The lomdishe question is, does the husband cut the vow precisely in half (meygaz gayyaz), that is his share of the vow is broken, or does he weaken t …
Written Correspondence Nedarim 70 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes a verse in Bamidbar (30:7-8): וְאִם־הָי֤וֹ תִֽהְיֶה֙ לְאִ֔ישׁ וּנְדָרֶ֖יהָ עָלֶ֑יהָ א֚וֹ מִבְטָ֣א שְׂפָתֶ֔יהָ אֲשֶׁ֥ר אָסְרָ֖ה עַל־נַפְשָֽׁהּ׃ If she should become someone’s [wife] while her vow or the commitment commitment Lit. “utterance of her lips.” to which she bound herself is sti …
Can You Take Back What You Say? Nedarim 69 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-02 00:00:00
Don’t you wish you had a relationship rewind button? Wouldn't it be nice if after we said something stupid or hurtful, we can just delete it? No long tortured apologies, just, “Oops, I should not have said that, please strike it from the record!” Our Gemara on this Daf discusses various permutations of the father’s and/or husband’s ability to annul the young daughter’s, or wife’s, vow. O …
Wine and Romance Nedarim 68 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2023-01-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the husband’s right to annul a vow made by his wife, in regard to matters that will affect their personal relationship. Sometimes, we are able to get an indirect glimpse at various values, ethics and morals that Chazal endorsed by studying certain halachos. In this vein, I will discuss the idea of a wife drinking alcohol with her husband as a way to enhance romance and good experiences. There is no shortag …
The Power of Prayer and Torah Together Nedarim 67 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-30 00:00:00
On this daf we begin to learn about the relationship between husband and wife, father and daughter, in their ability to sometimes jointly, and sometimes individually, annul vows. A single Na’arah who makes a vow can have it annulled by her fathers say so on the day that he hears about it. If she is an arusa (married via kiddushin but not nisuin, that is not living together as husband and wife and still in her father’s house), the husb …
Stay Calm, and Don’t Jump to Conclusions Nedarim 66 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us about the Palestinian version of “Amelia Bedelia”: She was a simple but devout woman, and had difficulty comprehending the difference between her husband’s dialect and hers, leading to numerous frustrating encounters. Her husband would make a seemingly simple request, and she would misunderstand his words and give him something else to his great annoyance. Perhaps, she was what we would say today …
Traumatic Coping Styles Nedarim 65 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us the story of how king Tzidkiyahu witnessed Nebuchadnezzar eating a live rabbit. Though he was a cruel despot, apparently, he had his limits and was embarrassed. He therefore made Tzidkiyahu swear that he would not tell of this to anyone else. The secret was too difficult for Tzidkiyahu to bear, and he had his vow annulled by the sages. When Nebuchadnezzar found out, there was not a very happy ending for the sages …
Truth in Prayer Nedarim 64 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-28 09:28:28
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses Hashem telling Moshe that he now can return to Egypt, as “Those who have been seeking to kill you are now dead.” Moshe was a wanted man with his picture hanging in the Pitom and Ramses post office, for killing the Egyptian, so this was good news. Moshe had two sons in Midian, Gershom and Eliezer. Gershom named, Ger-Shom, meaning I was a stranger there. And Eliezer, Keyli-Ezri, my God saved me from the …
An Extra Helping of the Delights of Shabbos Nedarim 63 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses the ancient Jewish custom of eating garlic Friday night in order to enhance fertility, as it is a Mitzvah Friday night in particular to be intimate (See Ritva). By the way, there is corroborating scientific evidence that Garlic positively affects virility, and in particular cooked garlic. (See Bahrami KH, Mahjor AA, Johary H, Bahrami R, Bahrami A. Comparative study on histopatological and histomorphometric effect of raw and c …
History, or His Story? Nedarim 62 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us a harrowing story about Rabbi Tarfon, and how he was mistaken for a thief. In the end, he was released, but only because his captor found out he was the revered Rabbi Tarfon. This itself caused Rabbi Tarfon distress because he derived personal benefit from the crown of the Torah: רַבִּי טַרְפוֹן אַשְׁכְּחֵיהּ הָהוּא גַּבְרָא בִּזְמַן שֶׁהוּקְפְּלוּ ה …
Terms and Conditions May Apply Nedarim 61 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the dispute between Rabbi Yehuda and the Rabbis about if the Yovel Year is part of the next Shemitta Cycle (year one of seven). The rabbis hold that the Yovel year, in a certain sense, is outside of the counting. It is the 50th year but not part of the new cycle. The Maharal notes in Nesiv HaTorah (1) that there are three mitzvos that have a man made sanctification: (1) Terumos and Maasros (2) Hafrashas Ch …
The Chovos Halevavos and SSRI’s Nedarim 60 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-23 00:00:00
Shittah Mekubetzes on Amud Aleph remarks that the Mishna often discusses people who vow against drinking wine because drunkenness brings sorrow and regret. He is paraphrasing a Gemara (Yoma 76b) וְאַמַּאי קָרֵי לֵיהּ יַיִן, וְאַמַּאי קָרֵי לֵיהּ תִּירוֹשׁ? יַיִן — שֶׁמֵּבִיא יְלָלָה לְעוֹלָם. תִּירוֹשׁ — שֶׁכׇּל הַמִּתְגָּרֶה …
Altar Ego Nedarim 59 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the warning of Rav Nosson: Anyone who vows, it is as if he built a personal altar outside the Temple, and one who fulfills that vow, it is as though he burns an offering upon it The language is notable as there are two stages. First, the person impetuously makes an ill-advised vow. However, he’s not yet in such hot water. He can reverse course and humbly seek nullification from a sage. At this point he only b …
Kosher Pig? Nedarim 58 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on this Daf discusses the halachos of a דבר שיש לו מתירין an item that will eventually become permitted. When such material becomes diluted in a large mixture, many opinions hold that it cannot be nullified. There are different explanations for why this is so, but the simplest being that why rely on a leniency of nullification when anyways it will be permitted? There is a Midrashic tradition that in the Messianic future, …
Fiery Words Nedarim 57 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-21 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis mentions an unusual idiom for bringing up a question: העלה בידו he brought up with his hands. The Ran says that sometimes the words mouth and hand are interchangeable in Hebrew, and brings a proof from a verse in Yeshaiyahu (6:6) and the Targum. וַיָּ֣עׇף אֵלַ֗י אֶחָד֙ מִן־הַשְּׂרָפִ֔ים וּבְיָד֖וֹ רִצְפָּ֑ה בְּמֶ֨לְקַחַ֔יִם לָקַ֖ח מֵע …
Spiritual Home Inspection Nedarim 56 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the halachos of blemishes on a home. Now this is not your typical home inspection, looking for leaks or structural flaws. Instead the verses (Vayikra 14) discuss finding leprous spots on the walls of a home. These rules only applied to homes acquired after entry into the land of Israel and conquest. כִּ֤י תָבֹ֙אוּ֙ אֶל־אֶ֣רֶץ כְּנַ֔עַן אֲשֶׁ֥ר אֲנִ֛י נֹ …
The Upside of the Downside Nedarim 55 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about the importance of humility in acquiring and maintaining knowledge of Torah. The notable aspect of this description is a cycle of humility, bequest-ascension, entitlement-grandiosity, failure, and then recovery: כֵּיוָן שֶׁעוֹשֶׂה אָדָם אֶת עַצְמוֹ כַּמִּדְבָּר, שֶׁהוּא מוּפְקָר לַכֹּל — תּוֹרָה נִיתְּנָה לוֹ בְּמַ …
It Could be Heaven or it Could be Hell Nedarim 54 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes medical advice from the Great Amora, Rosh Yeshiva and Physician, Shmuel: אָמַר שְׁמוּאֵל: נוּן סָמֶךְ עַיִן — נוּנָא סַמָּא לְעֵינַיִם! as Shmuel said an acronym: Nun, samekh, ayin, which stands for: Nuna samma la’einayim, which means: Fish is a medicine for eyes. Maharsha says that the Jews, when they were complaining about the Man, also hinted at …
Athens or Jerusalem? Nedarim 53 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the rabbinic enactment that the very earth from outside Israel has an impurity to it. Shem MiShmuel (Ki Savo 9) discusses the mystical peshat in why this is so. Land itself has a certain drive and magnetic draw. Many cultures refer to their country land as “mother” or “father”. The Torah itself has references to the land itself, almost like it has a personality. For example (Vayikra …
Opposite and Helpful Nedarim 52 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-16 00:00:00
There is a landmark lomdishe Ran on Amud Aleph that discusses in-depth the Torah logic regarding bitul, which means the way in which certain unkosher or forbidden substances can be nullified in larger amounts. One of the principles he establishes is the idea behind the opinion which holds that like matters cannot be subject to bitul, nullification, in contradistinction to two different matters. (שיטת רבי יהודה שמין במינו אי …
Tune In To Your Family’s Needs Nedarim 51 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about shenanigans that Bar Kapparah, a badchan, did at Rabbi Yehuda Hanasi’s daughter’s wedding. At some point, part of a riddle challenge, he says: Tomorrow I will drink wine at your father’s dancing and your mother’s [kirekanei]. “Kirekanie” is probably an onomatopoeia. Some commentaries say it was singing (Ran), while others say dancing (Tosafos), and others say that it is m …
Taking Evil with a Grain of Salt Nedarim 50 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us a heartwarming story about Rabbi Akiva and Rachel’s love for each other, and sacrifice for Torah: בְּסִיתְוָא הֲוָה גָּנוּ בֵּי תִיבְנָא, הֲוָה קָא מְנַקֵּיט לַיהּ תִּיבְנָא מִן מַזְּיַיהּ. אֲמַר לַהּ: אִי הֲוַאי לִי, רָמֵינָא לִיךְ יְרוּשָׁלַיִם דְּדַהֲבָא. א …
Self Destructiveness and Compliance Nedarim 49 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us an interesting vignette about when Rabbi Yirmiyahu was unwell and a doctor came to visit him. when the doctor saw that he had a particular kind of food believed to intensify the illness, the doctor, exasperated, declared, ”The angel of death is in this house, and you were expecting me to try to cure him?” It is worth focusing on the common challenging human behavior pattern of self-destructive …
Pleasure and Good are Not the Same Nedarim 48 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-12 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario where a person makes an oath to not benefit from the person, is forbidden from benefiting from any of the community property. Included in this community property is the Shul and the scrolls (what we would call books, but they didn’t have books or codexes in those days.) The commentaries raise a question as to why it would be forbidden to benefit from the Shul or the Sefarim as there is a p …
The Leader is Only As Strong as the People Nedarim 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-11 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis uses an unusual form, instead of saying הֲרֵי אַתְּה עָלַי חֵרֶם behold you (“atah” masculine) are cherem, it says הֲרֵי אַתְּ behold you (”at” female), though the Mishna is referring to an interchange between two men, as it gives no indication of a gender specific halakha. Tosafos Yom Tov notes this and remarks that occasionally Hebrew will use the word fo …
Under New Management Nedarim 46Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a scenario where one makes an oath forbidding entry into a home. A distinction is made between whether the person uses the language of “this home“ or “your home.“ If he uses the term “your home“ emphasizing that the home is in possession of this person, if owner of the house dies or sells the house to another, it is permitted for the one who took the vow to enter the ho …
Caving Into Pressure to Sell Nedarim 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-09 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a scenario where two partners in a yard make an oath, forbidding each from deriving benefit from the other. Some of the factors that must be considered are: if this is a yard can be divided. That is, there are certain legal rules that dictate whether or not the area is big enough to be divided. In Choshen Mishpat, if a yard is too small to bevdivisible in an equitable manner, one partner may force the other to ei …
Rules to the Exceptions Nedarim 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph and Beis discusses tricks that connivers may engage in to avoid paying tithes, Peah (corner of field left for the poor) and the like, such as declaring their field ownerless: אִי הָכִי, אֲפִילּוּ מִיּוֹם הָרִאשׁוֹן נָמֵי לֶיהֱוֵי הֶפְקֵר! אָמַר רַבָּה: מִפְּנֵי הָרַמָּאִין, דְּמַפְקִירִין וְהָדְרִין בְּהוֹן. …
Truly Humble Nedarim 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-07 00:00:00
