NEFESH International Publications and Information
Subscribe to this blog to get the latest updates emailed to you
Subscription complete
Showing Results 0 - 40 (251 total)
Fostering Positive Behaviors
Author: By Mendi Baron, LCSW
September 4th, 2018
So many young people come through the doors of treatment struggling with a variety of behavioral and addiction issues. Oftentimes they are accompanied by their parents, who tend to feel pain, frustration, and, most commonly, guilt for their child’s struggle. What did we do? What could we have done? How did it come to this? There is no easy answer. It is difficult, maybe even impossible, to find one specific cause or lapse of judgment within …
METHODOLOGIES FOR CHANGE WITHIN THE CONTEXT OF A DATING/MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP
Author:
September 4th, 2018
By: Marcy Davidovics, LCSW The couple sitting before me were dating for 6 months. After ups and downs and working through the logistical, emotional, and practical components of their relationship, they seemed to be making headway. It was now down to one perception that one of them labeled as seemingly “non-negotiable.” They felt stuck. The concern had nothing to do with character traits or negative behavior, for those are not f …
Decisions from within
Author:
September 4th, 2018
By: Dr. Michael J. Salamon How do we make decisions? How do we process information and use it to help us determine which decisions are appropriate for us to make? The human brain is an intricate organ. It processes voluminous amounts of information every second and responds instantly to complex data. To operate that way, the brain uses algorithms, allowing us to react rapidly. Evaluating this process is an enlightening study of the brain and how …
Changing from Within
Author:
September 4th, 2018
By: Pamela P. Siller, MD The Beginning As a practicing psychiatrist, I am frequently asked how to engage an unwilling patient in mental health treatment. My response is unvaried, “It is very difficult. The desire to change must come from within.” Although the precipitant to change can take many forms, it usually involves some degree of psychic pain or discomfort, as change is neither easy nor comfortable. The next step involves a will …
Change: It’s Not About Them
Author:
September 4th, 2018
By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Many parents see changing some part of their children’s behavior as a critical goal. They feel that it is their duty to fix their children, to eradicate any negative patterns of behavior. Some try to teach, lecture, give examples, and tell stories all in an effort to get their children to change. However their children already know the rules. They know that they should wait their turn, follow directions, etc. They d …
The Change From Within
Author:
September 4th, 2018
By Lisa Twerski, LCSW When we are children, our parents can imbue us with a healthy sense of self. They love us and we feel loved, they show confidence in us and we feel self-confident, they esteem us and we feel self-esteem. They may do this by expressing these things directly. They may do this by giving us the opportunity to try and succeed or fail, showing us that we have them by our side no matter what. There are many ways parents can seek to …
An Open Letter to Caregivers for the Opening of 5782
Author: Adina Segal, LCSW
September 3rd, 2021
The month of Elul is the only time it is brought down in Halacha to visit the graves of departed family members. While there are a variety of reasons for this, it is a way to connect us to the full spectrum of the lifespan and to connect us to those who came before us. Instead of being a morbid practice, this minhag is meant to assist us in focusing on reevaluating our actions and priorities in our lives. In the vein of both teshuva and con …
The First Step Toward Change
Author: Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.
September 1st, 2021
Dear Readers, Welcome to the August edition of Mind, Body & Soul, themed “Taking the first step”. I’d like you to consider the many and varied ways that people take their first steps. A baby, transitioning from crawling and cruising to walking, is literally taking his first step. Until now he did not even have the capacity to walk. Children and adults, who can already walk, sometimes feel as though they are stuck in a …
First and Most Important: The Foundation Stone of Marriage
Author: Dr. Alan Singer
September 1st, 2021
The foundation stone of a building, also known as the cornerstone or setting stone, is the first stone set in the construction of a masonry foundation. All other stones will be set in reference to this stone, and will thus determine the position of the entire structure. This metaphor can be used in searching for the foundation stone of marriage. In my professional opinion, the foundation stone of marriage is TRUST. …
Why do We Hate The People Loved?
