NEFESH: The International Network of Orthodox Mental Health Professionals
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In My Mind (and on the couch)
Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW A Selection Of Articles, Musings, And Information Detailing The Struggles Of The Ordinary Person; A Celebration Of The Individual's Resilience To Overcome Challenges And Live Authentically.
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Showing Results 120 - 131 (131 total)
When Death Can Be Deadly
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2017-12-17 10:19:25

The moment we are are born, we are already one second closer to our deaths. Which is why it seems to make little sense that we live in denial that it will occur, or we strive strenuously to avoid any reminder or sense of it. We speak of it in hushed tones, we think we must shield children from it, we quiet the voices in our head by pretending moisturizer or botox or a new car will save us from the inevitable. When I was a new therapist in pri …
When Force is a GOOD FORCE: getting the reluctant client into therapy
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2017-02-05 00:30:29

They come into my office and they stonewall me. You know who I mean. You know what I mean. The teenager who sits in the chair, grumpy. Refusing to engage. Like, “You dragged me here and I am here, but don't even think I am going to do anything else in here.” Yep. And the spouses—usually the husband—who acts the same way. And that's when they actually come into the therapy room. What about all those children, teens, and ad …
When I am Afraid: What's this CBT Stuff Anyway?
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-10-05 10:36:12

Question: I am even afraid to ask my question, because I don’t think I want to hear the answer. But lately, I can’t drive in tunnels. I work in Manhattan and I always drive there. A few weeks ago, I got stuck in a tunnel for a few hours. Now, there is no way I take the tunnel. I don’t really mind because I can take the bridge, but now I realize that I avoid going to the grocery store and rather send my daughters to buy what I n …
When I Was a Nobody: followers and leaders
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2017-06-04 15:08:51

The year is ending. College. Seminary. High School. Novices as work or internships. And the question is: will you lead with what you know or will you be a follower forever?  Thirty years ago, entering seminary in Eretz Yisroel, I remember the incredibly liberating feeling of being a nobody. I had been accepted (by the skin of my teeth) to a prestigious seminary in Yerushalayim and I was surrounded by the G.O presidents of every school, the …
When We Are Betrayed by Teachers and Mentors
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2017-02-28 20:27:34

I love teachers. I was a teacher for loads of years before I became a therapist. Sometimes I was a great teacher, sometimes lousy. I loved my students to pieces. I found them funny and interesting and lively and smart. I also found them a handful. They exhausted me, challenged me, irritated me. I miss the classroom. I miss the passion and excitement and butterflies in my stomach from sheer nervousness of walking int o a classroom loaded with tee …
When You Are In Shidduchim...and Therapy
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-05-01 00:00:00

  NOTE: THIS WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN BINAH MAGAZINE There are two categories of people with whom I really need to have a heart-to-heart talk. And it may be you I am talking to, so listen up. Lots of people are in therapy today. No, I am not getting into a discussion about why there are more people than ever today in therapy. All I am going to say on the subject is that people are refusing to be miserable any more than is strictly necessa …
When Your Kid Loses a Friend: Social Trauma
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-08-28 14:29:38

  Sometimes, I cannot breathe with their pain. When I was a teenager, I lived the social misery of worrying about friends. If I had them. If I lost them. What to do at any given second of time to keep them. So I am no stranger to the social drama that makes up high school. But I absolutely do not remember ever feeling the complete feeling of annihilation my clients are describing in the drama of their social lives. And I do not say this flip …
Who's Who in Therapy: those confusing initials demystified
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-07-18 00:54:20

So I just came back from the Nefesh Conference this week. Whew. Lots of fun. Lots of new information. Lots of new people! Nefesh International is a Jewish Orthodox organization for mental people—oops! I mean for professionals in the field of mental health (like me), and rabbis who are involved with the issues our communities are confronted with daily. Believe it or not, Nefesh spans the world and has branches not only in the USA but also i …
Why Do People Become Sheeple?
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2017-10-02 21:00:51

My daughter called me from her seminary in Israel. “As the only chassidish girl in seminary,” she informed me, “probably the only chassidishe girl these seminary girls have ever met in their lives, I have become the spokesperson for all of chassidish women in the world.” I laughed. “I need to explain everything to them,” she said. “Whatever I do that’s different, they need to understand. So whateve …
Writing as a tool in therapy: another List poem idea
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-09-04 10:25:57

Note: This article was originally written in Twirl, the teen publication in Binah Magazine. Another way to engage client writers to examine their behavior--I actually find many writers finding their way to me for therapy because they connect to my writing and use writing as part of their therapy naturally....so here's another:   You know how people talk about dirt or stains like they have personality? Something like, “That stain on my …
Writing in Grief Work: an exercise for teens (and adults)
Author: Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
2016-09-04 10:20:40

This article was originally used as a teleconference on the LINKS hotline, an organization that runs programs and support for teens whose parent(s) had died     Did I ever mention that my best pieces of writing come out when I am dealing with something really hard? Well, it’s true. there’s this famous writer who once wrote something like how writing needs to be as strong as a hammer against the skull to wake us up. If all …
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