This daf discussed the legal status of Hefker, that is when a person declares his object or property ownerless and available for others to take. There are halakhic outcomes that are dependent on the exact nature of what is the process of hefker, such as is it in your domain until somebody else acquires it? Or, can you renege on your declaration and repossess it? In any case, while the Gemara analyzed the legal aspects of Hefker, let us look at th …
Borrowed Language Nedarim 42 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-06 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis describes The scope of activities that one would be forbidden to engage in with a person he made a vow to not have any benefit from. Two different words are used to describe the activity of lending. In Hebrew שאלה she’elah is used for borrowing objects, while halva’ah הלוא is used for borrowing money. This distinction exists in Hebrew but not in English. In English we use the word lend and borrow …
Serenity and Instinct Nedarim 41 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-05 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that fever is both an agent of the Angel of death, i.e., extremely harmful, but at the same time also has health benefits. Ben Yehoyada notes that this aligns with our scientific knowledge in that the fever is the body’s way of fighting infection. The heat from the fever breaks down proteins and also viruses. Obviously, if the fever is too high it’s going to cook the person's internal organs, but at t …
With Enemies Like These, Who Needs Friends? Nedarim 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph remarks about the benefit of good friends and the danger of friends of a lower caliber. Good friends will give you the right advice and guide you, such as Na’aman Who is able to take advice from his peers. However bad friends, such as Rechavam’s friends, give poor advice. Rechavam’s friends advised him to take a harsh stand as a new king, demanding even more taxes which led to a rebellion (see Melachim I …
Sin and Repentance Are Part of the Plan Nedarim 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph teaches: שִׁבְעָה דְּבָרִים נִבְרְאוּ קוֹדֶם שֶׁנִּבְרָא הָעוֹלָם, אֵלּוּ הֵן: תּוֹרָה, וּתְשׁוּבָה, גַּן עֵדֶן, וְגֵיהִנָּם, כִּסֵּא הַכָּבוֹד, וּבֵית הַמִּקְדָּשׁ, וּשְׁמוֹ שֶׁל מָשִׁיחַ. Seven phenomena were created before the world was created, and they are: Tora …
Reading Between the Lines Nedarim 38 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that Moshe became wealthy from the remaining material that was hewn from the Luchos. (Presumably the stone was exceedingly valuable and he sold them as gems.) Ben Yehoyada says that it is ridiculous to take this Aggadah at face value, as even if it mattered to Moshe to be wealthy, why in the world would he commercialize something as special as a stone or gem-like material from God, even if it were leftovers …
Shabbos Table Insanity Nedarim 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-12-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses why they did not teach cheder children new pieces of Torah on Shabbos. אֶלָּא: גַּבֵּי שַׁבָּת הַיְינוּ טַעְמָא דְּאֵין קוֹרְאִין בַּתְּחִילָּה — מִשּׁוּם דְּיִפְנוּ אֲבָהָתְהוֹן דְּיָנוֹקֵי לְמִצְוְתָא דְשַׁבְּתָא. וְאִיבָּעֵית אֵימָא: מִשּׁוּם דּ …
Count Your Sheep and Your Blessings Nedarim 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis raises an interesting question in regard to will and agency. We know that a person may act as an unappointed agent when doing a service that is a benefit, since we presume he would have agreed to appoint him. If so, what is the case in regard to taking Terumah (out of your own produce) to make another person’s “tevel” produce permitted as chulin? (In order to eat produce, Terumah must first be taken off f …
Agent of Light Nedarim 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the status of Cohanim in relation to their service in the Beis Hamikdash. Are they considered agents of God, or our agents whom we appoint to serve God in our stead? This has numerous applications, including if a Cohen, whom you vowed to not have benefit from, can stil bring your sacrifices. If he works for you as your agent, then he is bringing you a benefit. If he is merely following God‘s com …
Unburden the Beast Nedarim 34 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses a situation where one declares a loaf as Hekdesh (dedicated to the Beis Hamikdash). According to many commentaries, the scenario involves where he has not yet picked up the loaf but since it is within 4 cubits, he has a certain power over it. The idea that a person’s four cubits is their domain comes up in halakha in numerous incidences, and is a rabbinic enactment to allow for acquisition and reduce quarrels about owne …
Benefits Claws Nedarim 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph considers that certain actions are not concrete benefits, and even if one made a vow to not receive any pleasure from the other person, he still may receive this kind of benefit. For example, the Gemara considers paying a debt as metaphorically chasing away a lion, that is a non-act. Technically you didn’t give the person anything, you just saved his sheep from the lions. So too, paying a person’s debt m …
Psychological Legacies Nedarim 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses why Avraham was punished with the enslavement of his descendants in Egypt. Three opinions are offered:
אָמַר רַבִּי אֲבָהוּ אָמַר רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר: מִפְּנֵי מָה נֶעֱנַשׁ אַבְרָהָם אָבִינוּ וְנִשְׁתַּעְבְּדוּ בָּנָיו לְמִצְרַיִם מָאתַיִם וְעֶשֶׂר שָׁנִים — מִפּ …
Piety is More than Skin Deep Nedarim 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-25 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis discusses a scenario where a person makes a vow to not benefit from the uncircumcised. He is permitted to even benefit from Jews who were unable to circumcise themselves, and forbidden even to gentiles who did circumcise. Furthermore, the opposite holds true as well. If one makes an oath to refuse benefit from those who are circumcised, he is forbidden to all Jews, even those who are uncircumcised, and permitte …
Past Perfect Nedarim 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-24 00:00:00
What can a prophet predict, and how does that affect free-choice? Our Gemara on Amud Beis references a verse (I Melachim 13:2): הִנֵּה־בֵ֞ן נוֹלָ֤ד לְבֵית־דָּוִד֙ יֹאשִׁיָּ֣הֽוּ שְׁמ֔וֹ וְזָבַ֣ח עָלֶ֗יךָ אֶת־כֹּהֲנֵ֤י הַבָּמוֹת֙ הַמַּקְטִרִ֣ים עָלֶ֔יךָ וְעַצְמ֥וֹת אָדָ֖ם יִשְׂרְפ֥וּ עָלֶֽיךָ׃ A son …
No Such Thing as Half-Way Married Nedarim 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-23 00:00:00
There is a saying that there is no such thing as halfway pregnant. From the Halakhic perspective, there is no such thing as halfway married. Our Gemara on amud aleph tells us: אִילּוּ אָמַר לְאִשָּׁה ״הַיּוֹם אַתְּ אִשְׁתִּי וּלְמָחָר אִי אַתְּ אִשְׁתִּי״, מִי נָפְקָא בְּלָא גֵּט?! And what would happen if one said to a woman while performing bet …
Lying King Nedarim 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-22 00:00:00
Continuing our discussion regarding oaths under duress, our gemara on amud aleph questions why dodging tax collectors is a valid situation of duress. There is a teaching that דִּינָא דְמַלְכוּתָא דִּינָא The law of the kingdom is the law, i.e., there is a halakhic principle that Jews must obey the laws of the state in which they live. This halakhic rationale and degree to which the law of the secular government is bindin …
Rebel Without a Clause Nedarim 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-21 00:00:00
Is an oath made under duress and coercion valid? Our Mishna on Amud Beis discusses circumstances whereby if one makes an oath under duress, such as when threatened by bandits or a rogue tax collector, the oath is not binding. Thus if he says, “The produce of the world should be forbidden to me if…[whatever he is saying is false]”, it is not binding. (The case of the rogue tax collector is referring to a so-called governme …
Can God Regret? Nedarim 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on this daf discusses the halakhic concept of הנדר שהותר מקצתו. הותר כולו if a portion of a vow is deemed null, then the entire vow may be rendered invalid. As we discussed in Psychology of the Daf Nedarim 22, there are two legal mechanisms to annul a vow. Beis Din must either come up with a reason that you “regretted” having made it, known as “charata”, or that there was a certain ci …
Pay Attention Now, or Pay Later Nedarim 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about the famous case of “Kanya De Rava” “Rava’s Cane”, where a trickster tried to perpetrate a scam on Beis Din: דְּהָהוּא גַּבְרָא דַּהֲוָה מַסֵּיק בְּחַבְרֵיהּ זוּזֵי, אֲתָא לְקַמֵּיהּ דְּרָבָא. אֲמַר לֵיהּ לְלֹוֶה: זִיל פְּרַע לִי. אֲמַר לֵיהּ: פְּרַעְתִּיך …
Vulnerable to Vulnerability Nedarim 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-18 00:00:00
The commentary of the Rosh on Amud Aleph explains why a person may be reluctant to accept his host’s invitation without being able to reciprocate, based on the aphorism expressed in Mishley (15:27): וְשׂוֹנֵ֖א מַתָּנֹ֣ת יִחְיֶֽה He who spurns gifts will live long We can well understand why this might be a good character trait, but why does it specifically confer long life? Maharal in Nesivos Olam, Nesiv Haosher (1 …
On This Day, All Jews Can Be Equal Before Hashem Nedarim 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses what most commentaries believe serves as the basis for the custom of the Kol Nidre service on Yom Kippur. There are numerous kabbalistic theories as to what it signifies. On the most basic level, a person wants to come into the Day of Judgement clean and clear of any unfulfilled commitments. On a deeper level, annulling vows publicly may inspire a theurgic heavenly response of releasing and forgiving …
This Conversation Is Being Recorded For Quality Assurance Purposes Nedarim 22 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-16 00:00:00
In order to halakhically annul a vow, Beis Din must either come up with a reason that you “regretted” having made it, known as “charata”, or that there was a certain circumstance that you were unaware of which, had you known, you would not have vowed, known as “pesach”. There are nuances to this which we will discuss in upcoming essays (See Shulkhan Arukh YD 228.) Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us t …
Much Ado About A Little Nedarim 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-15 00:00:00
Our gemara on amud beis references the virtue of the righteous who say little but do much. This is most famously memorialized in Parashas Chaye Sarah where Avraham offers his guests a little water and bread, but actually provides them with a feast of delicacies (see Avos Derabbi Nosson 13:3). My father, Z”L used to say to me, “Simcha, do not commit too much, as the Yetzer Hara will overhear and try to stop you.” I do …
Knowing Torah by Itself Does Not Do the Trick Nedarim 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the virtue of shame. This is not pathological self-destructive shame, but rather a sense of place and humility. That is, to recognize how tiny and insignificant we are in comparison to God. Our lives are short and our accomplishments border on pointless, if not for the opportunity to access the infinite and the immortal, by elevating our actions via sacrifice and meaning. To quote the lyricist …
Pathological Attachment to Money Nedarim 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on 18b and 19a discusses the idea that when a person makes a vow about something that is impossible to clarify, does he have in mind to take it upon himself regardless? Or, did he only mean to include the items that surely fell under his statement? To use a simple example, if somebody says, “I make a vow to no longer to eat fruit”, but there is a particular food product that we are unsure of whether to classify it as …
Vain Leadership Nedarim 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the idea that swearing falsely is more severe than merely violating a neder. Swearing falsely has an additional injunction by which God declared that, “I will not cleanse those who bear my name in vain” (Shemos 20:6). What is this special quality about swearing falsely, compared to other sins, that that draws this particular reaction? In regard to this, God says he will not cleanse. Further developin …
Prior Commitments Nedarim 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the halakhic concept of Mushba Veomed Mehar Sinai, which literally translates as we are bound by a vow at Mount Sinai to uphold the Torah. The halakhic significance of this is to explain why a person who swears to violate a Torah principle is not obligated by this vow. He is already bound by the prior commitment of the vow at Mount Sinai. The simple understanding is that it is a literal vow. We are taught there w …