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R
September 1st, 2021
Why do We Hate The People Loved? Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, DHL, LCSW-R The Recent daf Yomi (Succah 4b), quotes a verse (Shemos 25:22) that becomes the inspiration from one of my favorite sayings in the Gemara. וְנוֹעַדְתִּ֣י לְךָ֮ שָׁם֒ וְדִבַּרְתִּ֨י אִתְּךָ֜ מֵעַ֣ל הַכַּפֹּ֗רֶת מִבֵּין֙ שְׁנֵ֣י הַכְּרֻבִ֔ים אֲשֶׁ֖ר עַל־אֲר֣וֹן הָע …
Emotional Well Being for Older Adults
Author: Douglas Balin, LMSW, MPA
September 1st, 2021
The Covid 19 pandemic has placed a spotlight on a long-neglected issue; the emotional health of older adults in America. Older adults have become a significant part of our society. Each day, 10,000 individuals celebrate their 65th birthday in the United States, and there are more than 40 million people over the age of 65, according to the Census Bureau. Peluso, Watts and Parsons, in their book, Changing Aging, Changing Family Therapy, predict tha …
Its Not On Me
Author: Tzipora Shub, LCSW
September 1st, 2021
My trusty 2008 Honda Accord was in the shop (it had been acting a bit less trusty than usual), and my very generous friend who was going out of the country on vacation offered me her brand new Toyota Corolla to use while she was away. It’s sleek, compact, smooth, and still has the new car smell. We were getting along great, the car and I, until it started telling me what to do. (I see some married people nodding at this point. You get it). …
Why Is it So Hard To Take The First Step?
Author: Shuli Sandler, Psy.D.
September 1st, 2021
Many of us know what we want. We have ideas of what we want to accomplish, we may make lists, or set goals. And yet, productive action often evades us. We may feel a gap between what we want to achieve and what we do. Other times, we may feel confused and unable to define what it is it that we truly want. How do we take that first step? Or rather, why is it that we often don’t take the steps to define what we want and accomplish our goals. …
Write Your Way Home
Author: .Yocheved Rottenberg, CJF
September 1st, 2021
Imagine I told you that I know of a therapist that costs about a dollar an hour, has a lot of availability and is surprisingly effective. You wouldn't believe me, but I'd insist it's true. Take out a notebook, find yourself a pen, and begin writing. Therapy has officially begun.
Therapeutic writing is research-based, effective and very simple. Once you learn to do it properly, you can achieve tremendous growth by understanding yourself, cont …
Just in Time
Author: Rabbi Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.,
November 30th, 2022
Mordy, a 40-something father of three, has been meeting with me for about a year. We focus on issues of intimacy, productivity, and accountability. His wife, Leah, works downtown, in an
executive position. Mordy’s graphic design job allows him to work part-time from home. He is present for their children, and manages assorted household responsibilities.
Mordy struggles, though, to follow through on tasks. The work-projects he unde …
Empowering Ourselves
Author: Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.
November 30th, 2019
Dear Readers: Welcome to the newest edition of Mind Body & Soul. Its theme is. Power is an evocative term, an emotion-laden concept. Allow me to illustrate: Have you ever been in the presence of a powerful person? How did you come to know that they were powerful? Did you feel as though their power was supporting you, that some of their power might even be flowing through you, making you stronger? Alternatively, were you painfully aware of hav …
Taking Responsibility
Author: Sara Teichman, PsyD
November 30th, 2019
Taking responsibility—for our attitudes, actions, and behavior—is a sign of maturity and good mental health. So, while we can understand that a five-year-old denies taking a cookie when his face is covered with crumbs, we are less forgiving of the adolescent who cheats on a test because “all his friends do.” As we mature, we develop more of an internal locus of control, (i.e. the understanding that our behavior is the resu …
Empowerment
Author: Pamela Siller, MD
November 30th, 2019
“To be empowered you have to know what you want for your life and why. Without some degree of personal empowerment, your life will live you. Nothing changes unless you change it. No matter what you’re seeking it can only happen if you do something about it” (The Startup) Some children are lucky enough to grow up with parents who are nurturing and supportive. They teach their children from a young age that they can accomplish the …
Addiction Challenges a Parent’s Love
Author: Alberta Montano-DiFabio
November 30th, 2019
In my present life, I welcome the opportunity to write on the topic of addiction, but this was not always the case. Life experiences, knowledge, and the healing of time have brought a clarity of thought and feelings to be shared. For some, this article may provide an opportunity to experience an inside view on addiction as well as new information and insight on the effect of addiction on families with a focus on how it challenges a parent’s …
Narcissism: Self Love Disordered
Author: Dvorah Levy, LCSW
November 30th, 2019
In the last edition of The Jewish Press’s Mind, Body and Soul, I published an article on attachment templates. In my article, I described a woman struggling to heal from a narcissistic relationship with her ex-husband only to find herself drawn to narcissists when she began dating again. In response, multiple individuals reached out to me wanting to talk about their relationship with a narcissist. Due to the interest this sparked, I thought …
Are Positive-Thinking Gurus Snake Oil Salespeople?
Author: Benjamin Halpern, LCSW
November 30th, 2019
There are so many gurus who talk about positive thinking. They teach that everything is essentially positive. You need to recognize that everything is great and rosy, if you don’t then you are not thinking positively, and you will not have the happy life that you desire. This is taken even a step further, that if you don’t see something as positive, you make it become negative; you are in control and responsible for all the negativity …
Caring for an Invisible Illness
Author:
November 30th, 2019
I once had an ingrown toenail which got removed but kept coming back. So, I went to my foot doctor to treat it. As I was sitting on the reclined chair, he sprayed a saline solution, which numbed my toe and allowed him to work on it without causing me an ounce of pain. He finished his job, but I couldn’t wear my regular shoe, as my toe had swelled from the injection. And so, I was given a boot to wear for two days. I was a bit embarrassed to …
When Compassion Heals
Author: Rabbi Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.
November 29th, 2022
Dear Readers
Welcome to the November edition of Mind Body & Soul, themed “Is there more than one way to heal?” Interestingly, most of the articles submitted focus less on the differences between treatment modalities and more on the common threads of effective, healing treatment. Also, several articles challenge the notion that emotional healing must eradicate any and all vestiges of illness. In particular, Douglas Balin d …
Resilience for Healthy Living
Author: Douglas Balin, LMSW, MPA
November 29th, 2022
Resilience can be thought of as G-ds natural medication for a healthier and thriving life. We can learn a great deal from resilient people and each one of us can take advantage of this wonderful and holistic tool to stay physically and emotionally healthy. Some have it innately; most of us must learn the secrets. The best part is, we can all learn to become resilient. We can train ourselves to improve our lives and obtain the skills and knowledge …
Approaching Healing with Realistic Expectations
Author: Dr. Alan M. Singer
November 29th, 2022
Please don't be disappointed if this essay approaches the topic of healing with a measure of skepticism. From my professional point of view, there may not exist the concept of “complete emotional healing”. When discussing trauma with my MSW students at the Touro University Graduate School of Social Work, I begin the semester by quoting Dr. Sue Johnson (creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy) who states that our role as therapists is t …
Putting the Jew in Jewelry
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, LCSW-R, DHL
November 29th, 2022
On a recent daf yomi (Kesuvos 63) we heard about the great sacrifices that Rochel made to support her husband, the famous Rabbi Akiva, in his study of Torah. As the well-known story goes, Rabbi Akiva was unlettered and unlearned, but Rochel saw great character and potential in him. She married him even though her wealthy father disowned her, and she endured 24 years of poverty while her husband studied Torah abroad.
When she finally sees he …
Resistant to Change: Can a Treatment- Resistant Client Be Helped?
Author: Chaya Rubin, Ph.D.
November 29th, 2022
There used to be a popular joke about psychologists that went as follows: Q: How many
psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? A: That depends on if the light bulb
wants to change.
The mutative process in therapy is no laughing matter, though, and mental health
professionals differ in their understanding of these mechanisms. The most popular
therapeutic methods, namely behavioral therapies, hum …
Living in Real Time
Author: Eitan Zerykier
November 29th, 2019
What is it like when you cannot find an item that you need, your child whines, or you see someone toss an entire meal’s worth of McDonald’s wrappers and soda bottles out their window? Frustrating, annoying, and disgusting? Our brain automatically sends us messages in response to what we see, hear, or experience around us. What we do next defines how we live our lives. No one will remember what you were thinking, only how you behaved. …
Staying The Course of Parenting
Author: Rabbi Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D.