Don’t Blow Off Mitzvos Nedarim 16 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis references the concept of Mitzvos Lav Leyhanos Nitnu. That is, the observance of a Mitzvah is not based on experiencing any pleasure. Thus, in theory if one made a vow to not receive any benefit from an object, in certain circumstances, he may still utilize it in the performance of a mitzvah. If a person vowed not to receive benefit from a shofar, he can still use it to blow on Rosh Hashanah, as the mitzvah is …
Are You Running Away, or Toward? Nedarim 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-09 00:00:00
This last Sunday was the NYC marathon. Why does anyone do this? It is hard, hard work. Yet, it feels good. Would it feel as good if you ran 25 miles, being forced to do so at gunpoint on a death march? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph refers to an idea that certain customs can become defacto obligations, as if you had explicitly made a vow. Halachically this comes up in many areas discussed by poskim, such as when a person v …
It’s All About the Mother Nedarim 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-08 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the case of a man who made a vow at his wife, apparently in anger, stating “You shall be as my mother!” He is literally, swearing off having relations with his wife as if she is forbidden to him like mother. The Gemara discusses that technically she is not forbidden, as in order to make an oath, one must refer to a voluntary declaration of sanctity or abstention, such as an item dedicated as a …
Two Holy People Who Happen to Share the Same Home Nedarim 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-07 00:00:00
There are matters of this world that are holy by God, and others that we can voluntarily consecrate. There is an interesting category of matters which God decrees should be holy, but also expects Man to join in this declaration. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the mitzvah of Bechor, the first born animal that must be set aside for the Cohen and as an offering. The Gemara notes the relative uniqueness of the first born sacrifice that though it …
Boundary Violations Nedarim 12 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-06 00:00:00
Poor boundaries can lead to bad decisions, even when you mean well. Our Gemara references the fast day Tzom Gedaliah, which has to do with events described in Yirmiyahu 41. Gedaliah ben Achikam, the persian government’s appointed leader of the remaining Jewish settlement in Israel, was assassinated by Yishmael ben Netanya in a cruel double cross and massacre of innocent people. The Gemara Niddah (61a) notes that the verse implies guil …
Lo Siento Nedarim 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-04 00:00:00
An area where there is significant correspondence between Torah thought and psychological thought is that of the power of speech. Though coming from different value bases, Torah thought and psychological theory have respect for the organizing ability and impact of speech on attitude, and emotional and spiritual status. The more you learn Nedarim, the more you see that the Torah wants to condition us to treat words as substantive. …
Atoning In Advance? Nedarim 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-04 00:00:00
Is there a Torah idea that one can atone for future sins? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the reason why the Nazir must bring a sin offering. Though there have been numerous Midrashic and exegetical interpretations, the most provocative one is offered by Ramban on Chumash (Bamidbar 6:11). He says: In accordance with the plain meaning of Scripture, [it is because] this man sins against his soul on the day of completion of his Naziritehood …
Teach, Pray, Love Nedarim 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us the famous story of Shimon Hatzaddik’s encounter with a pious and sincere Nazir. Shimon Hatzaddik kisses the young man on his head, apparently in the courtyard of the Beis HaMikdash. The problem with this is that it seems to contradict a ruling of the Rama (OC 98:1): It is forbidden for a person to kiss one's small* children in synagogue, in order to fix in one's heart that there is no love like the lo …
The Problem is the Cure (and it’s Us!) Nedarim 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses apocalyptic traditions of how the righteous and the wicked will get their due at the end of days: אֵין גֵּיהִנָּם לָעוֹלָם הַבָּא, אֶלָּא הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מוֹצִיא חַמָּה מִנַּרְתִּיקָהּ, צַדִּיקִין מִתְרַפְּאִין בָּהּ וּרְשָׁעִים נִידּוֹנִין בָּה. שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״ו …
I See Your Point, But I Hear Your Idea Nedarim 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-11-01 00:00:00
Seeing and hearing are often metaphors for understanding. Is there a difference in the Hebrew language when sight is used, versus hearing, to connote perception and knowledge of events? Our Gemara on Amud Beis reflects on the danger of incurring the wrath and disapproval of the Sages. וְתַנְיָא: כׇּל מָקוֹם שֶׁ״נָּתְנוּ חֲכָמִים עֵינֵיהֶם״, אוֹ מִיתָה אוֹ עוֹנִי It is …
Completely Human and Incomplete Nedarim 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-31 00:00:00
Honest acceptance of a limitation brings a person closer to transcending the limitation than stubbornly denying that there is one. On a psychological level this is because we cannot work and grow to the fullest extent if we defensively deny the problem. On a spiritual level, when we take things as far as we can, and then we give it over to God, He will close the gaps for us. But if we just keep thinking, “I’m f …
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Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-25 11:31:10
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The Silent Treatment Nedarim 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph describes various oaths people make, apparently in anger to forswear social contact with another person. Silent Treatment is a human behavior that has been used throughout history to express discontent and shun others. Let us study this phenomenon. According to researchers Agarwal and Prakash (“Psychological Costs and Benefits of Using Silent Treatment”, Journal of Research in Humanities and Social Science Vol …
Hair Splitting Discussion Nedarim 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-28 00:00:00
What is the significance of the Nazir not cutting his hair? We can understand that the Nazir’s abstaining from cutting his hair is to shun vanity, as is described later on in the mesechta 9b. The Rama in Toras Haolah (III:71) explains further that the Nazir is required to abstain from three aspects: He must not drink wine, he must not become impure and he must not cut his hair. Each of these abstentions relate to a different kind of h …
The Torah Speaks in the Vernacular Nedarim 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses an exegetical principle, דִּבְּרָה תוֹרָה כִלְשׁוֹן בְּנֵי אָדָם The Torah speaks in the language of men. That is to say, sometimes there can be extra verbiage if it adds to poetic value or is part of how people use idioms. This is an obvious point, as in order for the Torah to be comprehensible and even objectively pleasant, it must use phrases that are generally u …
Deep Understanding Nedarim 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-27 00:00:00
The Ran (“U-shevuous”) on Amud Aleph uses an interesting phrase, לא ירדתי לסוף דעתו which literally means, “I was not able to descend into his understanding (or opinion)”, in other words, “I couldn't understand his reasoning”. It is interesting to use the word descend when it comes to understanding. Actually, a similar but opposite phrase is used in Midrashic literature (for example, …
Personal Touch Kesuvos 112 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about the various ways the sages expressed their love for the Land of Israel: רַבִּי אַבָּא מְנַשֵּׁק כֵּיפֵי דְעַכּוֹ. רַבִּי חֲנִינָא מְתַקֵּן מַתְקָלַיָּה Rabbi Abba would kiss the rocks of Akko, which was on the coast of Eretz Yisrael. Rabbi Ḥanina would repair its stumbling blocks, i.e., any potholes in the land, so that travelers would …
Be Careful What You Wish For Kesuvos 111 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-25 00:29:15
Even in the metaphysical world where all things are possible, it can be a bad idea to push too hard. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph, according to one text of Rashi, discusses an “oath” placed upon the Jewish people in exile to abstain from “pushing for the end.” Rashi explains the Jewish people should not force the Mashiach to come via excessive prayer. That is a difficult idea to understand. Can there be too much prayer? And I …
Growth and Comfort Do Not Coexist Kesuvos 110 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-24 16:43:18
(source of title quote Ginny Rometty)
Change is not easy, even when it is a good change. Some of life’s most stressful moments come with good changes, such as marriage, birth of a child or moving neighborhoods. Our Mishna on Amud Beis discusses the marital considerations required when moving, even from a lesser quality environment to a higher quality environment: שָׁלֹשׁ אֲרָצוֹת לַנִּשּׂוּאִין, יְהוּ …
Unkept Promises Kesuvos 109 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a situation where a father-in-law is unable to come up with the funds that he promised for a dowry. The Mishna uses an unusual idiom: פָשַׁט לוֹ אֶת הָרֶגֶל His father-in-law “stuck his foot out” Rashi offers two peshatim: (1) He sticks out his foot in disrespect. That is to say, “I have no regard for you; clean off my shoes. (2) He says he is broke, sticking out his foo …
In-Sight Kesuvos 108 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis uses an interesting phrase to describe Rabbi Gamliel’s approval of the opinion of another Tanna, named Admon: רוֹאֶה אֲנִי אֶת דִּבְרֵי אַדְמוֹן I “see” the words of Admon. Clearly, the word “see” in this context means more than physical sight. It means seeing with the mind’s eye and heart, seeing the idea from the inside out. Ramb …
Spousal Abandonment Kesuvos 107 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Gemara on Amud Beis discusses various scenarios of abandonment by a husband and/or yavam of a married woman. Though relatively rare, spousal abandonment seems to be a human behavior that goes back to ancient times. What are some of the psychological considerations? According to researcher Elaine Brinkley (Smith) (BRINKLEY, E. (1998). The Dynamics of Marital Disintegration. National Undergraduate Research Clearinghouse, 1.): Spousal a …
Gates of Repentance Kesuvos 106 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph tells us that there were seven gates in the Second Bais Hamikdash. What is the symbolic significance of these seven gates? Sefer Yetzira tells us that there are seven gates to the soul. That is: two eyes, two ears, two nostrils and the mouth. Shalah (Torah Shebiksav, Shoftim, Derekh Chayim) interprets the verse, “You shall place Judges and police by all your gates” (Devarim 16:18) as app …
Blind Body Connection Kesuvos 105 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph, paraphrasing a series of verses, warns that a judge who takes bribes, even merely by accepting flattering actions, will eventually be blinded to the truth, and perhaps become literally blind. תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: ״כִּי הַשּׁוֹחַד יְעַוֵּר עֵינֵי חֲכָמִים״, קַל וָחוֹמֶר לַטִּפְּשִׁין. ״וִיסַלֵּף דִּבְרֵי צַדִּיקִים״ …
God of “Salivation” Kesuvos 104 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
Judaism, like the healthy personalities it seeks to foster, is not rigidly about one thing. Most principles in Judaism are about balancing a tension between important and conflicting values. How could something as important as Torah, or the human personality it is designed to develop, possibly be monolithic? If so, there would be no need for more than one human. Judaism has ascetic and self-abnegating values, while at the same time discouraging e …
An Answer to Prayers Kesuvos 103 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-16 00:00:00
There’s a Jewish quip about prayer that I have always disliked, not because it isn’t true, but rather because it’s irritating in its smug self-satisfaction.
A person complained that he prayed and prayed and God didn’t listen. His rabbi answered, “Who says God didn’t listen? He listened, and the answer was ’No.’” While this might be true, it is cold comfort to one who needed a mirac …
Erev Yom Tov Madness Kesuvos 102 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-14 14:10:11
Our Gemara on Amud Beis, cautioning against allowing a young child to be taken care of family custodians who have a stake in his inheritance, relates a macabre story:
תַנְיָא: מִי שֶׁמֵּת וְהִנִּיחַ בֵּן קָטָן לְאִמּוֹ, יוֹרְשֵׁי הָאָב אוֹמְרִים: יְהֵא גָּדֵל אֶצְלֵנוּ, וְאִמּוֹ אוֹמֶרֶת: יְהֵא בְּנִי גָּדֵל אֶצְלִי …
Blended Families Kesuvos 101 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-14 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis discusses financial arrangements for fathers and stepfathers. Blended families present significant challenges, and sadly, otherwise successful relationships have failed as a result of the conflict between parents and step-children.
According to Walsh (Walsh, W. 1992, Twenty major issues in remarriage families. Journal of Counseling & Development, 70, 709-715) some factors to consider are:
(1) What to call t …
A King-Sized Request Kesuvos 100 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis mentions a Tanna, Rabbi Elazar ben Parata, and actually his grandfather as well. I could find nothing to comment on about this daf, so I’ll discuss biographical notes about Rabbi Elazar ben Parata. He, similar to Rabbi Chaninah ben Tradiyon, was arrested for ”crimes against the state”, the age-old anti-semitic canard against Jews who taught Torah, as teaching subversive treasonous material. Th …
We Are All in the Same Boat Kesuvos 99 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-13 00:00:00
What is shelichus or agency at its core? On the one hand, it makes sense that we should be able to appoint another person as an agent to represent us and execute transactions. On the other hand, it is absurd. How can anyone ever really speak for us and stand in our place? Even more puzzling, how is it that certain mitzvos can be accomplished by agency, and others not? (Generally, the rule of thumb is that a mitzvah that mu …
A Job Done Too Well Kesuvos 98 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-12 00:00:00
One of the famous questions regarding the slavery and oppression of the Jews, and the resulting retribution against the Egyptians is why should Pharaoh be punished for following God’s decree? God tells Avraham that his children will be strangers in a strange land, and serve them for 400 years. Yet in the next verse God assured Avraham that the oppressors will also be judged, and the Jewish people will leave with great wealth (Bereishis 15:1 …
The Psychology and Function of Stigma Kesuvos 97 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-11 00:00:00
Stigma is a powerful human emotion. Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses possible additional allowances made to a divorcee so that she may collect her kesuba more easily. The Gemara says it is due to “Chiyna” “being favorable”. Rabbenu Chananel (see Tosafos) interprets this is having some additional financial status to overcome the stigma of divorce and make her more desirable to suitors. We should respect …
Independence versus Interdependence Kesuvos 96 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-09 00:00:00
Even though it is not good to be a burden on others, in close relationships, being able to receive kindness and service is a part of the relationship. People want to feel needed and want to have the opportunity to give to those whom they love or regard. Sometimes, resistance to love and intimacy hides behind false piety. It can be a kindness to also accept, not just to give. Our Gemara on amud aleph tells us: אָמַר ר …
Forced Interpretation Kesuvos 95 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-09 00:00:00
When coerced, especially those in fear, may lie or be evasive. It is not because they are inherently dishonest people. Rather, the typical human response to fearful aggression is passive aggression. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses situations where certain legal transactions, though done in a manner that would ordinarily indicate sufficient intent, are rendered non-binding if the rabbis believed that the wife was under emotional coercion …
Shuda Be The Right Choice Kesuvos 94 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-07 00:00:00
How useful is intuition according to Torah philosophy? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a dispute about two property deeds of sale both with the same date. In such situations where the law is in gridlock, that is there is no reasonable way to resolve a litigation, the Beis Din responds in various ways, depending on factors that we will not discuss in depth right now. The judges may declare that the assets in question be divided equally, which o …
Even God Says Please Kesuvos 93 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-07 00:00:00
Since God can do anything but also gives humans free will to make moral choices, we may surmise that He chooses to let us choose. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses acquisition of real estate by walking along the borders of the property. There is a discussion amongst the Rishonim (see Rashi and Tosafos) about the precise nature of this demonstration of ownership. Regardless, there is a Biblical precedent in Hashem’s invitation to Avraham to …
Grievous Grievances Kesuvos 92 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-06 00:00:00
We know the Jews in the wilderness complained quite a bit. Did they have justification for doing so? Our Gemara on Amud describes a scenario where Reuven sold a field to Shimon with a stipulation that he will bear no responsibility if a prior creditor comes with a lien on the field and repossesses it. If that occurs, there is a question as to whether Reuven could offer claims in the court case as co-defendant, since essentially he is not a Baal D …
Blessings in de Skies Kesuvos 91 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-04 00:27:09
How do you assign value to something that is priceless? As the saying goes though, the best things in life are free. As we discussed in yesterday’s daf, the kesubas benin dichrin is a circumvention of Torah inheritance law designed to encourage the father of the bride to give generous dowries. We also discussed that they only allowed the Kesubas Benin Dichrin clause to be activated when there would be at least one dinar left from the estate …
Inherited Difficulties Kesuvos 90 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-04 00:25:22
Inheritances are serious business and no parents want their children to squabble about their yerusha. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the institution of Kesubas Benin Dichrin, which is a rabbinic enactment designed to protect the mother’s familial assets. The rabbis established a rule that the woman’s kesuba and accompanying Nedunya (dowry) shall go to her sons, and not any step brothers should the husband remarry. There …
Emotional Amnesty Kesuvos 89 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud aleph mentions the institution of Prosbol. Since this year many have written prosbols on erev Rosh Hashanah, I thought reflect on this remarkable takanna. In a magnificent utopia blend between capitalism and socialism, the Torah accepts fair trade and commerce but also places certain limits to protect people from sinking into irrevocable poverty. The Torah asks that creditors forgive debts at the end of the Shemitta …
Without Safety There is No Intimacy Kesuvos 88 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-02 00:00:00
What are some of the psychological functions of the kesuba? We saw earlier in Psychology of the Daf (Kesuvos 82) that financial security is important for the woman to feel safe in the marriage. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph considers that a special allowance is made for a widow in that she can collect payment of her kesuba from her husband’s possessions even if he is not present. Or as discussed on 84a, the ability of the widow to collect …
Honest to God Kesuvos 87 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-30 00:00:00
When a person rationalizes his sins, the personal dishonesty might causes additional distortion beyond the original sins, with even more toxic effects. Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse (Devarim 19:15) that is used to describe the powers and limitations of a singe witness versus a pair: לֹֽא־יָקוּם֩ עֵ֨ד אֶחָ֜ד בְּאִ֗ישׁ לְכׇל־עָוֺן֙ וּלְכׇל־חַטָּ֔את בְּכׇל־חֵ֖טְא …
Honest Intentions and Responsible Actions Kesuvos 86 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-30 00:00:00
Are honest intentions the same as honesty? If a person fully commits to something but later is unable to fulfill his pledge due to an unforeseen and legitimate change in circumstance, is that considered dishonest? Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses the idea of perias baal chov mitzvah, that there is a specific Torah directive to repay a loan. But what is the scriptural source? Rashi uses the derasha found in Bava Metzi’a (49a): …
Hitting Bottom Kesuvos 85 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-09 01:31:35
Humans constantly bargain with forces of nature and truths that aren’t really interested or responsive to our bids. A colleague of mine, Dr. Norman Blumenthal has famously remarked, “People do not come to me for change. Instead they are (falsely) hoping that I can help them find a trick to alleviate the difficulties without having to change a darn thing.” Our Gemara on Amud Aleph described the act of rowing as “mimlach mel …
Public Vs Public Confession Kesuvos 84 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-28 00:00:00
Does repentance halakhically depend on a verbal itemization in confession, or is it sufficient to simply confess that one has sinned? This is subject to a debate in Yoma (86b) between Rabbi Yehuda ben Bava and Rabbi Akiva. Rabbi Akiva holds that it is sufficient to confess sin in general, without specifying each trespass. Our Gemara on Amud Beis states a general rule regarding halakha and Rabbi Akiva. The halakha is in accordance with Rabbi …
A Cucumber in Hand is Worth Two in the Bush Kesuvos 83 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-28 00:00:00
What is more motivating? A cheap reward that comes quickly or a significant reward that takes much longer to obtain? Our Gemara on Amud Beis references an adage, “בוצינא טב מקרא”. Rashi translates botzina as a small gourd and Kara as a large gourd. The idea is the same as, “A bird in hand is worth two in the bush.” That is, a person would prefer a small gourd, which he can eat right now, instead of waitin …
Taking Trauma Personally Kesuvos 82 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-25 00:00:00
Who wants to get married more, a man or a woman? Elsewhere in Psychology of the Daf (Yevamos 107) we discussed social research on gender attitudes toward marriage and various rabbinic assumptions. Today we will look at a different angle of willingness versus reluctance to marry. Our Gemara on Amud Beis reports at first they would write the kesuba, but set aside the funds instead of having the husband’s entire estate subject to a lien. …
Don’t Fight, Get Divorced Kesuvos 81 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-25 00:00:00
There are times where ambiguity and uncertainty is more painful than direct confrontation, even if the confrontation is objectively more damaging than the pending-but-not-certain-to-be-realized event. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses an interesting psychological phenomenon, but to understand it in context we need to learn the sugya for a bit. If a man does Yibum he inherits the kesuba from his deceased brother which becomes re-activated fo …
Charitable Investments, Trust! Kesuvos 80 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara engages in a complex legal discussion involving situations where a person provides an unsolicited service of value to another. Say, for example, you enter into another person’s field and plow and plant it. While he did not ask for this, the owner will receive some benefit for this, and therefore the halacha is that he must pay for the service nonetheless. The amount is subject to adjustment though, and depends o …
A Token of Appreciation Kesuvos 79 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-23 00:00:00
It is important to show gratitude. Sometimes gratitude does not involve much effort or expenditure, so long as it is sincere. Our Mishna on Amud Beis teaches us: הַמּוֹצִיא הוֹצָאוֹת עַל נִכְסֵי אִשְׁתּוֹ הוֹצִיא הַרְבֵּה וְאָכַל קִימְעָא קִימְעָא וְאָכַל הַרְבֵּה מַה שֶּׁהוֹצִיא הוֹצִיא וּמַה שֶּׁאָכַל אָכַל ה …
States of Doubt and Transition Kesuvos 78 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-22 00:00:00
In psychology of the Daf (Kesuvos 70) we discussed the importance of liminal states. Whenever a person is in transition from one state to another, it is symbolic of rebirth. Psychologically speaking, many people regress or reactivate past traumas and attachment patterns when they pass from one life stage to another, such as a graduation or marriage. Rashi on Amud Aleph (Eimar) uses cryptic language to describe a woman when she is betrothed (arusa …
Beauty May be More than Skin Deep, But he Gets Under My Skin Kesuvos 77 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-21 00:00:00
As we saw in Psychology of the Daf Kesuvos 75, the Gemara identifies a feminine quality of being able to find a husband attractive and even noble, despite glaring external and personal flaws. Yet it also is important to realize that this does not happen in a vacuum; she may be looking to find his good side but he also must endeavor to bring it out (see the Ben Yehoyada we quoted.) Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the Mishna that describes ce …
Mum’s the Word Kesuvos 76 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-20 00:00:00
As religions go, Judaism tends to be practical and avoids extreme asceticism, at least for the uninitiated. Even though marriage is not only about physical and sexual gratification, Judaism does not ignore the basic sensual and physical needs necessary to form and maintain a loving bond. Amud Beis discusses marrying and then later discovering a deal breaking blemish. While we are on this topic, Akeidas Yitschok (Chayei Sarah 16) asks a seri …
Anti-Hero Kesuvos 75 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-19 00:00:00
How far does loyalty go? Can you be married to a scoundrel but still see the good in him or her? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a feminine tendency to make peace with, and even appreciate the qualities of a husband, in spite of him not appearing objectively to be a good catch. אַבָּיֵי אָמַר: דְּשׁוּמְשְׁמָנָא גַּבְרָא כּוּרְסְיַהּ בֵּי חָרָאתָא רָמֵי לַהּ. Abaye sai …
The Importance of Honesty in Maintaining Civilization Kesuvos 74 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara at the end of Amud Beis tells us that Rabbi Yehuda holds that an oath made in public cannot be annulled . His proof is from the Gibeonites, who fooled Yehoshua into thinking they were foreigners and refugees from a distant land, leading them to make an oath and treaty with them (see Yehoshua chapter 9). Even though it was done under false pretenses, at least according to Rabbi Yehuda, the main reason why Yehoshua honored the oath is th …
A Chinuch Lacking in Promise Kesuvos 73 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the situation of a man marrying a woman and then discovering that she had many oaths which has an impact on their personal life. This may invalidate the marriage, as he can say, אי אפשי באשה נדרנית I did not want to marry a woman who is a serial oath maker. Aside from the basic burden of being liable for too many restrictions, Maor Vashemesh (Matos 8) suggests a more characterological p …
Immersed in a State of Fear Kesuvos 72 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara and Mishna on Amud Aleph discusses certain breaches in the marriage that forfeits the woman’s right to her kesuba. One of these breaches are if the woman falsely pretended to not be a niddah, when in fact she was, leading to them having relations during a forbidden time. This phenomenon happens more often than people would like to believe. I have no statistics, but having the privilege of working with couples for 28 y …
Self Deprecatory Comments Kesuvos 71 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-15 00:00:00
There are times that the people we love say self-deprecating and critical remarks: “I am such an idiot”. What is the respectful thing to do? On the one hand, people do not like to be corrected and also want to be validated. On the other hand, it is risky to be quiet because the person may feel insulted, thinking, “So you agree that I am a fool.” And then, of course, sometimes the person really did somethi …