November 28th, 2021
Dear Readers Welcome to the November issue of Mind Body & Soul, titled “staying the course”. The term “staying the course” may not be familiar to everyone. Staying the course, in its most literal sense, refers to those on a sea journey, facing forces – be they powerful storms, loss of power, or even pirates – that jeopardize their reaching an intended destination. A skilled traveler calmly adjusts in a mann …
Change Is Essential To Mental Health
Author: Dr. Alan M. Singer
November 28th, 2021
"Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change." (Jim Rohn) I am not trying to be a contrarian, but when I saw that the theme for this Mind-Body-Soul is Staying the Course, I thought to myself that one foundation of our field of mental health is to NOT stay the course. The founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy, Dr. Sue Johnson explains it this way: clients come into our offices with one story, and we help them leave with …
A Nagging Problem in Marriage
Author: Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, LCSW-R DHL
November 28th, 2021
The Gemara Beutza 35b describes the halakhic status of water dripping into a house from a leaky roof, and if it is permitted to put a pot underneath it to collect the drippings. You can imagine this man’s wife begging him to get the roof fixed before Yom Tov (the Holidays), and him procrastinating. While we are on the subject of leaky roofs and nagging, let us take a look at what Mishlei (Proverbs) has to say about this: משלי כ״ …
Staying The Course - The Big Picture
Author: Esther Gendelman, MS, LPC, CPC
November 28th, 2021
One word encapsulates the theme of staying the course. That word is LIFE. If we want to choose life, we choose to stay the course no matter what happens. Sometimes, the course is filled with pain and grief while at others, there are experiences that elicit intense joy and we savor each moment. I might be a young child whose world changed when a parent died, or a special needs sibling was born, or my parents divorced, or I experienced …
Introduction November 2017
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Yehuda Krohn, PsyD A little over a month ago, many of us were present in shul when Megillas Kohelles was read. In perhaps the best known section of Kohelles, the beginning of the third chapter, we are introduced to the notion that there is a time and season for every object under the heavens. What is remarkable about what follows – a time to give birth, a time to die; a time to plant, a time to uproot; and each of the subsequent pairings …
Defusing Defensiveness
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Sara Teichman, Psy.D. Do you feel like you can’t tell your kids anything? Even something like “remember your lunch money” or “Did you shut the air in your room?” Forget about something that is actually instructive – mind you, not critical. So, does a reminder that there is a family Bar Mitzvah the night before finals or a suggestion to take winter clothes to the school Shabbaton elicit a barrage of eye rolli …
Choose a Therapist Wisely
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Michael J. Salamon, Ph.D. A recent report from ABC News Australia validates what those of us in the field already know, “Poorly trained relationship counsellors (are) doing more harm than good.” According to the Australian College of Relationship Counsellors, couples experiencing marital difficulties are turning to therapists who are not well prepared but are less expensive. This is due to the fact that, in Australia, less prepared …
Misdiagnosed: Overlooked medical issues and their effects on children’s behaviors
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Rachel Rosenholtz, LCSW *Names and circumstances have been altered to protect client privacy He’s out of control. David is constantly fighting with kids in his class and taking things from them, often unprovoked. He has been this way since he entered preschool a year ago. He is defiant at school and aggressive at home. Leah has a difficult time focusing and following instructions. She often appear …
Sober Kiddushes and Sober-Brengens
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Yehuda Krohn, Psy.D. Author’s note: The privacy and confidentiality of individuals found in this narrative was safeguarded, by modifying identifying details. Our session began, as scheduled, the Sunday after Simchas Torah. I waited for Moe to choose a starting point. He opened with “Well, Yom Tov was fine. It was really draining, though.” I thought I knew what Moe meant: There …
Being a Mindful Parent
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Esther Goldstein LCSW How can you provide a framework for your children to develop into confident, solid individuals who can build meaningful lives? Let's take a look at the trajectory of a life. Children come into this world seeking safety, love, connection, and responsiveness. What matters beneath it all is that child know they are seen, heard, responded to, and reassured with safety. This way they can begin to trust that they are saf …
Parent Child Relationship Building: The Power of Praise
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Regine Galanti, Ph.D. A parent was recently in my office to discuss her young daughter’s defiant behavior. She described noticing that, in her relationship with her children, she’s constantly busy with them, but rarely gives them her full attention, especially if they’re not misbehaving. As a parent, I can relate. My children take up almost all of my time, cooking their dinners, supervising homework, shepherding them between …
Emotions Of Loss
Author:
November 28th, 2017
By Dvora Entin, LCSW Let’s share a cup of tea: the emotional experience of grieving a pregnancy loss Bereavement doesn't really come with an instruction manual. Mourning does. As Torah guided people, we get the directions about burial, shiva, tearing clothes, where to sit, and what to cover, but the experience of what comes next is a bit absent for the grieving. Especially for those that have a less defined, focused period for …