Dying for Reassurance Kesuvos 70 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the principal of Mitzvah Lekayyem Divrei Hames, it is a mitzvah to follow he instructions and fulfill the wishes of the deceased. What is the reason for this principle? We might consider that it is for practical reasons, in order to effectuate the legal transfer of assets without complex kinyanim or contracts, since a person who is about to die may not have the time or tools to execute a proper will and te …
Reading the Torah that is in Between the Lines Kesuvos 69 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph relates that Rav recorded a halakhic question in a letter of greeting, by inserting it between the lines or margins. Some commentaries explain that he did this because he wanted to limit the degree of permanence vested in the halakhic note, as he was reluctant to write down Oral Torah. (See Rashi and Maharam Schiff.) From early childhood, we are taught that the Torah comes in two forms: The Written Torah and t …
God’s Long Hand for the Handicapped Kesuvos 68 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-12 00:00:00
Sometimes it’s frustrating when you encounter a beggar who claims to be suffering from various mishaps illnesses and misfortunes, but you wonder if he or she might be faking. It is a Torah violation to turn down a beggar (Devarim 15:7, Shulkhan Arukh YD 247:1), yet sometimes your gut tells you, “This is a scam”. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the situation of the beggar who fakes his illness in order to inspire more generosi …
Grandiose Charity Kesuvos 67 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-11 00:00:00
When is it permitted to have ulterior motives along with a mitzvah? Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses the tragic ending of Nakdimon Ben Gurion who was immensely wealthy, but became impoverished. The Gemara wonders what could he gave done to suffer such a fate when he gave abundantly to tzeddakah? One answer given is that he did the mitzvah in order to aggrandize himself. Maharsha asks, did we not learn in Rosh Hashanah (4 …
Mixed Motives Kesuvos 66 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-09 00:00:00
There are times where we must do distasteful things. The overall good or needs of the moment may override certain moral or ethical sensitivities. What should be your mindset so the experience is less corrupting? Mei HaShiloach (Lech Lecha 7) darshens our Gemara to elaborate on this theme. Avraham finds himself in a position where he was victorious in the war to win back his nephew, Lot. He is offered the spoils yet declines to take them because ( …
Loosening Up Kesuvos 65 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-09 00:00:00
I want to address a sensitive topic regarding sexual challenges that can affect couples of all ages, especially but not exclusively, the newly married. A person may have a degree of misplaced piety and be overly scrupulous about sexuality, or just plain feel uncomfortable with sexual feelings and sensuality. Sometimes, being overscrupulous in the area of intimacy and halakha can be the result of naiveté and/or anxiety. After all, if a reli …
Suffering in Silent Desperation Kesuvos 64 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-08 00:00:00
While conventional wisdom holds that men suffer from sexual deprivation more than women, the Talmudic perspective is more nuanced. The Gemara on Amud Beis tells us: אֲמַר לֵיהּ רַבִּי חִיָּיא בַּר יוֹסֵף לִשְׁמוּאֵל: מָה בֵּין מוֹרֵד לְמוֹרֶדֶת? אֲמַר לֵיהּ: צֵא וּלְמַד מִשּׁוּק שֶׁל זוֹנוֹת, מִי שׂוֹכֵר אֶת מִי? דָּבָר …
Putting the Jew in Jewelry Kesuvos 63 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-10-09 01:32:07
On this daf we hear about the great sacrifices that Rochel made to support her husband the famous Rabbi Akiva in his study of Torah. As the well-known story goes, Rabbi Akiva was unlettered and unlearned but Rochel saw great character and potential in him. She married him even though her wealthy father disowned her and she endured 24 years of poverty while her husband studied Torah abroad. When she finally sees her husband she throws herself at h …
Don’t Come Home Late Kesuvos 62 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-06 00:00:00
How important is it to keep your word, even about the small things? I believe that trust, not just the literal kind, but the deep emotional kind, is built on consistent and reliable connection. If you say you’ll be home by a certain time, or will complete a certain task, keep your word. If you can’t, send an update. Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells as tragic story of a righteous man who was unable to keep his word, which highlights the d …
Can Eliyahu Hanavi Come and Visit? Kesuvos 61 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-05 00:00:00
A fixture of Jewish lore is Giluy Eliyahu, that is a revelation of Eliyahu the Prophet. What is this experience and how does it compare to prophecy and Ruach Hakodesh? Is it something that can still be experienced today? The Gemara (Sotah 48b) speaks of a cessation of the ability to experience prophecy and ruach Hakodesh in successive generations but notably never ruled out a final mode of divine revelation, the bas kol. (Elsewhere in Psychology …
Enmeshment: Momma’s Boys and Daddy’s Girls Kesuvos 60 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-04 00:00:00
Our Gemara mentions a problematic pattern of behavior that can, according to the Gemara, even affect a woman’s likelihood of conceiving: Redufa leylech el beis aviha, When there is contention in the marriage and the woman tends to return back to her father’s home.There is a normal human pattern for young women to connect to and seek guidance from their mothers, as we saw by Rivkah (Bereishis 24:28): וַתָּ֙רׇץ֙ הַֽנ …
Don’t Suppress Feminine Instinct Kesuvos 59 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-02 00:00:00
Elsewhere in Psychology of the Daf (Moed Kattan 9, Ta’anis 13, and Yevamos 34) we discussed the importance of beauty. It is a natural feminine instinct to want to appear attractive, and like any instinct, the Torah approach is to respect it and work with it without overindulgence or excessive asceticism. (See Rambam Deos, chapters 1-2.) Our Gemara on Amud Beis brings up this idea as well, however I think it may be misinterpreted by o …
How Much Checking Do You Need to Do? Kesuvos 58 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-27 22:05:28
One of the opportunities and challenges of Shidduchim is doing adequate and proper research. The cliche and much maligned question of whether the family uses a plastic tablecloth on Shabbos, is not merely urban legend. Whether or not that’s your burning question, it behooves us to discuss what level of research is necessary. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses whether the “checking out” that relatives do is sufficient enough so as …
Do Not Rush Development Kesuvos 57 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-09-01 00:00:00
It is an important psychological principle that once a developmental window closes, it is much harder to re-open it. For example, there is an optimum time for toilet training, when the 2-3 year old shows interest in mastery over his or her body. If parents encourage this collaboratively, the child will enjoy meeting one of the first challenges in life — to renunciate instincts in favor of social status and competency. If t …
More on Sex vs. Intimacy Kesuvos 56 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-31 00:00:00
There is a saying, that men give affection in order to get sex, while women give sex in order to get affection. While of course this is not absolutely true, and especially in our times where each gender is feeling more free to express themselves along less designated official roles and behavior, it does seem to be a basic pattern in human nature that endures. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses as a scenario where a couple had the chuppah ceremony …
Owning Your Intentions Kesuvos 55 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-30 00:00:00
What does it mean to own something? Is a possession just something that belongs to you, or is there some kind of metaphysical valence that an object takes on when you possess it? There would seem to be a certain significance attached to objects based on their owners, for example, we have a teaching that even the animals of the righteous do not commit transgressions (see Chulin 7a). Or, that certain food utensils must be immersed in the Mikv …
Protecting Others from Your Indulgences Kesuvos 54 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-29 00:00:00
There are instances in life where our personal expression or enjoyment of life should be considered in relation to how it affects others. For example, if you are making a wedding of your youngest child. On the one hand, it’s your last hurrah and you have come by your money honestly, so why not splurge and enjoy the celebration with many extras such as a larger band, and a more extravagant venue? Yet, how will this make ot …
The Wicked Son Returns Kesuvos 53 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the Rabbi’s frowning upon disinheriting a child, even partially, and even if the child is considered a wrongdoer. The rabbis say, “It is not known what seed will come from him. Perhaps the bad son will father worthy children.” The Agra DeKalla (Bo:52) uses this idea to explain a difficult Midrash. The Yalkut Shimoni (208) states: When the verse says, “And so it shall com …
Negotiating with Terrorists Kesuvos 52 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses various psychological techniques when considering negotiating with those who kidnap for ransom. אֵין פּוֹדִין אֶת הַשְּׁבוּיִין יוֹתֵר עַל כְּדֵי דְמֵיהֶם, מִפְּנֵי תִּקּוּן הָעוֹלָם. הָא בִּכְדֵי דְמֵיהֶן פּוֹדִין, אַף עַל גַּב דְּפִרְקוֹנָהּ יוֹתֵר עַל כְּתוּבָּת …
Unbearable Urges Kesuvos 51 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-26 00:00:00
Note: Aside from yesterday’s post, which included both dappim, today’s post is a repeat from Psychology of the Daf Moed Kattan 17. That posting included a significant line in our Gemara Amud Beis, which implied that sometimes a person can be faced with urges that cannot be controlled. People often repeat this line, “Hashem does not give you a nisayon (challenge) that you cannot overcome.” While this might inspire som …
There Cannot be Enduring Love Without Respect Kesuvos 50 & 51 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the upper limit of charity, which is one fifth of earned income. The scriptural proof text comes from Yaakov (Bereishis 28:22), where he pledges to Hashem: “And of all that You shall give me, I will surely give a tenth of it [aser a’asrenu] to You”. The double use of the verb that means to donate one-tenth indicates that Yaakov, who issued this statement, was actually referring to two one-tenth …
Unrecognizable Differences Kesuvos 49 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-24 00:00:00
What do you do when you do not recognize your children? Of course, I do not mean physically, as that would be unlikely. I mean, if their behavior is so foreign to you, that you wonder, “How do I even know this person, how can I love him or her?” Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a contradiction between two teachings, where one says that the Raven cares for its young, while another teaching implies that Ravens do not care f …
In Order to Perform a More Perfect Union Kesuvos 48 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-23 00:00:00
Warning: This posting contains sexually explicit content relating to the mitvah of marital relations Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the obligation for a husband (and wife — see Ritva) to not hold back from skin to skin direct contact during marital relations out of a sense of false modesty. The psychological benefits of skin to skin contact on mood regulation and the release of the oxytocin binding hormone has been scientifi …
Transition Time Kesuvos 47 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-22 00:00:00
There is a known halakhic principle of Tosefes Shabbos, that is one is supposed to accept or bring Shabbos a few minutes earlier. One of the Lomdishe chakiros discussed is if this addendum to Shabbos is an early start for Shabbos, and essentially Shabbos itself, or is it a special zone to prepare for Shabbos, which is Shabbos-like in quality, but not actually Shabbos. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph implies that a woman can marry on Shabbos and Yo …
It's the Thoughts that Count Kesuvos 46 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-21 00:00:00
The majority of Torah commandments more often focuses on actions and deeds, not thoughts. Yet there are certain commandments that focus on our thoughts and how we must guard them and shape them. (Chovos Halevavos wrote his Sefer by that name because he felt these mitzvos were ignored.) Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us: ״וְנִשְׁמַרְתָּ מִכֹּל דָּבָר רָע״, מִכָּאן אָמַר רַבִּי פּ …
Reluctantly Reluctant Kesuvos 45 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-19 00:00:00
It is said about Rav Yisrael Salanter that in order to gain credibility in the eyes of the Lithuanian Lamdanim, so they would consider his encouragement to form mussar study groups, he would give an in-depth pilpul shiur. Only after earning their esteem, all the way at the end of the shiur, he would say, “It is a good idea to form mussar vaads.” (See Appendix to Shu”t Seridei Aish, where he gives his own oral history …
Reduced Sentencing Kesuvos 44 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-19 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the case of two obligatory contracts that seem to be stating the same thing. Does the second contract abrogate the first, and therefore we follow the dates and commitments in the second contract? (This would have an impact on liens dated from the first contract, which will now be annulled.) The Gemara concludes that when the contracts are identical, we assume the second one abrogates the first. …
Is Mortality a Punishment or a Gift? Kesuvos 43 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the principle of Modeh Bekenas Patur. That is, if a defendant admits in court prior to prosecution by witnesses, he is exempt from fines. Such as, the thief who normally would be fined double payment if convicted, can pre-empt this fine by confessing prior to witnesses testifying against him. He then is only obligated to pay the principle and no further punitive damages. Yismach Moshe (Bereishi …
The Sin of Self-Betrayal Kesuvos 42 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-17 00:00:00
If you accept that the Torah’s commandments are for our ultimate benefit, a sin is not merely a betrayal toward God, but even a betrayal toward ourselves. Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Vayikra (5:21) that discusses the violation of denying under oath monetary claims: “If a person will sin, make a violation to Hashem, and deny his friend’s claim regarding an object entrusted to him or financial matter or t …
Walls and Self-Deception Kesuvos 41 Psychology of the Daf
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-16 00:00:00
Self-deception and unconscious self-destructive urges are confounding. At times, we make best and sincerest efforts to avoid falling into certain patterns and dysfunctional behavior. Despite this, like lemmings, we hurl ourselves over the cliff to our doom. Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse (Devarim 22:8) that instructs one to make their home safe: כִּ֤י תִבְנֶה֙ בַּ֣יִת חָדָ֔שׁ וְעָש …
Irrational Parental Requests Kesuvos 40 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-15 00:00:00
What is the extent and nature of the commandment to honor parents? Is it to honor requests of substance that bring them benefit, as enumerated by Gemara Kiddushin (31b, quoted below), or is it even to honor their requests that have no concrete benefit? In other words, if your father or mother ask you to pour them a glass of tea, this is honoring their request and brings them a concrete benefit. But what about if one’s parents say, “Do …
It is Not Fine at All Kesuvos 38 and 39 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-14 00:00:00
It seems to be a staple of modern and ancient law, and even aspects of halacha to enact fines upon perpetrators. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph (see Rashi as well) notes that the institution of fines represent an extra-judicial response that is not about compensation per se, but some form of punishment. According to the Klein Dictionary, the etymology of the word Kenas is Greek. It is related to the word census, which is to count.&nbs …
Respect for Psychological and Physical Torment of the Victim Kesuvos 37 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-12 00:00:00
The Torah’s response to accidental death when there is a degree of negligence is for the perpetrator to go into exile until the death of the Cohen Godol, as our Gemara on Amud Beis describes. But what is the reason for exile? The verses offer a mixed message because there is reference to not accepting payment as exchange for forgiveness (as described in our Gemara), which implies exile is a form of penance, yet the verses also speak o …
Listen Your Way to a Better Intimate Life Kesuvos 36 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-11 00:00:00
The great mystics saw God in everything. The more physical something is, the more intensely spiritual potential is locked within it. After all, if God leaves a road sign, it pays to read it carefully. When there is so much physical energy present, it is only the tip of the spiritual iceberg. This is why erotic and sexual imagery is used constantly by the Zohar and other mystical works. It’s much more than a metaphor. …
Backlash for Sins Kesuvos 35 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the verse in Devarim (25:2-3) which are the scriptural source for the punishment of lashes. It is notable that though the verse states 40 lashes, there is a rabbinic tradition that seemingly overrides the explicit verse and the number of lashes is never to exceed 39. (For more on the philosophical and psychological implications of this dichotomy, see Psychology of the Daf, Kesuvos 32.) Regardless of the …
Rav Soloveitchik Meets Heschel Kesuvos 34 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-09 00:00:00
What makes Shabbos into Shabbos? It is told that when Rav JB Soloveitchick was showed AJ Heschel’s book, “The Sabbath”, he commented. “Shabbos is ‘An Oasis in time? (Heschel’s poetic term, implying that Shabbos is unique space in time) — No, Shabbos is the 39 Melachos!” Despite this very Lithuanian quip, the Shabbos is called holy, and how can we understand what that means in practical t …
Miscarriage of Justice Kesuvos 33 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-08 00:00:00
It is a fact of life, psychologically and religiously, that the human psyche is in constant conflict and turmoil. Our Gemara quotes a verse that describes a quarrel between two men, an injured female bystanders and her fetuses. Toldos Yaakov Yosef reads into these verses a insightful allegory of the eternal struggle between the good inclination and the evil inclination. The verses are as follows (Shemos 21:22-24): וְכִֽי־יִנָּצ֣וּ …
More on Psychology of the Oral Torah Kesuvos 32 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-07 00:00:00
The Oral Torah is taught to us when we are grade school children as a fact and feature of Torah, with little explanation as to its function and significance. I venture to say that many people just think of it as two parallel Torahs; one was originally written while the other was not. This does not make much sense as there should logically be a reason why certain aspects of the Torah were originally designated as oral and other parts not. From a s …
Don’t Kill Off Ideas Kesuvos 31 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-05 00:00:00
Our ideas and our thoughts are metaphorically our offspring. When a person formulates an idea, he or she goes through a process of “conception”, literally and metaphorically. The execution of the idea, bringing it from conception to delivery, is the final birth of the thought, as it now becomes action. Our sages teach us, “The main progeny of the righteous are their good deeds.” (Rashi Bereishis 6:9, base …
Neurotic Fear versus Reasonable Caution Kesuvos 30 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-05 00:00:00
One of the great challenges in the sphere of religious behavior and personal autonomy is how much effort is appropriate versus trusting and relying on God. What is controlling and arrogant? What is too passive and trusting? In today’s daf, we will examine some classic Jewish thought on the matter, as well as discuss some of the psychology of anxiety and religion. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph makes the famous declaration …
When There is Coercion, There Also is Obligation Kesuvos 29 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-04 00:00:00
Continuing our theme from yesterday’s daf about fear in the classroom and pedagogy, there is another dynamic involved in a relationship of dominance. Whether ideal or not, when one party coerces and dominates the other party, there also is a moral obligation about the dominant party to provide for the subjugated party. It is a truism in human nature. For example, though the master may have many servants and obviousl …
Fear in the Classroom and in Pedagogy Kesuvos 28 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-03 00:00:00
Much as we would like to think of school as a positive and happy place, we cannot dismiss the necessary element of fear as part of the educational experience. In order for teachers to maintain respect and order, students must have some degree of fear in relation to their authority. Of course, taken to an extreme, children who experience overwhelming dread and anxiety will not learn well, and even if obedient, will be less likely to ex …
The Yetzer Hara Always Has Time Kesuvos 27 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-02 00:00:00
When it comes to certain sins or desires, humans are ingenious and relentless in achieving their goals. An addict could spend hours, overcoming great adversity, planning and plotting to get his or her fix. Halakha recognizes this as well. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph raises a contradiction between our Mishna’s case and a Mishna in Avoda Zara (70b). Our Mishna teaches us if a city was invaded by a marauding army, women who were married to …
Courting Contempt Kesuvos 26 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-08-01 00:00:00
How far does the Jewish tradition go to protect the authority of the court? Will the court reverse its ruling when new evidence appears, even if this makes the judges appear incompetent? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the concept of זילותא דבי דינא a denigration of the Jewish court of law. The Gemara considers that in a situation where new legal information came up that overrides the original ruling, in certain cases the judges s …
The Special Mitzvah of Taking Challah Kesuvos 25 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-25 00:00:00
Our Gemara quotes the verse in Bamidbar (15:18) that describes the mitzvah of Challah, “When you enter into the land that I have brought you.” Because of the emphasis on entering the land, as opposed to conquering it, Challah is different than Terumah and other Israel-related produce that is separated and made holy. The obligations of Terumah and maaser only became activated after the land was acquired. However, the obliga …
Why Do People Fake Their Identity? Kesuvos 24 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses what kinds of testimony is valid to establish lineage. The Gemara has much skepticism about individuals claiming certain lineage. This makes me wonder, lomdus aside, why not trust a person who declares his identity, especially when in many situations of issur v’heter we trust a person's own testimony, even relating to their food or other personal halakhic issues? We have recently learned of many agunah situations …
Early Sexual Trauma in Marriage Kesuvos 22 & 23 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-28 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph and Beis, discusses a situation where a woman told her husband that she was a niddah, and then later retracted. The issue is, can we believe her retraction or must she go through a process of counting and Mikvah as if she really was a niddah. The basic halakha is that if she gives a credible explanation for why she falsely claimed to be a niddah, even though she wasn’t, she is believed. Notably, an …
Does God “Want” Validation too? Kesuvos 21 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-27 00:00:00
Humans are social and dialogic. From our earliest moments, our consciousness and development of mind come from interaction and experience with a loved one. We learn how to live and feel from our mothers’ initially, and then an expanding network of persons, who show love and care by seeing us, empathizing with us, mirroring and interacting with us. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the possibility of a person serving simultaneously as a witn …
Memory Retrieval and Accuracy Kesuvos 20 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-26 00:00:00
The only way we know anything is our memory. We must rely on it to stay sane, make calculations, and learn from experience. But just because it’s all we really have, is it reliable? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses a dispute between Rabbi Yochanan and Rav Huna as to the extent that witnesses can use written notes to remind them of their testimony. Rav Huna requires that they remember some aspect prior to reading their notes, and the …
Prerequisites for Penitence Kesuvos 19 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-25 00:00:00
How important is regret in the process of repentance? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the verse in Bamidbar (5:7) דַּבֵּר֮ אֶל־בְּנֵ֣י יִשְׂרָאֵל֒ אִ֣ישׁ אֽוֹ־אִשָּׁ֗ה כִּ֤י יַעֲשׂוּ֙ מִכׇּל־חַטֹּ֣את הָֽאָדָ֔ם לִמְעֹ֥ל מַ֖עַל בַּה׳ וְאָֽשְׁמָ֖ה הַנֶּ֥פֶשׁ הַהִֽוא׃ Speak to the Israelites: When men or women indivi …
Talmudic Good Samaritan Law Kesuvos 18 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-24 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the Talmudic equivalent of the Good Samaritan Law. Namely, that even though ordinarily someone who makes a partial admission to a claim is Biblically obligated to make an oath (Shevuas Modeh Bemiktzas), if he is returning a lost object, the rabbis exempted him. To illustrate, ordinarily if Reuven accuses Shimon of owing him $100, and Shimon denies it, Shimon is Biblically exempt as there is no proof or gro …
Does This Dress Make Me Look Fat? Kesuvos 17 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-22 00:00:00
We will continue our discussion from yesterday's daf about the famous dispute between Shammai and Hillel over whether one should be honest when praising the Kallah or exaggerate. Tosafos points out the obvious, that Bais Shammai was not advocating actively discussing her flaws. Bais Shammai was simply saying either keep quiet or focus on praising the Kallah for her genuine good qualities, but do not lie. Bais Hillel though was e …
Let God Fill in the Blanks Kesuvos 16 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis begins a discussion about how to praise and dance before the Kallah. Much ink has been spilled and thousands of hours of Sheva Berachos Torah has been created on discussing the famous machlokes of Beis Shammai and Beis Hillel regarding whether the Kallah should be praised in an exaggerated fashion or not. Over the next two daf, I will discuss a few interesting and out of the box interpretations of this often qu …
Why Do They Throw Stuff at the Chosson? Kesuvos 15 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-21 00:00:00
Our Mishna on Amud Beis refers to a custom where they would give out roasted grain at the wedding ceremony of a virgin. What is the basis and symbolism of this custom? Abudarham Laws of Blessings Ninth Gate Blessings on Commandments Marriage Blessings, quoting a verse (Tehilim 147:14) השם גבולך שלום חלב חטים ישביעך which equates peace with abundance of plump grain. Thus, we are wishing upon the marriage peace …
Verbal Self-Defense Kesuvos 14 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses an interesting scenario of the Mamzer Veshasak, which means that a person is accused of being a mamzer, but does not object. This can be seen as an indicator of admission. However, in apparent contradiction to this, the Gemara in Kiddushin (71b) tells us: When two people quarrel with each other, observe which of them becomes silent first. We can assume the silent party is of finer lineage …
Years and Tears Later: The Price of Lies and the Price of Truth Kesuvos 13 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on this daf continues a discussion of case law where important information was allegedly withheld prior to marriage and discovered later. In yesterday's Psycholgy of the Daf, we discussed the obligations of others to reveal information. Continuing this theme, we will discuss the halachos and psychology of self-disclosure of flaws prior to marriage. There is a Teshuva of Rav Moshe Feinstein regarding a young woman who was s …
Honesty and Exaggeration in Shidduchim Kesuvos 12 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-18 00:00:00
How much exaggeration is normal when describing a Shidduch? How much should the person himself or herself disclose about flaws? How much should others? We will discuss these matters from a halakhic and psychological perspective over the next two dappim. Our Gemara states that if a man married a woman who was previously married and maintained she was a virgin, even if it turns out that she wasn’t, the husband has no claim that the marriage w …
Children of Baale Teshuva Kesuvos 11 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses different scenarios of conversion, such as if parents convert with children, as well as possibly if the child is an orphan and adopted, if he can be converted by the Beis Din and go to a foster family. Because a minor cannot really give consent, there also is a discussion about whether he can renege when he becomes Bar Mitzvah. The Rishonim, including Tosafos, grapple with the legal and halakhic mechanisms that …
By Your Blood Shall Ye Live Kesuvos 10 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses a case of a woman who was lacking in menstrual blood, and also possibly those who tend to have less menstrual and virginal blood. On the one hand it is considered an advantage, in reducing questions about Niddah. But it also presents a problem regarding fertility. This ambivalence about menstruation on a practical level is also discussed in a mystical sense by Rav Tzaddok in Peri Tzaddik (Lag Baomer 5):&nbs …
Self-Determination, Autonomy and Authority Kesuvos 9 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph and Rashi (“Ne’eman”) refer to a basic Talmudic principle known as Shavya Anafshei Chaticha Deissura, which means that a person has the ability to declare something to be forbidden based on his belief, even if there is no compelling evidence. Thus, he must conduct himself as if it is forbidden, even if to outsiders there is no such obligation. The commentaries debate the conceptual underpinning of …
Attitude of Gratitude Kesuvos 8 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis cautions against making negative and pessimistic declarations, as somehow verbalizing them can cause them to come about. Jewish tradition most definitely believes in the power of words. A number of sources that were brought to my attention,, courtesy of Rabbi Moshe Elafant’s sugya shiur on this daf are: A Teshuva of the Rashbah (Hameyuchas Leramban 286) states that we cannot know sometimes why bad …
Sex Vs. Intimacy Kesuvos 7 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the nature of the Blessing over Eirusin (betrothal). According to one opinion, the blessing is a simple one without a concluding blessing. According to another opinion, the blessing has a closing benediction. The Gemara suggests the basis of the dispute is about whether we compare the betrothal blessing to a blessing on food or mitzvos, which are short and do not conclude with a blessing, or it is com …
An Original Slant on an Ancient Practice Kesuvos 6 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-12 00:00:00
In today’s Psychology of the Daf, we are going to discuss an ancient sexual practice from the time of the Talmud, and what it can teach us about sexual ethics in marriage. Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses some technical halakhic aspects of a virgin having intercourse for the first time on Shabbos. Since there can be bleeding, is this considered inflicting a wound, which is forbidden to do on Shabbos? There are numerous iterati …
Building the Inner Sanctuary Kesuvos 5 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-11 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph through Beis relates several teachings of Bar Kappara, which at first do not seem linked, but we shall see are connected: There are two optimal days for marriage, Thursday and Friday. Thursday because the blessing for the fish to be fruitful and multiply was stated (Bereishis 1:22), and Friday because the blessing for Man was stated (ibid, 28). The preference is for the marriage day to be Friday if not for c …
Magnification or Focus Kesuvos 4 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-10 00:00:00
It’s not fashionable to discuss stereotypical differences between how the genders process and express emotions, because it can lead to dismissing or mocking feminine emotionality. However, in truth there is no shame in having strong and intense experience of emotions, and it offers advantages in terms of the ability to be intuitive and nurturing. There is an interesting Rashash that discusses these gender differences to explain a halakhic d …
Sinners Count Too Kesuvos 3 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-08 00:00:00
To what extent is the sinner given recognition and respect by Torah society. The relationship with the sinner is a complex one with great emphasis placed on the community using social pressure and often legal enforcement to maintain desired behavior. Yet, despite this, there also seems to be a practical acceptance of the existence of sin and sinner, and often Torah society remains accepting and loving as we shall see in today’s discussion. …
It’s Your Bad Luck Kesuvos 2 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-08 00:00:00
In our Gemara’s analysis of responsibility to fulfill a wedding date pledge, they discuss different scenarios of unexpected delays. Depending on whose fault or fate the delay is attributed, it makes a difference in if the man becomes obligated in supporting his wife even prior to the wedding. Thus, if the wedding is delayed due to her becoming ill, the Gemara considers that he may still have to pay her support as if he was the one who becam …
Only the Shadow Knows Yevamos 122 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tried to determine if a disembodied voice that was heard could be trusted as valid testimony. One of the concerns is this voice may have come from a demon instead of a human, and so a process to discern between a true human or a demon is necessary. The Gemara asserts that a demon’s shadow is different than a human’s shadow. While both may cast a shadow, a human’s shadow is capable of having a shadow on t …
Curious Instead of Furious Yevamos 121 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-06 00:00:00
Curiosity is a powerful relationship tool. We think we know someone else, we think we understand their motives, and we would like to believe we are right and know better. Yet, if we maintain a more curious attitude, especially when we feel frustrated or angry instead of becoming judgmental and indignant, we can turn difficult moments into learning and growth. The Gemara on Amud Aleph relates a story involving the great sages Rav and Shmuel, and h …
Face Facts Yevamos 120 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-05 00:00:00
What emotions and thoughts show on our faces? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quoted a verse in Yeshaiyahu (3:9) to prove the importance of witnesses seeing an intact face to identify a dead victim. הַכָּרַת פְּנֵיהֶם עָנְתָה בָּם Their sinful behavior was evident on their faces. Jewish mystical thought and contemporary psychological thought supports the idea that our faces show much about the inner workings of our psyc …
Self Injurious Instinct Yevamos 119 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-04 00:00:00
As we mentioned on the last daf, our Gemaras have been discussing various self destructive impulses. On the last daf we examined self-destructiveness that hurts others simultaneously. On today’s daf we still discuss self-destructive urges that are directed at self instead of others. According to researchers Tiffany B. Brown and Thomas Kimball, there a number of misconceptions about self-harm behaviors as well as functions that should be und …
The Psychology of Murder-Suicide Yevamos 118 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-03 00:00:00
The next two dappim of the Gemara will discuss various situations of self-injury and self-destruction. The Gemara references Shimshon’s ”Kamikaze” act upon the Philistines. At the end of his life, deprived of his miraculous strength, he was tied up and mocked in a public stadium. He prayed that God grant him one last strength, so that he “May die with the Philistines.” Thus, he was able …
Decoding Mother in Law Hatred Yevamos 117 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph and Beis discusses various halakhic ramifications of mother in law to daughter in law hatred. What does psycholgy and contemporary social research say about trends and comments of mothers in law? Researchers Christine E. Rittenou and Jody Koenig Kellas surveyed prior research and itemized and described various forms of hurtful content within Mother-in-Law (MIL) communication: (Rittenour, Christine E. and Koenig Kell …
I Didn’t Really Mean It! Yevamos 116 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-07-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses circumstances where there is suspicion of bias in testimony from a woman that her husband is deceased. One such situation is, “when there is a marital discord.” The Gemara seeks to define the term more precisely: קְטָטָה בֵּינוֹ לְבֵינָהּ וְכוּ׳. הֵיכִי דָּמֵי קְטָטָה בֵּינוֹ לְבֵינָהּ, אָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר …
Facts Do Not Care About Feelings, But We Do Yevamos 115 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-30 00:00:00
Ben Shapiro is famous for saying, “Facts Don’t Care About Your Feelings”. While he may be right, there is more to this than meets the eye. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses halachos about when we assume a captive to have been certainly killed or possibly just held hostage. One line of reasoning considered is that women may be different than men in this regard. A woman might be able to survive in captivity longer than a ma …
Rabbi Meir and the Hooligans Yevamos 114 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph refers to the verse in Vayikra (21:1) that discusses the Priestly code of conduct, but uses an unusually verbose phrase: “Speak to the priests, the sons of Aaron, and say to them: None shall become impure for the dead souls among his people” (Leviticus 21:1). What does “speak to them”, and then “say to them” come to include? להזהיר גדולים על הקטנים That the adults ar …
Sexual Torture Yevamos 113 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-28 00:00:00
As we saw on Psychology of the Daf 107, the Talmud believes there are gender differences in attitudes and wishes to get married, in that women want to marry more than men. We also saw that modern social research shows a similar trend, in that women want to marry at a younger age than men do, and it seems to be universal, the world over. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us: יוֹתֵר מִשֶּׁהָאִישׁ רוֹצֶה לִישָּׂא …
Marriage Made in Heaven but Repaired Down to Earth Yevamos 112 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-27 00:00:00
Does the Talmud believe in romance? Our Gemara on amud aleph discusses a woman who has a substantial complaint regarding her husband’s fitness, which in and of itself is subject to several different interpretations: A woman who says: Heaven is between me and you, the court deals with the matter by way of a request. This complaint, “Heaven is between me and you”, has the appearance of a euphemism, as otherwise why would she not e …
Can You Force Someone to Do You a Favor? Yevamos 111 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-26 00:00:00
What are the bounds and limits for helping another person out, and to what extent is there a legal halachic obligation? Our Gemara on amud beis describes a situation where a man is not obligated personally to perform chalitzah, as according to his account he is not bound by yibum and she was not able to furnish objective proof as to her status. However, the woman, according to her subjective account, is bound by her own admission.&nbs …
Compatibility Factors in Marriage Yevamos 110 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-24 00:00:00
Our gemara on amud beis discusses the idea that certain people may have preference in marriage for someone similar to them, such as a deaf person may prefer to marry a deaf person. If compatibility and similarity in interests are important in marriage, to what extent and what domains can be identified? Doing this can help couples work on enhancing them together, and also help people who are dating identify these areas as priorities. R …
Peace at Any Price Yevamos 109 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-24 00:00:00
Arguments and quarrels are ubiquitous in human nature, but also destructive and corrosive. Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us: A person should always cling to three things and distance himself from three things. He should cling to three things: To ḥalitza rather than levirate marriage, to bringing about peace, and to the nullification of vows. And he should distance himself from three things: From refusal (miyun performed to nullify certai …
Am I Supposed to be a Mind Reader? Yevamos 108 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-23 00:00:00
One of the modern marriage and therapy tropes is that no one can be a mind-reader, and people must take responsibility to express and communicate their needs. While this is common sense, it can be taken as diminishing the value of intuitive understanding of one’s spouse. I emphatically state to the contrary! Understanding of non-verbal cues and bids is absolutely an important relationship asset. Our Gemara on Amud Beis speaks of …
Gender Differences in Desire for Marriage Yevamos 107 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the various pros and cons that might run through the mind of a person contemplating a marriage that can be annulled through the process known as miyun. Without us getting into the complex halakhic details, the Gemara discusses why a person might risk entering a marriage that could later be dissolved. One such rationale is: תַּרְוַיְיהוּ נִיחָא לְהוּ, כְּדֵי דְּלִי …
Selling Umbrellas in the Rain Yevamos 106 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-21 00:00:00
What is the Torah ethical position on charging a fee for necessary services, and what about charging excessive fees during times of peak demand? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us “הֲרֵי שֶׁהָיָה בּוֹרֵחַ מִבֵּית הָאֲסוּרִין, וְהָיְתָה מַעְבּוֹרֶת לְפָנָיו, וַאֲמַר לֵיהּ: טוֹל דִּינָר וְהַעֲבִירֵנִי — אֵין לוֹ אֶלָּ …
Repairing the Damage Yevamos 105 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-20 00:00:00
Are certain attitudes we develop so ingrained that we cannot easily change them? What steps can be taken to overcome our personal biases and blind spots? Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us about the curse and fate of the sons of Eli the Cohen: כִּדְרַב שְׁמוּאֵל בַּר אַמֵּי. דְּאָמַר רַב שְׁמוּאֵל בַּר אַמֵּי אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹנָתָן: מִנַּיִן לִגְזַר ד …
It Hurts to Speak Yevamos 104 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the halakhic status of a mute person: אָמַר רָבָא: אִלֵּם וְאִלֶּמֶת בְּנֵי דֵעָה נִינְהוּ, וּפוּמַּיְיהוּ הוּא דְּכָאֵיב לְהוּ. A mute man and woman do have intellectual capacity. Rather, it is their mouth that hurts them. Mute individuals have full intellectual capacity; they merely lack a means of expression. This Gemara is poss …
Stray Thoughts During Prayer Yevamos 103 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara Amud Aleph to Beis makes an assertion: כׇּל טוֹבָתָן שֶׁל רְשָׁעִים רָעָה הִיא אֵצֶל צַדִּיקִים. שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״הִשָּׁמֶר לְךָ פֶּן תְּדַבֵּר עִם יַעֲקֹב מִטּוֹב עַד רָע״, בִּשְׁלָמָא רַע — לְחַיֵּי, אֶלָּא טוֹב אַמַּאי לָא? אֶלָּא שְׁמַע מִינַּהּ: טוֹבָת …
Even a Broken Home is Still a Home Yevamos 102 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-17 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis relates an encounter between Rabbi Gamliel and a heretic: A certain heretic said to Rabban Gamliel: You, the children of Israel, are a nation whose Master removed [ḥalatz] Himself from them, for God has left you in much the same way in which a yavam would perform chalitzah with his yevama, as it is written: “With their flocks and with their herds they shall go to seek the Lord, but they shall not find Him. He has r …
Having Your Psychological Cake and Eating it Too Yevamos 101 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Shir Hashirim (4:7): כֻּלָּ֤ךְ יָפָה֙ רַעְיָתִ֔י וּמ֖וּם אֵ֥ין בָּֽך Every part of you is fair, my darling, There is no blemish in you. There is a Midrash (Shir Hashirim Rabbah 4:7) on this verse which elaborates on the idea of no blemishes. The verse is referring to the Jewish people at the time of the giving of the Torah: באותה …
Zealots and Instinct Yevamos 100 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-15 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis teaches us that a cohen must have precise knowledge of his lineage in order to serve in the Temple. This applies even if he is sure that he is a cohen. So long as he does not know his exact father, then he is invalid. The derivation comes from the verse: ״וְהָיְתָה לּוֹ וּלְזַרְעוֹ אַחֲרָיו״, בָּעֵינַן זַרְעוֹ מְיוּחָס אַחֲרָיו. “And it shall be to him …
Quantum Torah Theory Yevamos 99 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-14 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the famous principle: הַשְׁתָּא בְּהֶמְתָּן שֶׁל צַדִּיקִים אֵין הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מֵבִיא תַּקָּלָה עַל יָדָן, צַדִּיקִים עַצְמָן לֹא כׇּל שֶׁכֵּן Now consider: If, even through the animals of the righteous, the Holy One, Blessed be He, does not bring about a stumbling block, then throug …
Stubborn People Might Be Prophets Yevamos 98 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes Rabbi Akiva who observed that the prophet Yonah lost his prophecy as a result of his disobedience. He refused to deliver God’s message to the people of Nineveh. Our understanding of Yonah’s behavior is that he was afraid that the people of Nineveh would do Teshuva and this would reflect poorly on the Jewish people. The Midrash sees this as impudent in that he advocated for the honor of the &ldquo …
Immortal Teachings Yevamos 97 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-12 00:00:00
The Gemara on 96b and 97a deals with Rabbi Yochanan’s strong concern that his Torah be quoted and attributed to him. The Gemara explains this as stemming from the following idea and verse: Rabbi Yoḥanan said in the name of Rabbi Shimon ben Yoḥai: With regard to any Torah scholar in whose name a matter of halakha is said in this world, his lips mouth the words in the grave, as though he is talking. Rabbi Yitzḥak ben Ze’eira …
Was Pharaoh a Lamdan? Yevamos 96 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis states that a halachic male minor who is nine years and one day old can perform the mitzvah of Yibum. However, the status of this marriage is not complete until he consummates as a bar mitzvah, and if he dies before doing so, and now his wife falls to yibum to another brother, she must have chalitza and not yibum. There is some discussion amongst the Rishonim about whether the marriage is valid according to Tor …
Taking Mitzvos “Light”ly Yevamos 95 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-10 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud aleph refers to Adultery as an Issur Kal, a relatively light prohibition, which Rashi (“makom”) explains is because the prohibition is not permanent, i.e. it lifts after divorce or death. Presumably, the Gemara does not equate the severity of the transgression and the punishment (death), with the technical aspects of the mitzvah that make it considered less severe than other forms of forbidden relations that r …
The Sage who Overplayed his Hand Yevamos 94 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-09 00:00:00
Rashi on amud beis (“v’es achas”) discusses a hermeneutical principle which is occasionally used in Shas. A word from a different language, often Greek and often the numeral one, is read into the text. For example, the Hebrew word “Hen”, is reinterpreted in the verse to mean “one”. Some good examples of this are Shabbos (31b) Moed Kattan (28a) and Sanhedrin (76b). Although I do not have a well …
Uplink to the Heavenly Cloud Yevamos 93 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-08 00:00:00
On amud beis we find Rav Yannai troubled by a dream that he had, of a splintered reed. He the dream to mean that he made a halakhic mistake, by relying on a weak proof. Rav Chiyyah comforted him, by reading the dream as the opposite, implying a broken reed is humble and therefore merits to see the truth: How did the Gemara treat dreams? Are they prophetic, or to be ignored as the result of random images and impulses firing during the night? …
Pearls of Wisdom Yevamos 92 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-07 00:00:00
Our Gemara on amud beis quotes an interesting idiom: Rabbi Yannai said to Rabbi Yoḥanan: Had I not lifted the earthenware shard for you, would you have discovered the pearl [marganita] beneath it? Rabbi Yannai was referring to the fact that his teaching inspired Rabbi Yochanan to notice a Mishna that was “hiding in plain sight” which really made the same point as his teaching. Tosafos (Bava Metzia 17b, “Iy Lav”) explains …
Is the Rabbinate Inherited? Yevamos 91 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-06 21:49:43
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a Mishna in Gittin (8:5) If he wrote the date on the bill of divorce using a calendrical system that counts years in the name of a kingdom that is not legitimate…in all these case, the bill of divorce is not valid. According to Rashi on our daf, the definition of “a kingdom that is not legitimate” is the Roman government. Rashi references a Gemara in Avoda Zara (10a) that denigrates the legi …
Direct Consequences Yevamos 90 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the power of the prophet to temporarily supersede a Torah law. That is, even though no prophet after Moshe can change the Torah on a permanent basis, for a particular need of the moment and through prophetic sanction, a law can be suspended or enacted. A lesser known idea related to this is a principle from the Sefer Haikkarim (III:18). This idea only applies to Torah laws from Moshe, however the portion of …
All Relationships Are Permanent Yevamos 89 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the principle behind the financial obligation of the Kesubah, שלא תהא קלא בעיניו להוציאה that divorcing a wife should not be a light matter. Since upon divorce, the husband will have to pay out a large sum, he naturally will think twice about divorce. The Rashbah in Bava Kama (89a) elaborates on this and explains that should a woman feel that the marriage can be dismissed lightly, her gener …
Greatness is Earned, not Given Yevamos 88 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-03 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis brings the verse that directs us to treat cohanim with extra honor, and in fact directs the Beis Din to enforce the priestly marriage restrictions. The Mei HaShiloach Parashas Emor discusses the nature of the distinction of the Cohanim, and even the nature of the distinction of Jews in general: His first point is based on the Gemara’s interpretation (Chulin 57a) of a verse in Zecharia (10:4). Though Cohanim are obvio …
A Searching and Fearless Moral Inventory Yevamos 87 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-02 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis quotes a verse in Vayikra 4:28 which uses an ambiguous phrase regarding a sin-offering, “Or, if his sin be known to him.” The phrase seems to emphasize knowing about the sin, but it is redundant, as how would he bring a sacrifice if he did not know about his sin? From there the Gemara derives a number of rules relating to what kind of information obligates a sacrifice, and what does not. If he …
Love it or Levite Yevamos 86 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-06-01 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us that Levites were punished in the times of Ezra because they did not join the group returning back to Israel, and instead stayed in Babylonia, as it stated in Ezra (8:15), “and I viewed the people, and the priests, and found there none of the sons of Levi.” The punishment was that they no longer would be eligible to receive the Maaser Rishon tithes. Tosafos here asks, the Gemara Kiddushin (69a) states …
What Is Middas Hadin? Yevamos 85 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-31 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph quotes the verse in Vayikra (21:1) “Speak to the Cohanim, the sons of Aharon, and say to them, do not become defiled for a dead person amongst your people.” Because of the redundancy, “Cohanim, sons of Aharon”, the Gemara deduces that only the sons have this obligation, and not the daughters. Thus, female cohanim are not prohibited from becoming exposed to impurities of death, and in practica …
Alternate Generation Theory Yevamos 84 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-30 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the prohibition of the Egyptian convert. A regular Jewish person cannot marry into that family fit the first two generations. He may only marry into the third generation born after the conversion, as stated explicitly in Devarim 23:9. We might wonder what is the significance of three generations? The Chizkuni (Op. Cit.) explains that it takes three generations to change the family culture. As we find the Torah de …
Don’t Shrei Over Spilt Milk (Into Meat) Yevamos 83 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-29 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis states the famous halakhic principle that one cannot make another person’s possession forbidden. For example, if I declare an object of my friend’s to be my god and object of worship and bow to it, it does not become a forbidden object that must be destroyed, unlike if the owner had done that. A person has no authority over another person’s possessions. Tosafos (“Ein”) raises a question about …
In the Quest for Truth, We Show No Favoritism Yevamos 82 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph uses a strange phrase, הא דרב אשי בדותא היא, which translates approximately as, “We must conclude that this teaching of Rav Ashi was mistaken.” The word בדותא translates into English with less contempt than the connotation In Hebrew. It is more than mistaken. It implies something made up without any basis (see Ran Nedarim 3a, “elah”, and Melachim 1:12:33.) It is difficult to un …
The Maharal’s View on Inflation Yevamos 81 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-27 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the concept that items which are numbered are considered more significant, which can affect the laws of nullification. That is, if ordinarily we might say a non kosher item will be nullified if mixed into a majority, if this non kosher item has a significance in that it is counted and sold by numbers instead of volume, it will not be nullified. The idea that something becomes important when it is counted is disc …
Conceivably Correct Yevamos 80 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-26 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records an incident of a woman whose husband was away for twelve months delivered a baby. Obviously, there ought to be a concern that this child was a mamzer, yet the Gemara rules that it is conceivable that her pregnancy lasted for twelve months, and so the child is kosher. What I find fascinating about Gemaras such as these is that often we must say Nishtanu HaTibiyyim, the medical and physiological realities have …
Intellectual Greatness vs. Spiritual Greatness Yevamos 79 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-25 00:00:00
The Gemara on Amud Aleph explains why Dovid Hamelech could not offer a reparation to the descendants of Shaul by making a proper but belated eulogy. “It is not the custom to make a eulogy after twelve months.” Why is it not the custom to do this? Rashi references a Gemara in Moed Kattan (21b) which is not referring only to eulogy, but in general we do not say Hamakom Yenachem after twelve months, because the person is already past the …
The Halakhic Rights of the Unborn Yevamos 78 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-24 00:00:00
Since abortion is entering into the national debate once again, it is good to see what the Jewish tradition has to say about a fetus’s rights and personhood. One of the questions that arise in considering the legality and morality of the unborn child is, when does this “bunch of cells” turn into a human with its own identity and rights? After all, we all are just a “bunch of cells”, just like the tomato plant in my b …
There is Nothing Frummer than Our Yetzer Hora Yevamos 77 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-23 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis records an epic dispute that took place regarding King David’s lineage. The dispute revolved around whether the prohibition against marrying a Moabite was limited to males or also included females. King David descended from Ruth, a female Moabite convert. One rationale why the females were not prohibited is the verse states: לֹֽא־יָבֹ֧א עַמּוֹנִ֛י וּמוֹאָבִ֖י בִּקְהַ֣ל ה גּ …
All’s Well that Ends Well? Yevamos 76 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-22 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses Shaul Hemelech’s introduction to David: דְּאָמַר קְרָא: ״וְכִרְאוֹת שָׁאוּל אֶת דָּוִד יוֹצֵא לִקְרַאת הַפְּלִשְׁתִּי אָמַר אֶל אַבְנֵר שַׂר הַצָּבָא בֶּן מִי זֶה הַנַּעַר אַבְנֵר וַיֹּאמֶר אַבְנֵר חֵי נַפְשְׁךָ הַמֶּלֶךְ אִם יָדָעְתִּי״. …
Every Moment is Pregnant with Possibility Yevamos 75 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara discusses various forms of infertility such as damage to testicles and other reproductive organs. Of course, one of the greatest forms of existential distress is the inability to have children. It is easy to fall into despair. A personage no less noble than the matriarch, Rachel, declared, “Give me children, for if not, I am dead.” (Bereishis 30:1) Yet we must also acknowledge that there are other ways for human …
True Confessions Yevamos 73 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-19 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Beis discusses the concept of viduy maaser, the “confessional” declaration that all of the tithed produce was not hoarded nor was it misused. What is the term viduy? The verses in the Torah don’t use it to describe this declaration, and it comes from Chazal. Pashtus, it is just a declaration not really a confession. The simple reading of the verses sound, if anything, as a declaration that on …
Rainy Day Fund Yevamos 74 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-20 00:00:00
Our Gemara continues its discussion of the various components of the declaration regarding maaser. The verses are an intriguing group in that they describe an odd set of ways to use and misuse maaser (Devarim 26:13-15) בִּעַ֧רְתִּי הַקֹּ֣דֶשׁ מִן־הַבַּ֗יִת וְגַ֨ם נְתַתִּ֤יו לַלֵּוִי֙ וְלַגֵּר֙ לַיָּת֣וֹם וְלָאַלְמָנָ֔ה כְּכׇל־מִצְוָתְ …
I Forgive You, but Do I Really? Yevamos 72 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-18 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us that the reason why the Jews did not merit the healing north wind during the wilderness was that they were “censured”. What sin caused that state? Rashi says it was due to the sin of the Golden Calf. However Tosafos argues and says that they Jews were forgiven for that sin, as it states “I forgive them”, and the Mishkan was constructed and Hashem had the Shekhina dwell there. Tosafos …
Circumstantial Circumcision Yevamos 71 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-17 00:00:00
In our Gemara on Amud Beis tells us that according to one opinion the Jews of the wilderness could not undergo circumcision due to the travails of traveling, which would endanger their lives post operatively. Ritva asks, why was Moshe punished for not circumcising Eliezer, since he was traveling and could not endanger Eliezer anyhow? Ritva answers that Moshe could have paused on his journey and waited several days until Eliezer recovered, …
Grandparent Alienation Yevamos 70 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-16 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph tells us the well-known aphorism, בני בנים הרי הם כבנים Grandchildren are considered as if they are children. Grandparents can be a resource for their grandchildren, as well as a source of satisfaction and fulfillment to the grandparents. If the relationship between the Grandparent and their child is a healthy one, the parents will also enjoy the grandparents’ involvement, offering an ex …
Roe V. Reydt Yevamos 69 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-15 00:00:00
Roe V. Reydt Our Gemara on amud beis asserts that a fetus prior to the 40th day from conception is considered as if it is “merely water”. The Gemara in Menachos (99b) also implies that the fetus does not yet have a soul until 40 days. The idea that prior to 40 days, the fetus is not considered human has implications for early abortion. Though Rav Moshe (Iggeros Moshe CM II:69) does not consider this principle to be suffici …
Spiritual Superconductors Yevamos 68 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-13 00:00:00
Our gemara on amud beis argues that even though a born female cohen becomes disqualified from Teruma after relations with a forbidden sexual relation, a Levite or Israelite widow who was once married to a cohen is different. Though she may eat Terumah as a widow if she has a child from him, she will not be disqualified by forbidden sexual relations. Even though the power of the holiness of the Levite or Israelite widow is weake …
When Does Life Become Holy Yevamos 67 Psychology of the Daf Yomi
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
2022-05-13 00:00:00
Our Gemara on Amud Aleph discusses the idea that עוּבָּר בִּמְעֵי זָרָה זָר הוא. A fetus in the womb of a non-Cohen who is married to a Cohen, is not considered a Cohen until it is born. This has halakhic implications in terms of the slaves in the household who ordinarily are allowed to eat Terumah as they are part of the Cohen’s household. However, in this case because they are partially owned by this fetus who is …